Finding Home
by Fantasy Writer '92
Summary: Just when everything is starting to settle after the events of new moon (with the exceptions of Jacob, Victoria and the Volturi) Bella's world is once more turned upside down with the arrival of her highly opinionated disabled cousin, Nicki. Will Bella heed her words of wisdom? And Will Nicki ever find resolve for her troubled past as she searches for the one place she belongs:Home
1. Chapter 1

**FINDING HOME:**

A Twilight's Eclipse - Breaking Dawn AU Fanfiction

By Fantasy Writer 

Charlie Swan broke the silence between him and his daughter "Ok so you're not grounded anymore. But I want you to use your newfound freedom to see some of

your other friends like Jacob" Bella winced, she kept trying but Jake wouldn't give her the time of day. "Also" he continued, "I'm going to need your help a little more

around here, because your cousin Nicki is coming." Bella's eyes lit up _"Really? That's great Dad!"_ Thinking that with someone else here keeping house, she'd have

more time to spend with Edward. "I wouldn't get so excited Bells. That poor kid's had it rough these last ten years. Losing either parents in one form or another.

She's going to need help." Bella sighed, hearing the weight in her father's words _._

 _"Oh! I'm so sorry Dad, but I don't see why you need me around more_

 _I mean Nicki can surely take care of herself right?"_ Charlie groaned, "Bells, the poor girl has no legs"

Bella blinked as she let the information sink in.

 _"What?"_ "There was an accident…" Bella sat in her room thinking _'Ok so I'm free but conditionally: 1, I have to patch things up with Jake if he'll let me.  
2, I'm stuck babysitting my 15 year old legless cousin when she arrives._

 _But that doesn't matter for soon I will have forever to spend with Edward and the rest of my family._

 _Oh the joys of being immortal! If only Edward would let the marriage idea go. I would give him anything else._

 _Now I understand that things were different in his time but can't he see that doesn't work for now. I mean look at Charlie and Renee: They married young, had me and were divorced within the first two years. And the idea of Children, Forget it! I raised Renee. Not to sound mean, did she do anything for me besides giving birth? Now I'm going to raise somebody else…."_

Nicole Swan (aka) Nicki:

'The sound of rain on the roof of the cruiser is almost like nature's lullaby to my ears. I'm fighting to stay awake though.

It's not a good idea to fall asleep in front of a cop even if he is my Uncle.

Given my experience of having police "escort" me back to "my" foster home. But that's in the past, time to see my favorite pampered "Cousin."

"Sorry the guestroom isn't ready yet. There wasn't enough time" said Uncle Charlie after we finished bringing in the bags.

"Its fine, I brought an air mattress that I can set up in the living room."

Charlie looked at me uncomfortably, obviously aware of my "situation".

"You're sure? I have to go to work but I could have Bella help you when she gets back."

then whispered to himself "Damn Cullen Boy".

Before Bella's voice called out from the kitchen _"Dad! Be Nice! We are here you know"_ "Sorry!"

Charlie then grumbled "Just great" As I got closer I heard: _"He'll warm up to you… eventually. Just give him time"._

Then the boy dubbed Edward spoke up " _Love, if he hasn't done it yet, he probably never will. Just accept it_."

 _"NO! I-"_ Bella started to shout but stopped as she saw me coming around the corner.

 _"Nicki"_ she greeted, trying to sound welcoming but I wasn't fooled.

 _"Nice to see you again"_ "Thank you, you look good" I answered politely.

"More than good" said Edward, chalk white boy. He snickered as Bella once again took the reins and introduced us.

As I shook his hand I noticed how cold he was but I ignored it and excused myself to make some hot chocolate.

Letting the lovebirds do their thing. I returned to the living room to find my bed all set and Edward and Bella making up the sheets and everything.

This was a surprise I know how less than thrilled she is that I'm here.

I've heard it all before: Another burden of responsibility cramping their style. Edward popped his head up and looked at me with a sad and concerned expression.

Can he hear me? He nodded once, I inaudibly gasped quickly motioned quietly for him to zip it.

I think Edward got the message for he smiled and turned his attention back to Bella.

"You guys, thank you. Just try to remember: I'm Disabled not Helpless" They both laughed.

Later that night….as I struggled to sleep. My ears picked up soft mumbling from upstairs. I recognized the voices.

Apparently Edward and Bella were having a sleepover in her room, not that I care.

None the less I figured I'd better do the right thing and check on her. Uncle Charlie did mention she had a rough time getting through the night.

I managed to wobble all the way to the chair lift. Once I reached the top I overheard: "I know the consequences to the choices you're making. After a few decades, everyone you know will be dead…. My Bella just less fragile."

"Nicki's coming" I opened the door, finding Bella laying on her bed by herself. "You two alright?" I asked. "Yes we're – How did you know?"

"Please! I have very good hearing. Now if you and your undead lover would cease to make the bed springs creak and pop.

You might be able to get away with it"

I turned around and retreated but not before catching a glimpse of Bella's dilated pupils. I had just gotten comfortable when I felt a wintery presence, opening my eyes to find Edward staring at me.

"What do you want?" I groaned. Now I understand most girls at Fork High would kill to have that happen to them but not me.

Especially at 2:30 in the morning when I haven't had enough sleep.

"I just want to talk" "Not now" Edward positioned himself on my makeshift bed and smiled down at me.

"You sure?" "Very" I stated starting to get annoyed with his dazzling attempt.

"Listen, what you're doing may work on other "dimwitted" women but not me" That wiped the smirk right off his face and raised an eyebrow.

"I don't do well without sleep" He nodded solemnly. "Discussion for tomorrow? When I've had sleep and coffee" holding my hand out as if making a deal.

Wordlessly he put his arctic hand in mine and shook it.

"Until tomorrow" he agreed.

As the days and weeks passed, I found myself falling into the simple routine of School and Home.

Sure people looked at me strangely (especially in gym) but that was nothing new to me.

Edward, whenever he came over for Bella, had decided much to my pleasure.

To leave me be after our little talk. I suppose you're wondering how that went.

I'll give you the Reader's Digest: I confirmed I knew his "secret". NO! I wasn't going to tell. WHY? That was my business _not_ his.

Just know that he and his family were safe from me squealing.

Edward the pessimist, pointed out that a human knowing of the "existence" must either be killed or "turned".

Judging by the way he spoke to Bella. You could tell he wasn't in favor of the change.

So I asked him if he was offering to "speed up" the process. Seeing as I was already sick and had basically come "home" to die.

That shut him up! I concluded our chat saying "Not talking" before walking away on my new "legs".

Bella was another thing…

After the first week, I got tired of Charlie instructing Bella to stay home and watch me instead of hanging out with Edward and his family.

And listening to her try to hide her groan. So finally I sat them down and explained: "Look, I'm not helpless and I'm definitely NOT RENEE (I said for her benefit).

I've been taking care of myself for years and that not about to stop now. If Bella wants to go hang out with her friends, she should.

I'm quite used to being alone. But I'll have your cell numbers just in case alright." Charlie was surprised but agreed, Bella was incredulous as she stared at me.

The girl honestly didn't realize how much we were alike in that aspect: Independence. From that time on things were different between us.

Bella knew that I knew about Edward and his family: The Cullen's. But luckily she was ignorant of the rest (aka my condition).

My special thanks to the mind reader for not blabbing. I had never met them apart from Edward.

So she filled me in on everyone, grateful and thrilled to have someone who was in on the secret that could be trusted.

She invited me to the Cullen's several times, saying they wanted to meet me. Even Edward backed her up but I respectfully declined.

I wouldn't let myself get tangled up with Vampires again, I couldn't. Fate had other plans though.

Sooner or later I, like Bella was destined to meet and join the Cullen family.

Not as a mate but something I'd only ever dreamed of… It began with Bella one day, "humphing" her way through the door carrying mountainous store bought bags of clothes.

"Alice?" I asked "How'd you guess?" She stated breathing heavy.

"She says that she got to see me wearing them at least once before I can take anything back."

A light bulb went off in my head as I got an idea. I rushed off to get my phone with video recording.

We ended up making music videos, matching each outfit with a fitting song.

I worked behind the scenes in different "costumes" encouraging and making her laugh.

Then emailed the videos to Alice. Literally seconds later the phone rang followed by a high pitched squealed giggle/scream upon answering.

"Oh my God Bella! I can't believe you did this! I am so proud of you! Tell Nicki thank you!" "You're welcome ma'am" I replied not knowing what to say.

Alice gasped followed by laughter along with others came through the receiver.

"Because you helped Bella, I'll forgive you. This once" she growled warning playfully. And that was my introduction to the "over caffeinated" pixie we all know and love….  
I would meet the whole clan in person less than a week later. 

3rd Person's POV:

(Phone ringing) "Forks Police Station, Chief Swan" "Hi Charlie, this is Esme Cullen. Edward and Alice's mother."

 _'Oh Great!'_ thought Charlie, he had mixed feelings when it came to the Cullen's'. "What can I do for you ma'am?"

"I was wondering if we could have Bella and even Nicki come over and stay at our house for a couple days."

The Chief thought for a moment, there was no way Bella (though she was technically an adult) much less Nicki stay in the same house as Edward.

He was about to say "No" when Esme spoke up and said "The boys and Carlisle aren't going to be here.

They're going on a camping trip this weekend and Alice would really like to have a sleepover with them. We're also really anxiously excited to meet Nicki."

 _'If Edwin wasn't going to be there, what's the harm? But Nicki-?"_

"Bella can go over and stay if she wants Mrs. Cullen." "Thank you Charlie, And Nicki?" She asked hopefully. "Nicki's not coming"

"Oh" Esme inquired, disappointed "Why not? Believe me Charlie, she'll be safe. Just as much as Bella. I promise" "I have no doubt of that Mrs. Cullen"

"Please call me Esme we're almost like family now" Charlie inwardly shudder at the thought of Bella marrying that….

"Esme" taking a breath in preparation of what "needed" to be said. He only prayed the kind woman would listen and not be offended.

"As one parent to another I must tell you… Nicki… through no fault of her own… doesn't do well at night… even here in her own bed.

See, she got special needs and that requires medical attention. Bells and I are having to take shifts caring for her. It wouldn't be fair to you"

"I understand Charlie" Esme's voice filled with compassion.

"Thank you, bye" the chief hung up, and buried his face in his hands.

"Goodbye" Esme said pushing the end button on the phone sighing. Well better to look at the glass half full. Bella was definitely going to be here.

Alice will be thrilled and Edward wouldn't have to worry.

Her heart went out to that poor girl and Charlie though. It was pretty obvious something dark and heavy was weighing on them.

Bella never said anything when she was here.

Edward did say that Charlie was suddenly more active after midnight and spent his time in down in the living room.

Making it slightly harder not to get detected being in Bella's room. ( _'_ He shouldn't be there anyway in my opinion). At least now we knew why.

Still the whole family wants to meet Nicki (and possibly learn about her knowledge of vampires) but she continually refuses our invitations. Strange.

But in light of what was just learned, her health was more serious then they originally thought. 'Maybe we should have a talk with Charlie…'

Alice POV:

"Alrighty then! (Squeal) everything's all set! Now that Esme's talked to Charlie.

I can go and pick up the girls! OH it's gonna be soooo much fun! First go and collect Nicki since Bella's shift doesn't end for a while…."

I drove my new yellow Porsche with pride and excitement down the road and parked in front of the Swan residence.

Knowing she was there, since all she does is school and home. How Boring!

That's the first thing to go (depending on her clothing choices. If she takes after Bella) I never met her though except for that one brief conversation on the phone.

Being a freshmen, having different class and lunch schedules,

we never saw her and she didn't stay after school long enough cause she "walked" home.

A rather foolish choice seeing as Victoria could still be lurking around. Though I've been watching her decisions as much as I can with those dogs blocking my vision.

However we're not going to think about that. Tonight is all about fun. Though Rose is planning on telling them something "important".

Which needs to be thought over.

I confidently marched up the house steps and prepared to open the door only to find it locked.

None the less I knew where the spare key's hidden so I let myself in.

(Looking back, I probably should've chosen a different method. As I would come to realize Nicki is not Bella.

But that's also a good thing because she like her "cousin" changed our family for the better.) I could never have predicted what happen next…

(Even if I'd taken the time. Damn last minute decisions.)

Nicki POV:

I had just come downstairs to get a glass of milk, having just completed my homework for the day.

When my instincts detected an unknown presence in the home but I ignored it.

Big Mistake! I opened the fridge and reached for the carton when suddenly without warning ice cold arms wrapped around my neck from behind and squealed.

I screamed and I screamed LOUD.

I didn't stop even as I heard a voice in the background telling me to calm down and that she was here for me to go with her.

I refused kicking and screaming as I was picked up off my "feet".

Less than a second later I was immobilized and gagged by a white hand as tears streamed down my face.

Before being thrown and strapped into the back of a car and sped down the road.

"LET ME GO!" I screamed at her over and over again. Praying to God that he'll make her stop the car.

"It's alright Nicki! It's ok! I have Charlie's permission. You're safe!"

"YOU LIER!"

I was cut off when the traffic light without warning turned red in front of us causing the pixie to slam on the brakes.

Quickly I took action, unbuckling throwing myself out the car door.

I tumbled into a ditch before picking myself up and running to the best of my ability into the forest.

My ears ringing with the pixie's shouting of "Nicki come back! I'm sorry! Please! I can't follow you! That's the treaty line-!"

My "legs" gave out less than five minutes later and I collapsed on the ground sobbing uncontrollably.

I heard soft pawing in the dirt beside me followed by animalistic whining. Looking up I saw a large sandy colored dog. No! a WOLF standing in front of me.

Wearing an almost human expression of wonder and concern in his eyes. He dropped to a sitting position and pawed me close to him.

I cried into his fur as his enormous massive head rested on my shoulder licking my neck in comfort.

Days could've passed and I wouldn't have noticed. For the first time in what seemed like forever. I was slowly finding a sense of peace and companionship.  
He groaned when we finally broke apart to discover we were not alone.

His pack had found us.

Strange! They were neither growling nor circling preparing to kill. They just stood there, glancing between him and me, each other and back again.

The tall black one, I assuming the alpha, came close and sniffed my salty tear streaked face while my wolf crouched in submission.

Then he surprisingly turned around and vanished into the trees. A moment later a tall young Native American man immerged where the wolf had been.

The rest of the wolves made room as he strolled past them, coming toward us. He was bare chested dressed in jean short cut offs. He knelt down beside me.

"Miss are you alright?" I shook my head feebly.

"No- No I'm not. Please you have to help me! I was nearly kidnapped from my home this afternoon! "

I implored him desperately, my wolf whimpered. "It's alright Seth. Nothing's gonna happen to her" The man assured him before directing his attention to me.

"What's your name Miss?" I shuddered taking a breath.

"Nicki- Nicole Swan" The man's eyebrows shot up. "Swan? Any relation to Chief Swan?" I nodded, "He's my Uncle".

At this news, growls erupted from all around me and I jumped.

The man put his hands out in a gesture of peace and the sounds of the pack quieted as one of the new wolves:

a chocolate stepped out of the circle and approached me. I shrunk back against sandy wolf or "Seth" as he was called.

Once again the man took control "Back off Jacob! You're scaring her even more!"

I looked away for a second to where the alpha wolf disappeared. "Nicki? He asked gently

"Do you have any idea who it was?"

I nodded shaking beginning to hyperventilate. Seth's presences surprisingly helped calming me down enough to answer.

"It was… a Vampire… with yellow eyes.

She mentioned something about not being able to follow because of a treaty".

The wolves bared their teeth and snarled quietly. "The Cullens?" "Yeah". The man tried to hide his disgust while trying to sooth me.

"Nicki, my name is Sam Uley. You're safe. The Cullens don't come here" I breathed a sigh of relief, then remembering something Charlie had once mentioned.

"D-Do you know a Billy Black that lives here in La Push?"

The chocolate wolf known as "Jacob" started to wag his tail like a propeller at my question.

"Yes he's the chief of our tribe" Sam answered. "Could you take me to him? Maybe I can use his phone to call Charlie?"

With such sympathy and understanding in his eyes. He looked up at Jacob and gave him a signal.

Like Blackie, Chocolate also disappeared and another boy took his place coming to join us.

"Hello Nicki, my name is Jacob Black. The real Jacob, this is my normal "form". Billy Black is my father.

I'm glad to meet you though I'm terribly sorry of the circumstances. It _won't_ happen again" he swore with such certainty. "Jacob" said Sam,

"You, Seth and I will take Nicki to Billy's and stay with her.

The rest of us will finish patrol then gather at Emily's. Move out!"

On his command the pack dispersed. I tried to stand but my "legs" wouldn't cooperate. Wordlessly, Sam lifted me up and placed me on top of Seth's back.

He took the left side resting his hand on my legs while Jacob took the right facing behind me so I wouldn't fall backwards.

Together we ran nonstop to a small red house with a ramp built off the porch.

Jacob POV:

 _ **Those Bloodsuckers have gone**_ _ **too**_ _ **far this time!**_

I was so filled of rage that I couldn't even be happy for Seth, Happy Go Lucky Punk.

He found his imprint. Despite my feelings for the topic, unless it was Bella.

I've tried to imprint on her so many times but nothings worked.

None the less I'm not going to give up. I can tell she feels for me, she's just got to admit it to herself.

Who knows, this incident could be just the thing to show her that her precious bloodsuckers aren't as perfect as they've led her to believe.

I'll tell her tomorrow when I spring her from the leeches' prison.

For now one step at a time and that means taking care of Nicki. She sure is pretty, sort of takes after Bella.

With her short dark hair and soft brown eyes. Maybe it's the family resemblance. She is after all her cousin and now a member of the pack.

Which we will serve and protect...

Seth POV:

Boy! What a day this has been!

Or even an hour! Just because I went for a walk to take a break from the monotony of pack life.

Don't get me wrong I love being a wolf. I just wish I could hear myself think at times.

 _Trust me bro, it's not all that interesting- Quil,and Embry_.

See what I mean? None the less I try to make the best of it and put on a happy face.

Right now I need to be strong for Nicki. Obviously the Cullens must have done something to her.

 _No shit! Sherlock! - Leah, Paul, and_ _Jared._

"Wow the three of you agree on something!"

(Silence then) _Don't remind me! – Leah._

Anyway we'll get this straighten out. This is abnormal even for the Cullens. I then tune everyone out and focus at the problem. One thing is clear…. **She** needs me. 

Nicki POV:

I begrudgingly got off Seth and entered the house.

Looking back to see him vanish into the trees like the rest. "Don't worry, he'll be back but this time as a human"

Sam explained as Jacob went down the hall to search for Billy.

The sound of a squeaky wheelchair could be heard moments later and a middle aged man came into view.

"Hello Billy" I greeted nervously "I'm Nicki Swan, Charlie's-" "Niece" he finished.

"Yes Charlie has mentioned you" His eyes flashed to my "legs" "Would you like to sit down? There is much to discuss"

"No thank you" I answered politely. "I was wondering if I could instead use your phone to call Charlie"

"Of Course" he obliged, "But we must talk after, It's important".

I rung the house but he wasn't there so I tried the station. I got him. "Nicki! Oh thank God! Where are you? Are you ok?"

As I started to shake at his simple questions trying not to panic over what happened now that I'm "safe".

A coppered hand took mine in his own and I instantly calmed, knowing who it was without turning around.

With a deep steady breath I began "Charlie…"

By the time I was finished the Chief was furious with Alice Cullen.

But quite relieved I was safe in La push with Billy.

He told me about his conversation with Mrs. Cullen and that Alice did NOT have permission to do what she did.

He also had half a mind to march over to the Cullens and demand Bella return with him.

That's when Jacob took the phone and explained his jailbreak plan to Charlie. It took a few minutes of convincing but he approved.

As long as this **didn't** become an occurring habit. He then wanted to talk to Billy.

After about ten minutes of back and forth, Billy put the phone down on the receiver.

It was decided that at eight o clock, Jacob would take me home and Leah would stay at my house overnight.

Then tomorrow I'd have my stuff packed and stay at La Push for the weekend at least until things got sorted with the Cullens.

With our hands still connected Seth and I made our way to the couch and sat down.

He was kind of cute.

His eyes were on my face, never looking at me with disgust or pity like they usually did.

Sam and Jacob joined us as Billy wheeled into the center. Little did I know then I'd submersed myself once again into the Supernatural and this time…

There was no turning back. 

I sat and listened patiently throughout the whole explanation.

By the end of it I was filled emotion. Such as Shock, Honor and Guilt.

"I'm sure you must have questions?" stated Billy.

"You can ask us anything you want" encouraged Seth, his eyes shining with excitement.

Deepening the guilt for what I was about to do.

"I am really flattered Seth, but I don't think this is going to work" trying to let him down easy.

"What? Why not?" exclaimed the poor boy.

"You heard what they said, "We don't have to be Boyfriend and Girlfriend right now if you're not ready? You're my imprint, I can be whatever you need.

Please give me a chance"

I felt my heart break along with him. But I must be unselfish so I'll tell him the truth and if he still wants me, we'll see where we go from there.

"Seth, it's not you. It's me"

He started to interrupt but I put my hand up. "Let me say this"

Receiving an encouraging nod I continued. "It wouldn't be fair to you, and no it's not because of my legs.

A few short years ago I made some pretty stupid choices out of pain and desperation. That I'm paying for now. My health isn't good, I'm sick.

Not contagious but my chances of a cure are very slim due to my heart problems.

You deserve someone healthy enough to live past their sixteenth year." Crickets could be heard throughout the room.

Then for the second time today I felt an arm wrapped around my upper body except this one was toasty warm and offered comfort.

I leaned into the embrace welcoming it, looking up into the soft dark eyes of my wolf.

I was quiet all the way home as Jacob carried me in his arms.

Seth trailing along beside in his animal form, his eyes never leaving me.

Things were changing so fast, it was hard to keep up.

But a long forgotten feeling I'd only felt once was awakening in me: Hope.

Have I gotten my childhood wish since foster care? I've been adopted!

The fact that I was sick didn't matter to any of them.

One by one they just hugged me even Billy (Though I had to lean forward so he could reach me.)

and promised to be there every step of the way, according to Seth.

The thought made me smile.

I was a part of a family and I belonged. I whispered "Goodnight to Seth" as we entered the driveway where the police cruiser sat in park.

Apparently Charlie was still in the dark about the Supernatural.

So it was probably a good idea for him not to see Seth like this. Jacob put me down and rang the doorbell.

The Chief opened the door and pulled me into an awkward hug before offering his gratitude.

"Don't thank me. It was Seth who found her, Charlie" "I'm still grateful, Ahh! Here he is!"

He cheered as human Seth joined the party.

Charlie reached out and shook that hot little paw of his saying that his father would be proud of him.

I don't remember much of happened next or what time Leah got here. The last thing I know was I took my meds and collapsed on the bed from exhaustion.

The next morning was in a word: Awkward...

For the past two going on three weeks I got use to waking up to an empty house.

Though I walked home, Charlie had arranged late arrival with the school to give me more time. So a bus would come and pick me up before nine.

Today I had Leah, the lone female wolf of the pack and Seth's sister. She'd slept on the couch after refusing Bella's room.

Yes, it's safe to say that Leah did not like "my cousin" very much.

She was undecided about me. She told me so but chilled out when I informed her that I definitely did not want or plan for this to happen.

That made her think, then I foolishly admitted.

I would have been alright to just stay home and do my routine if _"Cullen"_ hadn't done what she did.

That made her mad and this protectiveness came out surprisingly.

"Well they _won't_ be doing it _again._ You're one of us"

Pulling me into a hug and stroking my hair. She quickly broke away and looked me straight in the eyes. "If you tell anyone about my soft side-" I gave her a reassuring smile "Our little secret…." 

3rd Person's POV:

Gossip spread around Forks High so fast that Friday. Normally the excitement was for the upcoming weekend.

This day however there were two big topics to choose from:

First, according to witnesses Bella Swan was seen skipping school on the back of a motorbike clutching the driver.

A native local boy from La Push and her "supposed" boyfriend's family, the Cullens were not too happy.

Trouble in paradise maybe? But then it gets better- not even five minutes after the Chief's daughter bails.

The police turn up and who do they want? Not Bella but Alice Cullen!

Two policemen march into the cafeteria holding up their badges

"Attention everyone! We're looking for an Alice Cullen." The short pixie haired freak steps forward.

"I'm Alice Cullen, What can I do for you Officers?" she asks sweetly.

"Miss you're coming with us. You're under arrest for the attempted kidnapping of Nicole Swan" turning her around and putting on the cuffs.

The whole student body gasped in shock while a shout of "WHAT?" could be heard from her gorgeous blond, pale faced sister.

The cops then marched the stunned Cullen out of the building and into the squad car. Blondie bolted after them.

One of the talks at lunch were: "Man! I knew they were freaks from the start but I'd never though they'd do a thing like that"

"Poor Nicki, Bella get out while you still can! "There must be some mistake!"

The list went on and on.

One thing's for sure: Next Monday's gonna be interesting and Jessica Stanley better have the inside scoop! 

Alice's POV:

What a morning this had been! First Bella leaves with that dog, what am I going to tell Edward?

He's freaked out enough as it is with Victoria and now the Volturi on our backs about Bella's change.

I had just come out of the vision, finding myself in the back of a Police car driving down the road. Charlie wanted to see me, no doubt about Nicki.

I haven't been able to see her future at all since she disappeared into the woods.

Stupid Dogs! If only Nicki would have listened to me. I guess I shouldn't have surprised her like that.

But I'm not going to give up looking.

I promise myself I'll make things right… Soon I was seated in a chair in front of the Chief's desk.

Charlie's face was more serious and angrier then I'd ever seen him.

I'm starting to realize how much trouble I'm in because of my poor judgment. Thank god I didn't tell Bella about this.

What would-? No! Will she think of me?! Before I could panic anymore, Esme and Rosalie both charged through the door. "Charlie I am so sorr-"

"Chief Swan, Mrs. Cullen. Sit down please" He looked over at Rosalie.

"Young lady you can either, sit in one of those chairs against the wall and listen quietly or you'll have to wait outside."

Wordlessly, she took a seat. Charlie cleared his throat and focused his attention on me. "Alice…" the disappointment evident in his voice.

"Honey, I am very surprised and disappointed in your choice of action. I never thought you'd do something like this"

"I know Charlie I didn't think-"

"You got that right. Alice you DO NOT go into a person's house uninvited and take them against their will. It's not only wrong but also illegal.

I thought your _parents_ (looking at Esme) would have taught you that." I bowed my head in shame, unable to face my mother.

"She _knows_ better Chief Swan" She was right, I did. Looking up I tried to explain

"After Esme called you I assumed it was ok to come by your house and take her-" Esme put her hand on my shoulder,

"Alice I called your cell phone but you didn't answer. Charlie said the Nicki couldn't come because she has some health concerns at night."

Oh God! If I could be sick to my stomach then I would be.

The image of that poor girl staggering through the woods getting worse as her medicine wore off.

Those stupid mutts! Blocking my vision!

"Have you heard from Nicki, Charlie?" asked a concerned Esme.

He didn't comment about his name. "Seth Clearwater found her in the woods and Jacob brought her home last night.

She's spending time down in la push," He sighed in relief before addressing me.

"She said she begged you to stop the car and let her go but you wouldn't was true, I didn't listen.

I can still hear her screaming pleas in my head. "Believe me Chief! I'm very sorry. I feel so guilty for what I did. It won't happen again."

For the first time Charlie's face softened at my sincerity.

"I know you are but you need to be held accountable for your actions…"

In the end it wasn't so bad, I'm on what you'd call probation:

I can't drive my yellow baby for the next three months because they took away my license and I've got community service.

It could have been a thousand times worse though. As it turned out I had leniency due to Nicki as a favor to Bella. I didn't deserve it.

Esme signed me out.

Later in the house garage I was stroking the glossy yellow hood of my Porsche thinking "What if Edward takes it back?"

but that's the least of my worries as a nosy motorcycle and a familiar scent came into view in the rain… Bella. 

Nicki's POV:

Friday and Saturday past by too quickly for me.

Seth and I talked eventually coming to an understanding.

I was in no way ready to take on a relationship other than friendship. He said that was fine with him, he didn't want to put any pressure on me.

Once that was out of the way, it felt good to have someone to talk to.

Friday was spent getting to know one another and meeting the immediate family.

Leah was pretty much the same only crabbier after she got off patrol. A mystery for another time. His mom, Sue was very welcoming and excited for her son.

It helped that she didn't stare at my so- called "legs."

Saturday I was introduced to the fellow imprints of the pack. Kim and Emily were behaving like older sisters, very understanding of my disability.

Claire was just adorable. I'm not big on toddlers up to age six. But she was sweet and funny to watch.

They kept me company while Seth did patrol. All in all it was a pretty nice break from my humdrum life. The sun even came out.

Then Sunday it got rocky and I'm not just talking about the weather… 

Charlie had called me on Friday night at the Clearwaters.

He was fine having me stay there as long as I bunked with Leah, took my medication and called him in the event of an emergency.

Over protective was an understatement, he probably wouldn't have agreed if it hadn't been for Billy and Sue.

They both supported Sam's decision for me to stay in La Push. He as alpha wanted me on safe grounds until he dealt with the Cullens.

Apparently they were in double trouble. Since Alice not only broke the law but maybe violated their treaty and the pack protects its own which now included me.

That was the first major difference between me and Bella: I lived and had grown up in the real world where people's choices have consequences

and there's a price to pay. She on the other hand lived in a fantasy life. Where if you were supernatural, good looking and rich. You could get away with murder.

I'm mean why else would she take over moussed hair gel back after the crap he pulled.

I held my tongue of course but the mind reader could tell I wasn't fond of him.

Speaking of Bella, she texted me and said to meet her at the treaty line but not to tell Jacob seeing as she wasn't ready.

Crazy if you ask me, all he was trying to do was give her the truth about her options despite his so called prejudice for her lover and his kind.

Seth carried me to our destination before setting me down and greeting Bella.

Hurt could be seen in her face as I stood on one side and her on the other. "Why?" she asked brokenly, "Why what?" "Why did you get Alice in trouble?"

I turned to Seth "Could you give us some privacy?"

He nodded, "Sure" before retreating into the bushes and resuming wolf form. I turned back to Bella, "The cops picked her up at the school.

Do you know what you did? You risked their exposure. What if the Volturi find out?"

Calmly, I answered "I did not ask Charlie nor those policemen to come and make a scene in public" She nodded still upset.

"But why did you tell Charlie?" I blinked at her incredulously, "Why would you ask me such a question? Alice broke the law.

She, the Cullens, like everyone else in this town needs to be held responsible for her life choices."

Bella sighed, "Look I know she can be a little out there and crazy at times but what she did she did out of fun"

I gave Bella a hard dark look that made her cringe and step back, "It stopped being _fun_ the moment she grabbed me and I screamed.

She _should_ have _STOPPED_ right then and there. But she _didn't_ instead she dragged me out of my house.

Picked me up, through me in a car and drove _like a bat out of hell_ down the street ignoring me pleas. She only stopped because of the _red light_ and the _treaty._ "

"I see your point, she went too far but that still doesn't-" she began with the excuses, but I had _had_ it.

"But _nothing_ Bella! She committed a crime _knowing_ what she was doing was wrong! She _could've_ quit but she _chose_ not to. The Cullens want to live in our world?

Rule number ONE- _There's price to pay_ _._ One you can't weasel your way out of _._ " Bella was quiet for the first time,

catching the double meaning behind my words as her eyebrows shot up. "You think that Edward-?""Exactly, you've become so obsessed with him.

That you don't even see the destructive path you are on." "Edward's not dangerous Nicki" "I don't give a shit about "Hair gel".

I heard a snicker in the bushes across the line. "I'm talking about _you_ Bella. You've strayed so far from the girl I knew and looked up to.

It makes me sick to see you like this. "Like what?" she asked surprised and irritated. "Like someone who hasn't got a _brain_ in their head."

I heard a familiar growl but I ignored it. "Which I _know_ you do. It was relevant when you were seven years old lying in a hospital bed.

And the doctor came in telling Renee you weren't getting better and the chances of survival were slim.

You sat up and got on your feet, marched over and said "Just watch me". You defied the odds against you that year and came out on top. Just look at you now ….

Eleven years later and your still here" "Thanks to Edward and his family" Bella put in, I nodded. "Ahh yes! Help is good I'm finding out.

But the trick is not to let it cripple you, stay strong in your beliefs otherwise you'll lose yourself… like now. That's also what Jacob was trying to say"

Bella stood in silence, expression thoughtful. "Another thing about Alice, I did ask Charlie to be merciful with her sentence.

The penalty for attempted kidnapping as a minor is five to eight years behind bars.

She's of more use to the community keeping Victoria out of our hair don't you agree?" Bella laughed ruefully, "Yes she is…You coming home?"

I smiled, "Soon, after Sam has a talk with the Cullens regarding the treaty." "Tell Sam that we're here…" said a voice on behind on Bella's side.

I looked up as she turned around to see Dr. Carlisle Cullen and the rest of the clan emerge from the trees halting at the boundary.

"No need" answered Sam's gruff voice, he was human though the rest of the pack were wolves. Vampires on one side, Werewolves on the other.

Bella and I in the middle.

We were surrounded…. 

I suppose you're wondering what happen next so I'll give you the skinny. After several minutes of awkward Sam finally took the lead.

Normally the repercussions of what took place would be severe.

Not like someone's going to die but more specifically everyone that is Cullen related would have to move and never come back.

However in light of our current circumstances regarding the red haired leech, Victoria and listening to me just then. He decided to let them off with a warning.

But strongly emphasized no second chances. Should something of this nature occur again and I'd return to Charlie's on Monday.

With a promise that they'd be watching for I was a part of them now. As the pack and I turned to walk away Bella called out asking me to stay.

I assured my brothers I'd be ok coming to stand at the line crossing my arms.

"Yes?" "Alice has something to tell you" Then raised my eyes to the pixie waiting. "Nicki- Nicole I am really really sorry for what I did.

I was just so excited at the thought of you coming over. That I did not stop to think or predict the outcome. And I know now that that's no excuse for what I did.

You're right, if we are to live amongst humans we must play by the rules. I promise you. You're safe to come home. I won't surprise you like that again" There was an air of sincere tone in her voice. "Thank you, I appreciate it". 

Edward POV:

Nicki was a mystery that was for sure.

Actually both of the Swan girls surprised me with their differences. A year and a half ago my world changed forever when my angel appeared in my life.

With no self-preservation skills and an undying persistence of curiosity, Danger Magnet. It killed me to leave her like it did.

I wanted (still do) her to have a chance at a normal happy life with marriage, children and grandchildren. But for some strange reason she wants me.

Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled _no_ ecstatic! that she even consider me after what I did. But the unselfish part wants more for her.

If only I could get her to change her mind about turning. I can't bear to condemn her pure soul. Nor have her ruin her life.

I sure don't want her with that dog because of how dangerous they are. Sometimes I wish I could hear her thoughts. Nicki on the other hand,

never once seemed to fawn or drool over me. Like other teen girls tend to with the exception of Rosalie.

I expect humans to at least have some interest because it is our monstrous nature to attract our prey. But this girl… nothing.

You can tell she defiantly has a history with our kind. But whenever I try to pry into it by what Bella calls dazzling.

She starts singing in her head Shania Twain's "That don't impress me much!" or thinks "that's my business not yours".

She's a quiet girl and keeps to herself like Bella but she's not her or so I learned after she told me off that first time I inserted my input.

Since then I've stayed back and observed from a distance. And came to the conclusion she's actually a nice person.

She's sad a lot of the time and takes things very seriously. So I'm not surprised that she called the cops on Alice.

But with her speech to Bella I cannot help but wonder…. 

Nicki POV:

Late Monday night/early Tuesday morning at around 2 am I woke up with a craving for ice cream.

The medicine I take supplies cravings at unusual times. As I just finish closing the freezer taking out a pint of cookie dough.

I notice "Hair-gel's" presence in the room. "What do you want?" I ask mentally. "Just to talk" he answered out loud. "Bella's upstairs in her bed?" "Yeah just left her.

Figured now is a good time as any to talk to you." "Say what's on your mind" I said wanting to cut to the chase.

"I know that you don't like me and you see my family as spoiled rich kids that feel they are above the law" "And you're not?" He sighed,

"You're right when you say entitled but we do have a sense of right and wrong. Moving on, what you said to Bella the other day really affected her.

She talks about it in her sleep" "I'm glad it came through. She needed something to wake her up" Edward frowned, "What do you mean by that?"

"Bella has always been a self-sufficient woman at heart.

She needs her independence, the freedom to decisions in her life and you're not helping with your obsessive, manipulative and controlling ways.

Like for example: Bella _is_ in love with Jacob Black and she needs to come to a conclusion and make up her mind without fear of your retaliation." "I don't man-"

"Yes you do, like when you broke her last year. All for the measly excuse of needing her to have a "Normal" life." "It's not stupid"

"Yes it is, you don't even know what normal means." He raised an eyebrow, "Tell me, what do you think it is?" he asked.

I took his ice burg hand in mine and marched to the laundry room and pointed. "Normal is a setting on your washer or dryer. It's not life" Edward looked unconvinced,

"None the less, putting that matter aside. I can tell you truly care for her." "I love her" "I love her too and because I do, I want her to be the best person she can be.

You treat her like a mindless yes man then that's what she'll become." Not wanting to argue, I bid him a goodnight. Put the ice cream back in the fridge and the spoon in the sink.

Shut the light off and went to bed.

The next day as I was jog/walking home from school thoughts entered my head. Despite myself I couldn't stop thinking about Edward, and No!

Not in a romantic sense. He's not even my type. He was a 109 going on 110 vampire, stuck in a seventeen year old teenage body.

Which led me to question his mentality. He is smart but incredibly ignorant and naïve to the way life is for us mortals nowadays. Hearing is one thing,

seeing is another? Maybe I could show him the truth. Just as I reached the porch, my cell went off alerting me of a new text.

Strange, Seth had to patrol at this time of the day. It was from Alice Cullen, she must have gotten my number from Bella. She once again apologized and then asked

if we could start over by inviting me to their house on Thursday after school. Thinking long and hard over it, I texted her back that evening. I agreed but we were

doing it on my terms: Bella would drive, both parents would be there. And they'd have to talk to Charlie and Sam first. She was so excited that I said "Yes".

So that's how I found myself loaded into Bella's truck at 4:00 on that dreary afternoon. We sat in silence for most of the drive then my cousin spoke up

"It's going to be alright Nicki. You'll see, they're really nice people. You're going to love them. Just give them a chance. They are after all… Edward's family.

It's important" I couldn't quite suppress the shudder I felt rake through my body, Bella noticed. "Sorry I didn't mean to put pressure on you.

I really hope things work out so we can all hang out together. You're already a part of my world concerning La Push, it'd be nice if you were in this one too"

All I could do nod saying "We'll see", reserving the right to judge. "Please…" I started to get the hint that something was going on. "Hair –Gel purposed didn't he?"

"His name is Edward and yes he did though I said "No" he keeps pushing. But that's beside the point.

What is it with the main people in my life outside of the Cullens holding a grudge against the love of my life?"

"I can't speak for Charlie and Jacob but for me…" "What please speak your mind?" "Okay… the Edward I see is an incredibly immature young man who has an extreme

case of OCD fueled by a warped vision of human life and the world we live in for this century.

It has absolutely nothing to do with his species for whom I have utter most respect. Now I know that he's mister perfect halo in your eyes and that's fine.

But please realize that not everyone is going to share your view and if you don't accept that you will be continuously disappointed.

I promise to at least tolerate him for your sake but the second he decides to dictate _my_ life and how it's "supposed" to be run.

I'll have no problem telling him to shove it". I heard whooping coming from the house. I had been so distracted that I missed the fact we'd been parked in the

driveway for the last minute. The front door opened and two boys came burrowing down the porch steps towards our vehicle followed by the rest of the clan.

Though the topic of our previous conversation hung back looking at me. "Hey Bella –boo!"

the tall hunky one greeted engulfing her in a bear hug before facing me grinning "Welcome Nicki-roo! I'm Emmett, and thank you so much for what you just said!

I think you'll fit right in here!" before I too received one of those massive hugs.

With all the energy and excitement radiating off him it was hard not to feel Getty and jumpy.

Though I think Jasper might have something to do with the feeling. Speaking of which the empathy sent a powerful welcoming sensation my way.

I turned myself around in Emmett's arms facing Jasper. Then smiled and raised my arm doing a salute, remembering his military background.

Surprised, he grinned saluting back "At ease soldier," Sometimes I wish that I had Alice's power for as it turned out,

those two men along with the wolf pack would become my saving grace.

Once Emmett placed me back on the ground. I slowly and humbly walked over to the former Major Whitlock, not wanting to spook him.

Startling gasps could be heard all around, Along with: "What is she doing?" "Bella, didn't you tell her that Jasper has the weakest control?" "She could get hurt?"

"Nicki STOP!" Same words I heard when I faced an unstable horse in one of my foster homes.

They doubted both of us and yet we survived, coming out on top. According to a dear departed friend of mine, "I have a talent for taming beasts".

Poor Jasper looked so uncomfortable, I had to help him. I collapsed at his feet, wrapping my arms around his legs. As I felt him kneel, my hand touched his throat.

Using a power I never thought I'd use again. "Is that better?" I asked looking up into his face. Jasper's shocked eyes were as big as quarters, his mouth wide open.

"Wha- What did you do to me?" he asked with wonder. "I reduced your thirst level, cause honestly, it was sky rocketing.

Of course, taking on everyone's thirst will do that. You looked like you could use a break" I whispered to him.

The whole time we were talking the entire family plus Bella gathered in a circle around us. Hanging on our every word…

I cleared my throat, "Could you guys _please_ back up? Some of us are slightly Closter phobic." They actually listened to my surprise and granted my request.

Though Alice ran up to check on her mate. "Sorry, it was just a shock. How are you feeling Jasper?"

asked Dr. Cullen, Edward's "adoptive" father/creator according to Bella. "Better than I have in a long time" he confessed,

hugging Alice while still staring at me with amazement as was the others. "Oh God! Everyone please _stop_ looking at me. I get enough of that at school,

just act normal" I implored. Then Esme, the matriarch of the family, approached me slowly and gracefully with a smile. "Welcome to our home Nicki,

it's a pleasure to have you finally here. I am so sorry about what happened before. Can we start new?" she asked, her eyes filled with hope.

I couldn't help the small grin that appeared on my face. Esme reminded me of Abigail, may she rest in peace.

"We can try" I answered her, reaching my hand out which she shook happily. "Nice to see you Doctor" doing the same greet as I did with his wife.

"The pleasure is all mine Nicki, please call me "Carlisle". Glancing over I see that Bella found Edward and was watching our interaction side by side. "Edward,"

I said acknowledging him. "Nicki, what … HOW did you do that?" he demanded of me. "Not now Edward, this meeting is about getting to know each other"

I pointed out politely, getting ready to meet the next member of the family. "Exactly, now talk" he pushed.

I sighed, "You like stories, right Edward?" "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Well… Once upon a time there was a real skinny underweight dog who got the crap beat out of him by his owner so he ran away. As he entered an alley he got trapped when the chain he dragged got caught in the fencing. Next thing you know a snot nosed kid came up and started jabbing him with a stick. Cornered, the dog started growling but the boy ignored it and kept going. Suddenly without warning, the dog lunged-! What do you think happened?" I asked,

"The kid got bit." "Exactly! You are the Snot Nosed Kid…" Hair-gel's eyebrows shot up, "Your words are the Stick…and I'm the Dog"

(pointing to myself with my thumb) "So what are you gonna do about it?" "Back off" "Thank You" I nodded walking away from trouble to face the stunned Cullens

and my cousin before Jasper, Alice, and to my surprise _Rosalie_ burst into applause.

Followed by Emmett's loud whooping only to be promptly scolded by Esme, "Emmett!" While Carlisle stepped forward, placing a wintery yet gentle hand on my

shoulder. "That was a very artistic way to get your point across Nicki, but would it have been easier to just say "Please Stop?"

"Normally yes, but sometimes looking at something in a different medium gives you a clearer picture" I responded.

I could tell my reaction shocked the Doc. It took him a human minute to come up with something to say before settling on "That's very true" obviously impressed.

With Rosalie it was more like a small nod to show acknowledgement along with an exchange of names.

We weren't going to be best friends anytime soon but at least it wasn't hostile. Judging by Bella's face that was more than she ever got when they first met.

Then finally… Alice, I wasn't crazy about her touching me after what happened last time. None the less I approached her and Jasper slowly.

This time however she seemed to understand my body language and paid attention. I have a feeling my story lesson to Edward also gave her insight to me.

I smiled cautiously, keeping my distance. "Alice…" "Nicki…" she answered in welcome. All in all, not a bad meeting of the family in light of the circumstances... 

In the next two weeks that followed the vast majority of my time was divided between school and La Push. I hardly saw the Cullens apart from Edward.

Hair Gel seemed to finally gotten the hint that he wasn't gonna get anything out of me without earning my trust first.

And step one: Respecting my boundaries. Seth and I were growing closer, took turns leaning on each other for support.

Then one day when he had double patrol duty and I found myself walking home. When suddenly out of the bushes and trees came Jasper and Emmett.

I waved and whoosh! The two came up on either side of me. "Nicki-roo," said Emmett in a sing along voice. "Where have you been hiding?"

"I haven't been hiding, I've been busy." "Okay but when you have a chance, Please come over! I _need_ someone to help me team up against Edward."

"You need help to do that?" questioned Jasper, raising an eyebrow. A giggle escaped my lips, these two were hilarious. "I don't do it to annoy him on purpose."

I confessed, "I can't help it, he's so pushy. Demanding answers when he doesn't know me from Adam's off ox. Sure not the best way to earn my trust.

But like I said, I'll tolerate him for Bella's sake." "And us?" asked Emmett, I leaned on him playfully. "I'm undecided"

"Edward like the rest of us is only concerned that our secret will get out" Jasper pointed out. "I told him on that first day, you've got nothing to worry about from me.

I've known and kept the secret going on seven years this December. I'm not going to start blabbing now"…

"It would tarnish her memory" I added under my breath. Both boys looked at me, surprise etched in their faces. "A story for another time…but I will tell you this,

you're a lot closer to knowing the truth then your brother. Just be patient" The rest of the walk was spent getting to know more about each other.

Taste in movies and books, music stuff like that. My interests were a lot different than Bella: fairytales, fantasy/adventure. Not so much romance…

Like Robin Hood (the one with Kevin Costner), Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. Once I mentioned LotR, Emmett got excited as a kid in a candy store.

Apparently the big lug broke into the theater and repeatedly watched it over and over after hours. Never got caught though except by Esme and Carlisle.

I loved all kinds of music from different eras. My favorite instrument was the guitar. Years back, I'd been given a second hand one from my foster home.

I practiced day and night for hours. It never left my side until two months ago when I sold it to a pawn shop in Seattle shortly after I got out of the hospital.

To pay for the bus ticket to come out here. Charlie had picked me up from the bus stop in Port Angeles after I called him.

Yes I was still sore at him for abandoning me like he did but I'd come to realize that that was a decision my so called "Mother" made on her own.

Charlie had no say in it nor a way to contact me. It was pure luck that I found him in the phone book.

I found that I could almost relax and be myself talking to these two. But a life lesson I learned was never get too comfortable with people. Supernatural or non. 

Later that night Charlie and I were seated at the kitchen table eating leftovers going over the schedule for tomorrow.

I had an appointment for one of the hospitals in Seattle with Dr. Janson.

Check up on my "legs" and my heart. Charlie was trying to get the day off so he could take me when the lovebirds came waltzing in.

Rather than say "Hi" and go up to Bella's room. Edward came into the kitchen.

"I couldn't help but over hear Charlie but did you say you're going into Seattle tomorrow?" "Sure you could" I muttered, he ignored me and continued.

"I don't think that's a good idea due to the killing spree going on there." Charlie cleared his throat,

"Thank you for your concern Edward but I'm a cop and I can handle it. Besides Nicki needs to go to the doctor and get checked out."

I blushed embarrassed, Hair Gel was the last person I want to share personal information with. "I see…" he processed.

2 am on the dot my stomach felt the need to empty its contents in the unused mop bucket. Another reason for going to the doc.

I was having reactions to the medication. As I leaned over it again, a cold hand held my hair back. "It's just me" he whispered in my ear before I could panic.

Turning the light on coming face to face with Edward. "So it's a serious checkup?" I blinked, "All doctor's appointments are serious" "But you're really sick?"

"Yeah and your point is…?" He sighed, pinching his nose.

"Look… I know you are not fond of my "words of wisdom" but please listen to me: It's not safe in Seattle right now. The death tolls are a result of vampire activity.

I'm trying to keep you and Charlie alive. So I am going to see if one of us will take you down there…It's not controlling, it is a safety issue: Believe me!"

I sighed, laying back down. "As long as it's not you, I'll play" " _Thank you_ " he breathed with relief…

I don't want to know how he did it but Hair Gel worked his magic and Charlie was called into work. My mystery driver was all arranged, I was packed and ready to go.

At the designated time I put my coat on walked out the front door.

Locking it as I went, then turned around facing the street to see a red BMW convertible pull into the driveway.

And who was in the driver's seat?

Rosalie!

"Well, are you coming?" She asked impatiently. "Yes!" I jumped into the passenger's seat buckling up as she sped down the road.

I was so glad I'd packed the bag in my purse.

Luckily half way there she was forced to slow down due to traffic.

I think that was the first time Rosalie took notice of my face which I'm guessing was either pale or green and pulled over.

"Sorry, I didn't think-" "It's … f-fine" I said trying to get my sea legs.

Honestly, I hadn't had it this bad since I was pregnant. A few minutes later I was much more stable and we were on the road again but this time Rosalie drove slower,

aware of my needs now.

Later on after the hassle of locating the parking garage and finding a space we entered the hospital.

As I filled out the paperwork in my seat, I found myself impressed with how in control she was of her thirst. "What?"

I just shrugged before my name was called "Nicole Swan?" "Yes," I said standing up and walking towards a nurse with the clip board in her hands.

Rosalie was at my heels. The Nurse raised an eyebrow "Are you family?" "Yes, she's my sister in-law" I answered before she could speak. "Sister in- law?"

she whispered in my ear as we rounded the corner following. "Hair-Edward and Bella are practically married as it is, sharing a bedroom" 

I asked Rosalie to wait outside when the doctor came in with the test results from a prior visit. I had to be strong now…

It was bad news, and with it, died the slight glimmer of hope I'd been holding on to.

Wanting to be alone after they hooked me up to mobile I. V. Dressed in a hospital gown, I walked down to the maternity ward.

This hospital took in little ones who've been abandoned and forgotten for one reason or another. I could relate, I was one of them.

I also happened to volunteer here every time I came as I waited for the medication and progress report pertaining to what was left of my lower limbs.

Today, I was caring for a pair of newborn twins: Toby & Tucker.

Their mother gave them up due to their down syndrome saying "She dealt for "normal" children not "retarded." That's a load of crap!

One of the reasons why I hate those words. Anyway I was slowly swaying back and forth with Toby in my arms while his brother slept in his bassinet when Rosalie

took me by surprise from the back.

"Practicing for when you have your own litter of pups?"

I sighed, placing Toby with his brother, not in the mood. "What do you want from me Rosalie?"

Looking at her straight in the eyes.

"I have had it up to here with your brother and his remarks concerning human life!" I hissed quietly, trying not to disturb the babies.

"Now you're going to start?! WHY? Are you really that much of an upbeat snob?! I have nothing to offer you people!"

"You have everything" she muttered quietly,

"The ability to grow old, have children, grandchildren. You can have it all!"

The moment she mentioned children, my eyes grew moist as I thought of Noah. I blinked wiping the tears away before they could start.

"You're wrong," I corrected, "You're wrong on both counts.

"The reason we're down here is _not_ because of a _flu bug_ or anything of that nature. It was to see if I stood _any_ chance of a _heart_ transplant…"

Rosalie's eyes widen in shock, "And the answer: is "NO"… I've got until mid-January they think."

I took a deep breath, just admitting it out loud made it seem real.

"And for your further education:"

I continued, "In order to have a baby: You _got_ to have the equipment, preferably ones that _work_.

(Which I lost the night of my accident in addition to my legs.) Do you see my point?

There's absolutely no reason for you to be jealous of me. In fact, it should be the other way around.

And no, Vampirism has nothing to do with it: I grew up with no stability. Living with strangers who only saw me as a meal ticket.

When I was hungry or I wanted clothes, I went out and got a job.

I did everything from delivering the paper, groceries to raking the leaves and mowing the lawn.

When the home I was in got overcrowded or got to be too much. I was uprooted and the whole thing started all over again.

Ran away several times only to have the cops bring me back.

You and Edward have _got to_ understand that we live in a different world and 98% of today's youth don't have the Norman Rockwell idealistic life.

Since 9/11 I've had to say goodbye to foster brothers and sisters who've employed in the service, went overseas and never came home."

Tucker woke up just then, he was hungry. A bottle was already prepared on the table. I picked it up, giving it to him.

"This is as close to motherhood as I can get" I smiled sadly.

I hadn't really noticed but as I talked, the snow queen's eyes were glistening with venom tears that would never shed before she bowed her head shamefully.

"Do you want to help?" I asked a minute later when Tucker's twin awoke demanding a change.

Rosalie nodded mutely as I past Tucker to her while I took Toby.

Turns out we were a pretty good team, the twins were quite satisfied when we handed them back to the Nurse hours later.

Then we went back upstairs to the Doctor's office.

but this time Rosalie stayed right with me, she insisted!

They couldn't do anything meager right now today. So they gave me some new medication that would supposedly make things easier with no harsh side effects.

But Charlie and I would need to make an appointment and soon to install a pacemaker.

In addition, they said I was "healing" nicely as far as my "legs" were concerned.

The ride home was quiet and much smoother until Rosalie spoke up "I am _really_ sorry Nicki. I truly am, if you ever need a friend to talk to… I'm here"

I could tell she meant it, "Thanks Rosalie"

. "Rose..." Huh? "Everyone in the family calls me "Rose" We were silent for a moment before "Nicki… if you ever need something.

You let me know, alright?" "Well there is one thing…" I trailed off,

"What?" "Could you not tell anyone about this just yet? I'm not ready for some _people_ to know" She nodded,

"Meaning: Edward?"

"I don't need another thing for him to jab me with" I sighed.

"Oh he _won't_ be doing that, he'll have to deal with _me_!" she _promised_.

As the red convertible pulled into the driveway and parked behind the police cruiser. I went to grab my bags and get out when I found myself engulfed in an arctic hug. "I'm here" she whispered walking me to my door, before she and the car disappeared down the road…

End of Part One


	2. Chapter 2

_**Many thanks to all who've Read, Followed and Favorited this. If you have any questions or comments? Please leave a review and I will try to answer.**_

 **To Esrelda Snape:** **I got your review and I sincerely hope this helps.** _ **  
**_

 **Please note that the following contains some Christianity Views. I figured it to be acceptable. Given the Backstory S.M gave Carlisle.**

 **FINDING HOME:**

 **(Part 2)**

A Twilight's Eclipse – Breaking Dawn AU Fanfiction

By Fantasy Writer

Nicole "Nicki" Swan's POV:

It had been almost a full week since that fateful trip to Seattle with Rosalie.

I hadn't had much to say since I told Charlie the news. I was still trying to wrap my head around it and so was he.

The real challenge though was telling Seth, a wolf cannot live without his imprint.

Which only makes this ten times worse. I couldn't do that to him but it appears I have no choice.

My source of relief these days apart from the pack was the words of the Bible and my Christian music.

During my time behind bars I not only went through detox but I found Jesus Christ and have been a follower ever since.

I am sinner and that means "I'm not perfect and I make bad decisions"

But like the good book says "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to _forgive_ us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness"

I have to remind myself of that daily along with:

"Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you" and "For if you do not forgive others, neither will your heavenly father forgive you"

Which is why I try so hard not to hate Edward Cullen or others who wronged me, no matter how mad I get.

I'd just rather not mess with them but I kind of have to for family (aka Bella.) I just…don't do vulnerable.

And with Hair Gel, I feel cornered and forced to justify myself.

So I get angry and defensive like I've always done. Sad truth is though, I'm getting tired and I don't want to spend my last 9 nine months fighting.

I'm gonna need _all_ my energy to keep my heart beating. What to do? … What to do…?

I had taken to wearing headphones with my portable disc player to bed. Listening to "Amazing Grace" as I drifted off.

So I almost didn't hear the doorbell ring and Charlie answer it at ten o clock at night.

He had fallen asleep in the chair during a rebroadcast of the game. "Dr. Cullen..?" he yawned before stepping aside.

"Please come in, what can I do for you?"

"Charlie," the vampire doc greeted entering the house.

"I apologize for the late hour, I just got off shift at the hospital. But I wanted to talk to you about something pertaining to Nicki"

Charlie was fully alert now as he ushered the doctor to the kitchen table.

"Would you like some coffee?" he offered, noticing Carlisle's dark eyes. "No thank you Charlie, I'm going straight home after this"

"Okay" said Charlie, pulling out a chair to sit on.

"What's on your mind Doc?" Carlisle took a seat across, coping him.

"Bella mentioned the other night when she was over that Nicki wasn't doing so well when Alice asked about a slumber party for the girls.

So I thought I would come check on her.

I understand it that Rosalie took her to the Hospital in Seattle for a checkup on her legs and she had a reaction to the medication she was taking?"

"Yes she did" said Charlie, "and they prescribed some new meds. They seem to be agreeing with her"

I could hear the forlornly tiredness in his voice. Carlisle knew there was something else but didn't address it.

"You know, Bella also said that you've been working extra shifts.

So if you need someone to watch Nicki at night? You can call us or she can stay over? We'd love to have her"

"Dr. Cullen..."

"Is this about what happen before with Alice?"

"No," Charlie waved him off,

"That's in the past… Nicki right now needs to be in a stress free environment.

Though she tries for Bella, the fact is that she and your boy, Edward do not get along…"

"Charlie, I promise you: Edward though opinionated," I heard a quiet "Hey," from Hair Gel's perch upstairs.

"Is very much a gentleman." he concluded, I snorted in disbelief.

 _Believe it when I see it_

"Look… I appreciate the offer Dr. Cullen. But it's not going to work… I have a lot of _guilt…_ when it comes to Nicki.

I haven't always done the right thing. Some stuff… I had no control over. I want her to have the best life she can…"

I think Carlisle was either starting to catch on or knew but wanted it confirmed.

"What are you saying Charlie?"

"Nicki's dying and she's only going to get worse as time goes on" he broke down sobbing.

I heard a chair squeak as it was pushed back.

"I am so sorry Charlie" It took a minute for my uncle to compose himself

"It's her heart… I'm working those extra shifts to pay for her medical expenses. Bella doesn't know yet and Nicki wants her privacy.

This is all too much to take at once" he sighed.

I fell asleep not long afterwards but I did know that Hair Gel knew my secret… for real this time.

I just never assumed his actions that took place the very next afternoon after school.

It started out like any other time walking home. I was alone happily listening to the song birds and crickets chirping in the nearby woods.

I just barely got in putting my bag down when there was a knock at the door.

I opened it leaving the screen coming face to face with Edward. "Bella's not here, she went shopping with Alice I think."

I know, I actually came to see you"

"Why?" I blinked, suspicious. "We need to talk," I couldn't believe this guy.

"Say whatever it is that you're going to say Edward. I don't have the energy to fight with you. Then _please_ go away"

"Aren't you going to invite me in?" he asked/demanded.

"No cause when Charlie's not here and Bella's not here, this is my sanctuary. And you are not welcome" I told him.

He shifted awkwardly for show. "Look… Nicki this is really important."

I huffed, "Fine, I'll be right out in the backyard" not wanting to cause a scene for the neighborhood.

I went into the kitchen to get a glass of water. All of my earlier walking left me dehydrated. I headed out the backdoor and he was there.

"You wanted to talk? So talk" I halted on the porch, just short of the first step.

He sighed, "We got off on the wrong foot somewhere along the line, Nicki. I honestly don't know where it started -"

"It started," I told him.

"When you tried to "dazzle" _private_ information out of me. After I _told_ you that you had _nothing_ to worry about as far as "the Secret" is concerned.

Violating my privacy and showing _no_ regard for boundaries" I said, walking down the steps.

"Then after that disaster with Alice and I came over to your house…

Edward, that meeting was about making amends and starting fresh. You decide dazzling won't work.

So instead, you _demand_ answers from me when I help Jasper relieve himself from something very painful.

Like I _owed_ you!" I was livid at this point.

Marching up and poking him in his chest: "I owe you _nothing_!"

Before retracing my steps backing away. Taking a deep breath, calming down I said.

"Finally, you try to project and cram your own beliefs down Bella's and my throat about Human life. Which is a load of crap since you're not even one…

At least not now, in this time period. I understand it was different back when you were growing up:

Both parents married, Dad went to work while Mom stayed home with the children. Food on the stove, fire in the hearth.

But I can a grantee you, It wasn't perfect.

There was WWI going on. Times were harsh especially for the poor. Business were closing, one whole big mess!

You lost everything unless you were better off in high society, even then you lost some. Then came the Spanish flu as you know.

Nowadays: we have so many divorced parents. Orphans in the foster system. Young adults joining the service, even out of high school so they can get a paycheck.

Starvation, out of work, the list goes on.

Humanity is not a Utopia and you're such an Inyo ramous if you think otherwise.

Another thing: when you say "Normal life" I got news for you pal, what is considered "Normal" for one is _not_ for others.

There is _no one_ on this entire _planet_ that has had the exact same life and its experiences… We're ALL different and we lead different lives…

And we each have a God given _right_ to _choose_ our own path. Something _no_ Man _nor_ Creature has the right to take away…

Yet some do, and it's _wrong_!

Bottom line is: I am not going grovel and kiss ass, so you will tell me:

 _Who_ I should be and _How_ I should act.

Take me or leave me. I am not dirt under your feet, because I know who I am and that's not about to change…" I stated, taking a breath.

"Now, if you can accept that and want to get to know the _real_ me? You are more than welcome to _ask_ questions and _be_ the so called "gentleman" your father claims.

Otherwise _please_ … Stay away from me. Because I _really_ don't need this crap on top of everything else I'm going through."

I concluded my speech turning around and marching up the porch steps, holding on to the railing.

"Oh" I said as a thought came to mind. "And I'm not just shooting off my mouth here.

These "Words of Wisdom" about people are actual life lessons I had to _learn_ in the school of hard knocks: Prison"

Edward raised his head from where it had been hanging in shame. I took a long deep breath, shifting the gears in my brain for this next part.

"But… we've seem to have gone off the track here. Say whatever it is you are going to," waiting.

"I really messed things up with you, didn't I?"

"Yeah, you screwed it" I agreed, leaving the bite out of my words.

Hair Gel blinked in surprise, clearly he never got this reaction. "I'm not Bella, Edward. I don't sugar coat or mince words. I will tell you how it is"

he considered this, "Then… if I have done all the things you've said, I must be a bigger monster than I thought."

"Your words, not mine. I will tell you this though, it is our _actions_ not our _species_ that define a monster. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.

In spite of that, he offers mercy and grace. Should we repent and come to him."

He scoffed, "Our kind is beyond that."

"You can stand there snort all you like for it is your right. But if you could, try to think on this:" I offered,

"If Vampire kind has been around for thousands of years like they claim. Why weren't they washed away in the Great Flood that cover the Earth?

I believe every creature has a soul. If they didn't, they wouldn't be alive.

As it says "Earth to Earth and Dust to Dust. From dust you were formed and dust you shall return.

Food for thought."

Wow! I actually stumped Edward Cullen! I could tell by the look on his face.

"Yes, I'm a Christian but I'm not a Bible thumper. I believe in free will and that's the last I'm going to speak to you on the matter unless you ask…

Again we've gotten off the subject, what did you come here to say?"

"I just wanted to tell you that I am really sorry for your illness and I would try to make things easier for you.

You see… Alice, Esme and _Rosalie_ really want to have you over at our house from time to time, even Jasper, Emmett and Carlisle agree.

But it won't happen unless _I_ stop upsetting you.

So I came over to find out what it was every time a fight breaks out between us.

Now that I know it's because of something that I say or do. I will disappear when you're over, probably go on a long hunting trip. So you won't be stressed out"

I hit my forehead with the palm of my hand. He didn't get it!

"Just… _Respect_ my privacy, _Let_ me _be_ me and _Don't order_ me around" putting it as simply as I could.

Hair Gel blinked as I saw understanding finally dawn in his eyes behind the self-pity…

Edward's POV:

Nicki has one of the most complex minds I've ever read. She truly believes everything she says and despite her thought " _He didn't get it!_ "

I got the message loud and clear.

I was just so overwhelmed and trying to sort through everything that had been spoken in the last five minutes.

My super-fied brain got stuck what she said about vampires surviving the flood and having souls.

It's making me question everything that _I've_ thought or believed in.

So here I stood… In my house, facing the wooden cross hanging in the hallway that Carlisle's father carved.

Bella and Alice should be back from shopping any time now. Downstairs I can hear Rosalie's excited thoughts " _Bravo Nicki!_ " then out loud,

"Hey Emmett," "Yeah Rosie?" "You and Jasper owe me $20!" she sang, "She broke him, just like I told you she would."

I heard the front door open and close with a bang followed by Alice's squeal of joy.

She blurred up the stairs, coming to stand in front of me while practically jumping up and down

"Did you do it? Did you talk to her? Did you reach a truce? When is she coming over?!"

"Alice, please give Edward a chance to breathe. I want to hear this too!" said my Bella as she marched up the stairs to join us.

I didn't know what to say or do. Both my angel and my sister looked at me with such hope and anticipation in their eyes.

"What's wrong? What happened?" asked Bella,

I guess I didn't do a good job with my expressions hiding my thoughts.

"What did you do now, idiot?" Alice sighed.

"Alice…" I began, "Nicki agreed to come over as long as I kept her conditions"

"More conditions?" asked Bella in disbelief. "What now?"

"I have to: Number One- Respect her privacy. Number Two- Let her be herself = don't try to change her. And finally Number Three- Don't order her around."

The two girls blinked in surprise while a laughing riot erupted downstairs from my other siblings.

"So _really_ , how did it go with Nicki?" asked Bella that evening when we were alone in my bedroom.

"I take it from what you said earlier, she has yet to succumb to your charms. Which is unbelievable in my opinion" she said, touching my arm flirtatiously.

"For any - _mortal_ to resist you" She added, trying to make me smile.

I think she would've said "anyone" but then Rosalie came to mind. "Come on, I haven't seen you smile today since school.

Was talking to Nicki really that bad?" I didn't respond. Bella shook her head, "My cousin's an idiot"

"No Bella!" I said, jumping off the bed.

" _I'm_ the idiot. Nicki is beautiful and smart. Smarter than me, I swear. Even with my hundred years of "experience."

Bella just sat there with her mouth open for a minute, "What?"

"Bella…" I said taking her hands in mine and getting down on my knees. "Love, I am not perfect" she blinked in confusion, "What do you mean?

Yes you are, you're perfect to me". "Bella…I've spent my entire life both as a human and vampire seeing the world through rose tainted glasses.

But today was a revelation, Nicki punched through the lenses.

Took a sludge hammer to the frames and bulldozed the remains into the ground."

"What? Explain to me."

"Bella… I grew up _privileged,_ with everything I could ever need or want due to my dad's job as a lawyer.

I never suffered through hard times until the Spanish influenza. Then after I joined Carlisle, I never had to worry. I was taken care of.

I've _never_ had to scrap for _even_ the most basic needs. So I absolutely have _no_ right putting "Humanity" up on a pedestal like I've been doing…"

taking an unnecessary breath, "Bella, Love… I also want to apologize again for leaving you last September"

"Oh Edward-"

"Please let me say this: You were right, you _should_ have had a say in it. I thought I was leaving to protect you and give you a chance at a "normal" happy life.

But I was wrong… I wasn't _giving_ you a chance, I was _forcing_ you. I took away y _our free will_ to _choose_.

I've learn that _that_ is something _no one_ has the right to do. Also the word "normal" applies to what serves an individual, not a whole group.

I guess decade after decade of reading adolescent minds for six hours a day, five days a week. It all started to mesh together and I just assumed that's how it was.

I've said it before and I'll say it again:

I'm not going to let this thing with Jacob Black put a wall between us. So I'm trusting your judgement" Bella was flabbergasted.

"Th- thank You Edward… Wow! If Nicki was able to help you come to that conclusion? I guess she not that much of a snob."

"Again with the assuming Bella, I don't know her story but Nicki's not a wide eyed innocent doe.

It's clear she has a past and not a good one.

Like Jasper, she has scars but hers are more mental. I _do_ know she spent time in Jail and that's where she learned her "wisdom."

Bella blinked, "Really? She's never said anything to me" I shrugged. "Nicki likes her _privacy_ , or so I've learned the hard way. _When_ she's ready, she'll let you in…"

Nicki's POV:

It had been almost two days since the Hair Gel verbal beat down. Bella hadn't been home either, pixie Alice kidnapped her for a sleep over.

It was actually kind of _strange_ to be without what is considered "Normal" here. I also found myself without Seth these days.

Apparently the red-headed vampire that has been stocking these parts was in revenge mode. Surprise, surprise, she was after Bella cause _Edward_ killed her mate.

Big Time No No! You _do not_ mess with someone's mate. But apparently the Doofus had brought it on himself for going after Bella in the first place.

Oh what a tangled web we weave! Then to top it off!

Sometime when nobody was home, an unknown vampire had broken in to the house and stole a shirt belonging to said cousin.

Jacob was able to pick up his scent and so both he and Seth along with the rest of the pack are doing double runs. _Seth_ …

Though he and I talk on the phone every day, it's not the same as in person.

The last time we were physically together in the same space was the night of the bonfire where Billy and the elders shared the tribal legends with the pack,

their imprints and Bella!

She and I had to leave though shortly after. I leaned up against Seth, relaxing comfortably. Our hands intertwined. La Push and its people had become my safe haven.

Jacob drove us to the treaty line, Bella asleep in the front and I stretched out in the back (once I removed my lower "legs.") We were there before I knew it.

My Cousin after she woke up and Jake explained everything, ran to Edward who was waiting on his side.

It took me a minute with Jacob's help to reattach before I too reluctantly headed in that direction. Once I crossed over then came the surprise!

Hair Gel himself approached and _politely_ offered to carry me. I respectfully declined,

I needed to save whatever dignity I had left but I would take his arm if he was offering. So there we were…

the vampire walking slowly alongside me to the car as I clutched him for balance. It had been an off day anyway and I wasn't doing so good.

I got to say it sure felt nice to have him _helping_ this time. Maybe there's a gentleman in there after all…

So here I am alone in an empty house. Normally I wouldn't mind that but today I feel… what's the word…? _Lonely_. Maybe it would do me good to get out for a while.

I think I'll take a walk… Grabbing my backpack, I started on my usual route but something keeps telling me to go this way…

Oh Geez! Where am I? Standing in the Cullens driveway. They've got the upstairs window open, I can hear Alice:

"Just a little more blush Bella and we're almost done" I couldn't help but chuckle

"Alice, if you haven't turned her into a silk purse yet? Chances are you are never gonna!"

"Nicki?!" Oh shit she heard me! Faster than I could turn to run she blurred out to the balcony. "What are you doing here?" she asked excitedly,

"Just a… taking a walk" "Well come on in! Bella's waiting for you upstairs!"

I smile nervously backing up, "Thanks but I got to go, it's getting dark soon" "Nice try, Nicki"

I hear a voice behind me before finding myself engulfed in Emmett's arms. The voice belonging to his accomplice, Jasper.

"Nicki – roo! You holding out on us? Now that certainly won't do!"

The next moment I can comprehend, I'm plopped down on the Cullen's couch in the middle of their living room.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you not to bring livestock into the house?" I said pulling out a G. I. Joe figurine from the pillow behind my back.

"Emmett" came Alice's voice, "I need your help to reach the big box on the ladder in the closet. Jasper can watch her till you get back"

He nodded, leaving Jasper to his own devices.

I looked between him and the distance to the front door. "Don't even think about it Nicki" he warned.

He could take me, I saw it in his eyes. Suddenly my eyes caught sight of an object in the corner, a piano.

True it wasn't a guitar but a piano was the first instrument I learned to play. Wordlessly as if in a trance I got up off the couch and was transported back in time.

When I told Rosalie of my past, I said that I didn't have any stability which was true to a point.

My most stable years were spent in the house I'd lived in from the time I was 9 ½ to twelve. That's where I was now… Abigail's standing by the bench.

Smiling warmly, beckons me to come and practice.

"I have a surprise for you today, dear" she says. She bought me a medley book of sheets listing Disney music.

I sit as my hands feebly find the keys and I start to play "Part of Your World". As I play I am somewhere between the past and the now.

I dedicate this song as a love letter to trusty ol' legs, May they rest in peace.

Once that song ends, I find myself swept away into the unknown as I think of Bella and Edward and "A Whole New World" pops into my head.

Bella…. That thought alone brings me to deal with my own goal and its journey. "Go the Distance"

I find myself using Disney to express my thoughts and I don't mind.

Then I start to think of Seth and my beloved pack and "Colors of the Wind" comes out of my fingertips.

My thoughts turn back to Abigail as I play my heart out lost in her memory.

Taking a break from Disney, I start "River flows in You" by Yiruma as I go over our shared motherly moments when I needed her the most.

I start to ache when I think of how it all ended and my promise "My Heart Will Go On".

Not wanting to dwell in sadness I go into the song I learned when I found my faith "You Raise Me Up" and once more into Disney with "Circle of Life"

The final song that comes to mind is one I haven't heard before but it could be Disney-like. It definitely fits me. I start singing as I play.

After I sing the last line I hear Emmett remark "That's just fine kiddo! The cold never bothered me either, we can go out and play in the snow anytime you want!"

"Emmett!" Rosalie scolds, elbowing him. I spin around on the bench fully aware of _where_ I am and _what_ I've been doing.

The _entire_ family plus Bella are all reclined on the sofa _watching_ me! "How long have you guys been sitting there?"

"Oh! Ever since you started playing the first notes on _my_ piano" answered Edward, Bella curled up on his lap.

Starting to panic I said, "Oh Edward! I am so sorry! I had _no_ idea it was yours. I wasn't myself!" …At least my _present_ self, I finished in my head.

"I -!"

"Nicki! Nicki, calm down. It's okay, I understand. Mind reader remember?"

I breathed a sigh of relief, somehow I knew that he wouldn't reveal anything private without my _permission_.

For he remembered our little talk and was respecting my wishes. "Anyway regardless, you have quite the musical talent.

Have you ever tried to play something classical?" I grimaced,

"On my last attempt, Beethoven's Fifth turned into Beethoven's 4 ½." They all laughed.

Esme's POV two weeks later:

The saying "Time sure flies when you're having fun" was true. This is what we wanted all along, for Nicki being able to come over without trouble.

It just took time, that's all. Rome wasn't built in a day.

When Bella first mentioned Nicki, I thought that was nice of Charlie to open their home to her

and even more intrigued when it was found out that she knew of our kind but _chose_ not to say anything.

We still don't know the story yet but like Edward said "When she's ready, she'll let us in" Just be patient… that's the key.

She's not a bad child, I think she was abused though and her tough exterior is how she protects herself. Like Rosalie.

Speaking of which, Rose is very protective of Nicki when she visits our home.

She will literally get up and place her in Emmett's lap. Snapping at Edward warningly before he pushes her too far with his questioning.

(It's nowhere near as bad as it once was, thanks to her "talk".) Or "rescue" her from Alice when she's had enough.

I don't know what took place on that trip to Seattle but it bonded them.

I love my children very much but there are times when even I've got to admit they can be very pushy.

So it's nice to see these different sides to both Nicki and Rose…

Any way things have been going so well that I'm on my way to the sheriff's station to speak with Charlie about a possible sleepover for the girls.

I already have the wolves' permission after meeting with them last night at the treaty line.

It wasn't easy, I had to swear that no harm would come to Nicki on our watch. I have a feeling that Charlie's not going to be a walk in the park either.

I opened the door to front of the building and go in. Finding Charlie at his desk, buried behind a mountain of paperwork.

"Charlie" I greet, "Mrs. Cullen?" he says looking up.

"Please have a seat" gesturing to the chair in front. "What can I do for you?"

"Is it Bella?"

"No" I said waving my hand. "She and Edward are just fine, driving back from Port Angeles.

I actually wanted to talk to you about Nicki" Charlie raised an eyebrow, "What about her this time?" "Well as you know," I started.

"Nicki and Edward have reached an understanding and she's been spending time over at our house when she isn't at La Push. So-?"

"You want her to spend the night, right?"

"Yes, we'd love to have her" he heaved a heavy sigh,

"I guess your husband didn't… tell you" I blinked out of habit, "Tell me what Charlie?"

"Mrs. Cullen-"

"Esme" I corrected. "Esme… Nicki has heart failure and she is going to die"

My jaw dropped as images of that poor girl laughing and giggling alongside my children. She seemed so… so full of life. I can tell she's had a hard life and now…

My silent heart broke. "When?" I couldn't help but ask.

"The Doctors say after the New Year. Please don't say anything, Nicki's private person. Bella doesn't even know."

"Of Course Charlie" I promised him, I'm going to ask Carlisle though if he can look into her case.

Maybe there is something we can do, I think to myself as an idea came to mind.

"Charlie," I began. "If Carlisle can get the night off and be there in case something goes wrong, would you say yes?" He sighed, "If you can get him to agree…"

Nicki's POV:

It finally happened, I'm going to spend the night at the Cullen's house with Bella.

Alice shrieked with excitement when she got the "ok" from Esme. It was conditional though, not on my terms this time but Charlie's:

Dr. Cullen _had_ to be there. Of course I can't blame Charlie for being protective. He knows I still don't do well at night, after all he's up checking on me.

I have to encourage him to go back to bed whenever I have a cough attack and I'm stable.

Luckily, Rosalie was picking me up this time. Remembering our trip, she knew of my needs and drove slow.

"They know, don't they?" I asked getting in the car. She nodded grimly, "Charlie told Esme and Carlisle. It was the only way…"

I sighed, the last thing I needed right now is pity. "Does anybody else know?"

"Jasper, Emmett, Alice and Bella are still in the dark. They are going to find out eventually,"

I bent my head down. "Nicki?" Rosalie asked,

"Wouldn't it be easier to just come out and say it?" "To tell you the truth Rose, I've been thinking of doing that very thing. I just…

am not ready for all the looks and comments that comes with this. It's only been in this last year. Apart for once brief moment of time as a kid.

That I've been accepted and treated as a person with thoughts and feelings like everyone else. "

Despite my best efforts some tears leaked through and ran down my cheeks. "Oh Nicki,"

Rosalie pulled over to the side of the road, leaned over and gave me a wintery hug.

"It's going to be ok, you've got me, your dogs, Charlie, Stink Brain. Now Esme and Carlisle, and once it comes out.

Jasper, Alice, _definitely_ Emmett and _Bella_ will have your back." I laughed, drying my eyes "Did you just called your brother "Stink Brain?"

In the end it wasn't _so_ bad, I agreed that I would tell but not tonight. I didn't want to ruin the party. Whether it was the "Family's" or "Alice's" I know not.

We pulled in the driveway and I just _barely_ got out of the car when Alice came bounding up excitedly. "You're here! We're finally doing it!"

She wrapped her arm around my shoulders, guiding me towards the house with Rosalie trailing behind.

"Come on in! Bella's already here, she didn't have to work today. It's time to party!" she sang, upon entering. "First up on the list of fun is…Makeovers!"

Soon I was placed in a chair alongside Bella as Alice went to town. I couldn't believe how much makeup products she had:

Tweezers, Eyelash Curlers, Eyeshadow, Mascara, Blush or "Rouge" as she called it. Lip balm, Lipstick, "The Works" in all different kinds and styles.

She could put "Covergirl" out of business. It started out fine and dandy until _Alice_ decided that my eyebrows were too thick and needed to be trimmed.

"Alice d-Ow!" I exclaimed, "Okay…that's enough, I think I'm good. _Moving on_ …"

Once it got to hair, I'd reached my limit and an idea come to mind.

3rd Person's POV:

"Ow! Alice there's a person under the hair." "Sorry Bella but it would be easier if you didn't move your head so much.

Just look at Nicki she's being perfect" she said, going back and forth between the girls in the vanity.

"Right?" That's strange! Nicki had been quite verbal the whole time during makeup, now nothing. "Nicki? You ok?" Alice asked, turning around the swivel chair.

Coming face to face with a wigged manikin head! "NICKI!" "What?!" came her voice from the other side of the house.

Bella was just dying in her chair before getting up and following Alice.

Their hunt led them to the kitchen where the other house occupants watched as a bald headed Nicki was taking orange juice out of the fridge.

Pouring a glass to take pills on the counter, she said "I said you could do my hair, I didn't say about being under it while it took place."

Alice's eyes grew wide, "You…you don't have any hair?"

"The wig is made of the real stuff", popping the meds in and taking a drink. "But as for physically growing it on my person, I haven't had _mine_ since my early teens"

Carlisle stepped forward away from the crowd.

"What happened, if you don't mind me asking Nicki?" That story, she felt almost comfortable telling. With certain precautions of course.

"I cut and sold it for money, one day it was cut too short. So I took a razor, ultimately rendering myself bald.

I was arrested shortly after for a… something else and it started growing back in prison only to die off once I started chemo for an illness I was diagnosed with.

That wig was made and donated to the hospital prison by "Locks of Love."

Now that I'm off the chemo, my hair still hasn't grown back yet so I make do" "It will soon, little peach fuzz will start to develop in patches" he assured her.

"Damn girl!" exclaimed Emmett, "No legs, No hair, don't you have _anything_ that's yours?" "I do have my original nose…"

Nicki's POV:

After the crowd dispersed, and Alice herded Bella back upstairs to the vanity.

I was pulled aside by Esme and Carlisle. Once I told them I was fine just waiting for the pills to kick in.

They said okay but take it easy and _be sure_ to let them know if something doesn't feel right. I did say that I needed a break from all the "girlie" partying.

So the boys and Rosalie "kidnapped" me for a movie in the living room while Esme went to tell Alice to tone it down a little for my sake.

(I think Bella appreciated it too.) I don't remember when I fell asleep but I came to with the sound of Alice's voice:

"The Graduation Party is only a week away. Oh it's going to be so much fun!"

"Alice?!" Bella exclaimed exasperated, "What? It will be," "Yeah that's what you said last time" "It will be different," Alice rolled her eyes.

"The party and the attention won't be focused on you. Other people will be there, and so will Nicki" Wait… "Party"… "Teenagers"… _Teenage Party!_

 _Me:_ _NOOOOOOOOOOO!_

I could feel my poor sick heart begin to pound faster in my chest.

"Now, if only I can figure out _what_ she _did_ with those _fabulous_ clothes I bought her?"

Alice continues, "Because the stuff she wears is… Ugh!"

"Alice!" My cousin scolds in disbelief.

"Sorry Bella, but even _you_ don't dress that _bad!_ I'm going to try again, she'd better keep them this time so the party can be _perfect_!"

I can't….I can't! I _just_ CAN'T!

My heart's going into overdrive and my breathing is getting shallow. My body is not letting me take deep breathes, just short little pants.

"NICKI!"

I find myself in Rosalie's arms but the only sound I hear is the pitiful thudding ringing in my ears.

Just before I lose consciousness I make out the shape of Dr. Cullen hovering over me and feel the plastic of an oxygen mask go over my nose and mouth….

"Nicki?... Nicki?"

My eyes unwilling flew open. To my surprise I find myself not in a hospital room.

I am lying on the side of a soft comfortable bed with a portable oxygen tank placed to the right of me.

Looking at the room's décor, I detect this is Carlisle and Esme's before my eyes find the speaker, or should I say "speakers":

Esme and Rosalie. "Nicki you're awake? How do you feel?" asked Esme. "Drained," I replied "Carlisle says you had a panic attack," Rosalie explained.

"Do you remember what happened?" I nodded weakly,

"Alice started talking about a teenage party you guys were having and that _I_ was supposed to come…"

I took a breath, "Esme? Can I talk to Bella and Alice please?" "Sure sweetie, just take it easy." She got up and disappeared out of the room.

Rosalie gave me a look, "Everyone knows now, even Bella. Carlisle just got done explaining everything. I groaned, Oh great! More pity!

Charlie's on his way over too…"

We were saved from further conversation when the door creaked open and a concerned Bella and Alice made their way over to the bed.

I gave Rosalie's hand a light squeeze, letting her know with my eyes that this was something I needed to do on my own.

"I'll be right out here if you need me" she said before exiting and closing the door behind her. I turned my attention to my visitors.

"Nicki… I am so sorry" said Alice, for perhaps the second time I'd known her she was totally serious.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" ask Bella, "You have your own life going here Bella, with its own troubles. You don't need mine.

Besides I hate the looks of pity. It's not like I'm dying tomorrow, I've still got time left. I want to enjoy life while I can."

Alice perked up, "And what better way to celebrate life than with a party! Oh Nicki! It's going to be perfect! I'll help you with your hair and your clothes-!"

"Alice, Alice!" I said, "That's very thoughtful but I will _not_ be _going_ to the party"

"What do you mean "not going?" I said I'll help you! Come on! Give me one good reason!"

"I'll give you _two_ of them!" starting to raise my voice.

"I'm trying to stay _clean_ and _sober_ alright!" Alice blinked, not expecting that reaction.

"What?"

"You do not take an alcoholic to a bar. You do not take me to teenage parties. For I smoke and I drink, getting high.

For that is how I survive and have survived in the past at these things. Now I am sixteen months sober, you want to help me? Support my decision to say "No!"

Bella grabbed my hand, "You don't have to go"

"Nicki?" said Alice, capturing my attention away from her. "I would never _ever_ willingly put you in danger like that. You always have the right to say "No!"

I breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

After a moment or two of silence. I spoke up again, "Another thing Alice" "Yeah?"

"I want you to know that I really appreciate the gesture of the clothes. But, I _can't_ afford that lifestyle of $200 pairs of shoes and pants.

Now that you know of my illness you should also know that Charlie is drowning in debt, trying to pay off my medical bills.

Since the insurance won't cover, we're paying for it ourselves. The house has been put up as collateral and Charlie's even dipping into his own retirement"

Bella's eyes widened, guess Daddy's been keeping her in the dark about that too.

"I've thought about getting a job but Charlie won't let me.

So I've been taking and selling those clothes you've got me to a thrift store for money to pay for the house expenses and groceries.

I've spent my entire life shopping at bargain places and thrift stores. As much as I would want something nice, my needs are worth more.

Please try to understand…"

Alice's POV:

Poor Nicki, I had no idea it was this bad.

I feel so ashamed, in all my ambition. I once again forgot to think about her and how she feels.

I can't look into her future either since she's around those dogs so much.

I can tell this is a big shock for Bella too.

There has to be something we can do…I've got it!

I'll talk to Carlisle and Esme to see if they can speak to Charlie about letting _us_ pay for Nicki's medical or at least loan him the money.

They shouldn't have to _lose_ their house just to _pay_ the doctors. Despite what she says, Nicki should also have at least _one_ nice outfit to wear but this time I won't go expensive.

I'll see what Sears and Old Navy have to offer….

Bella's POV:

Nicki… God! I can't believe Charlie would keep this from me. True, I been so wrapped up in the Jacob and Edward situation.

Plus keeping an eye out for Victoria and what she's planning but still! I had a right to know! And nearly everybody has been keeping this from me!

Just looking at Nicki now, I cannot help but notice how frail and weak she looks and how hard she's been trying to hide it. I know one thing:

I'm _definitely_ pitching in my earnings from work at Newton's. I wonder if Jacob and the pack know.

They must have for Nicki spends more time with them then anyone. Seeing how close she and Seth are.

The way he looks at her… I've seen that look before… on Sam whenever he sees Emily… Oh God! Seth _imprinted_ on Nicki! And if she's dying that means… Poor Seth!

He's gonna be like I was when Edward- …

and this time there's no coming back from it… "Nicki?" I asked, she turned her head towards me.

"Have you ever thought about becoming a Vampire?" "She sighed,

"Once… a _long_ time ago. I can see where you're going with this Bella, and the answer is "no".

"What?" I replied, "Why not? It would help you, you could be around for Seth." "Bella, when Seth imprinted on me.

My life wasn't just mine anymore, I was officially initiated into a family.

Their thoughts and feelings count and Vampires are their number one enemy and threat.

No matter how much you may _want_ the Pack and the Cullens to get along, it is ultimately fighting against nature.

So the thought of me becoming one of them… it wouldn't be good.

Besides, you've already got enough trouble just dealing with Jacob and his thoughts about _you_ turning and joining _this_ family."

I have to admit she was right about that.

 _Jake_ … if only I could make him see. "The treaty says "If any of them bites a human, it's over."

Nicki finished, "Which is totally unfair as it's _my_ choice!" I couldn't help but exclaim in frustration. "Rules are rules Bella, as I have said

"There are consequences to every action." You should know that having visited the Volturi."

My jaw dropped along with Alice's. I never told her about – "How? Where did-?"

"Something from another life… A talk you're not ready for. Once…" Once what?" "Once you've make a decision… A final one regarding Edward and Jacob.

Of _who_ you're going to be with" Stunned and a little offended, I said "I have… I've chosen Edward"

I was given that _dead_ hard look of hers that I remember seeing _that_ day at the treaty line. "No… you haven't"

What did she mean by that?

Jasper's POV:

The mystery that is Nicki, keeps growing bigger and bigger.

As I cannot help but listen downstairs. Though she's only fifteen, her emotions and words are in a word: "Heavy".

Full of Regret, Self-Loathing, a slight sliver of Peace and Want. When she speaks, it's the truth that falls from her lips. It's almost like… dealing with myself.

That's it! She's a soldier! Why didn't I see it before? While she hasn't fought in a war or anything of that sort. It is pretty clear she has been fighting…

The Battle of Life. And it has definitely taken its toll.

I can feel the evidence in how tired and weary she is. Yet she doesn't give up! She going to continue on until…

I have a feeling that her story is meant for Bella.

To teach her something like she's done for Rosalie and Edward. I can only hope when that day dawns I'm around to hear it…

Nicki's POV:

I was house bound for nearly two weeks with the exception of school after that little episode with my heart.

Charlie came and picked me up not even ten minutes after I finished talking, He drove me to the hospital with Carlisle trailing us.

I spent the night in observation to make sure I was stable. Once I got checked out the next morning I was free to go.

Seth was sitting on the front porch steps, waiting for me when I got home.

Such a Sweetheart, he even carried me from the car into the house, placing me gently on the sofa.

He held my hand in comfort as I went over what happened last night. He was surprised to hear that it had to do with a party.

He then asked why I never said anything before down at La push at the bonfire, weeks back. I said that was different because I was surrounded by _family_.

People that I knew could trust and feel safe around. Despite the supernatural tendencies. Things in the world of Bella have had a major breakthrough!

It started the night of the infamous party after graduation.

True to my word, I didn't go but there was _plenty_ of talk afterward from Hair Gel and Bella that night in her room:

Apparently Red head decided to get smart and create a plan that _actually_ might work in her quest for vengeance. It was stupid, and by stupid I mean _illegal_.

Hopefully she will get busted and not us! She'd created an army of newborn vampires to sick on the Cullens to keep them busy while she went for Bella (and Edward).

Spilt up they wouldn't stand a chance, the entire town of Forks wouldn't either. They needed help, which they _got_ in the form of my pack.

For the first time ever in all the histories I've read that, Vampires and Werewolves were on the same team to in order to kill the enemy. I just hope it works.

As much as I don't like the thought of my Seth endanger, I understand it.

Though they say he isn't going to be fighting, I wouldn't put it past Vicki-leech. Jake has a special job for him dubbed "Cell phone".

Keeping track of the battle through wolf telepathy, he's going to stay with the lovebirds.

While the Battle is going on, Charlie and I will be tucked in _safely_ down at La Push. I check the clock, its 5 am.

Bella and Edward haven't been back yet from watching Cullens and the Wolves fight training.

All I can say is… "Good Luck,"

Well it happened… the day of the battle has come and gone. Now it's time to survey the damage.

Charlie, (who had just return from fishing with Billy. He heard the howling!) And I were at the scene when the pack brought Jacob in.

He was really buggered up, battered and bruised. Swearing like a sailor. Having grown up in the environment I did, it didn't faze me.

When the Boy's in pain, the Boy's in pain. They covered what happened claiming it was a motorcycle accident. Then Carlisle showed up to tend to Jacob.

I insisted on staying when Charlie left. Knowing that Bella was soon to make an appearance, I told him I'd go home with her.

Once he'd gone, I got the _real_ story:

Jacob stepped in to help/save Leah after she decided to take on a newborn by herself and got crushed when it got its arms around him.

He was healing too fast thus making the bones heal in the wrong places. The solution according to Carlisle: Re-break and a line them in the correct position.

While that was going on I met up with Seth. He was totally energized and pumped up after what had happened at the campsite with Bella and Edward.

I was right!

Vicki-leech and her partner tracked them down and went for the kill. But obviously didn't succeed.

Hair Gel finally ended Red Head, while Seth handled her associate "Riley". When I found out what he'd done, I soccer punched him in the arm.

"Seth you idiot! That's for putting yourself in danger!" Then I kissed him on the cheek, "That's for doing the right thing," He blushed.

Complicated, but such is the nature of our relationship. At the end of the day, we're here for each other. When Bella arrived, I knew what was coming.

I prayed that Jacob would be strong… Carlisle left as she entered, we exchanged glances as he got in his car and left.

Seth and I gather with the others outside the door, listening. Others had expressions of shock and anger, I just nodded. It had happened…

She's made her choice.

I felt my heart break with empathy as I heard Jacob's words:

"He's not as perfect as you think… A least I know I did everything I could… I will continue to wait for you…"

Bella: "Until my heart stops beating…"

Jacob: "Maybe… even then"

Oh No! De JA vu! I couldn't even _look_ at Bella on the ride home. When we pulled into the driveway, she said.

"Edward asked me to marry him again, this time I said "yes,". I started to get out of the truck, "Congratulations."

She grabbed my hand pulling me further back into the cab, causing me to slam my door shut. "What?" I asked, "Please understand Nicki!

This was a hard thing to do, to let Jake go, he's been my best- but I've chosen Edward! He's my soulmate, he's my everything! Be happy for me!"

"I am, Bella" I said, honestly. "But, I'm also looking at the big picture" she looked at me confused, "Yes, you've made a choice…

The real question is though… Are you going to stick to it? … Are you fully prepared to _let_ Jacob _go_ and live his _own_ life?" To that she had no answer.

This time when I exited the vehicle, she made no move to stop me.

The next day while Hair Gel and my cousin sat down with Charlie to get his blessing for their upending marriage, I made my way down to La Push.

I was stopped by Alice's yellow Porsche. She'd gotten it back early along with her driver's license for good behavior and being exceptional in community service.

Today had been her last day working as a busboy (person) at the Lodge. It had been quite comedic listening to her rants when she got home.

Having found whatever sort of dirt and gunk that had collected under her pedicured nails after shift.

"Nicki!" she squealed as she pulled up alongside me as I walked. "Where are you going?" she sang, "I'm headed down to La Push to check on Jacob."

"EW! Bel-Nicki you are always there with those dogs! You need to come over to our house,

so I can take your measurements for your dress to wear at Bella and Edward's wedding!" she shrieked, "Aren't you excited?!"

"Ecstatic,"

"Anyway I need you there and not smelling like a dog." I sighed, "Alice, if Emmett, God forbid! In his foolishness, stuck his hand in a meat grinder and got hurt.

You'd be there for him in a heartbeat. Now, as for the matter of my dress… I will talk to Charlie and see if he'll allow me and Bella to spend the night on Friday.

You can do it then," I suggested, trying to be reasonable. Alice having coming out of a vision, smiled "Great! See you then!"

she squealed as she drove off, the tires screeching. Maybe giving her license back was a bad idea. One thing's for sure:

If she wants to drive like Toonces the Cat, (or a crash test dummy) I will _never_ be riding with her!

Once I got to the reservation, Carlisle had been there. He was supplying the equipment needed for Jacob to keep up his facade around Charlie.

Apart from the obvious heartbreak he was suffering, he looked better. "Bella?" he asked when I entered his room, I smiled sadly. "No," I corrected, "It's Nicki"

"Nicki?" he sighed, disappointed. "You look so much like Bella," "Yeah, I get that a lot. _Family_ resemblance."

The word "Family" gave a bad aftertaste on my tongue. He caught it, despite the pain from his nearly healed bones. "What?" "Jake…" I sat beside him.

"You may not believe me, but you and I are a lot alike. We both have had our hearts broken by someone we trusted and loved."

Jacob's eyes widened with shock and outrage. "Seth! Did he?!" "No," I said, calming him down. "It was someone else, a different kind of love and relationship.

But it still _hurts_ all the same, _even_ to this day. It has definitely played a role in making me who I am. I just hope and pray you'll have the strength you need."

I patted his hot uninjured arm in comfort. "Why did you come here?" he asked, "You're my _brother_ …my pack brother and I care for you deeply.

Like the rest of you goofballs, you took me in and _let_ me _be_ a part of your family. Something I haven't _had_ and _needed_ for a long time.

Whether _she_ marries _him_ or not, _we're_ still _family._ That doesn't change, and you _ain't_ getting rid of _me_!" I joked seriously, leaving him to rest before his next patrol.

"Billy," I said acknowledging him just before heading out the front door. "Nicki, wait!" "Yes," I answered turning around to face him.

"Come, take a walk with me" I nodded, stepping back as he went ahead wheeling himself out the door. I bet we made quite a scene:

Me with my metal "legs" hobbling alongside his chair. Finally he stopped a good distance from the house he stopped and beckoned me closer to sit on a fallen log.

It was overcast but not raining, it hadn't for days, my butt wouldn't get wet. So I complied, waiting.

"Nicki…" he began, "How much do you know of your personal history? The _real_ history?" "Everything," I sighed ruefully.

"So you know what we did for Charlie and Renee?" "Yep," I said, trying to suppress a groan at the woman's name.

"Please understand Nicki, that Charlie had no control over the situation. He spent years looking for you and was beyond relieved when you contacted him.

It was a miracle! So please don't continue to be too harsh with him." "Billy…" I tried to find the words.

"While it's true that still I am hurt and do have a tiny bit of resentment that he didn't find me in all those years, you say he looked. I am trying to forgive him.

But he's not the problem: My entire life has been a lie and a secret. I'm sick of being the skeleton shoved and re shoved into the closet.

The only way _she_ actually _let_ Charlie take me was that Bella never be told the truth."

My life was messed up, and it started with someone's choice. Now that Bella's made hers, time will tell what lies ahead for Jacob.

When I got home, Charlie was no doubt still in shock from the big news this morning. He was sitting down in his chair, facing the TV.

His expression was the one he had on whenever his team lost the game.

I went to the fridge to get a glass of juice just as Bella came into the kitchen to fix dinner, having just got off the phone with _her_ mom.

"How did it go?" I asked, "Surprisingly better than expected. Charlie's big threat was that _I_ had to tell Renee"

Oh Great! "And how did she take it?" I asked, trying to sound interested. Truth is… I didn't care what that woman had to say.

"She was happy for me, saying that I've found another old soul and I shouldn't judge myself by her standards."

I started chocking on those words, excusing my coughing fit for juice going down the wrong tube. Phew! That was a close one. "Where were you?"

"I was at the reservation, checking on Jacob. He's doing better," not sure if I should tell her that. "Good, but why were you over there in the first place?"

That was stupid! "I don't know Bella, Why do you visit the Cullens?" She gaped at me, "That's crazy! They are my family!"

I smiled, "Well there you go, just because you burned your bridges with them. Doesn't mean I have to" "You claim to be imprinted to Seth but are you really?

I only see you two as friends, best friends. Nothing romantic about it."

"Because that's what I _need_ him to _be!_ The whole point of being an imprint! I can't handle anything other than friendship!

And _who are you_ to lecture me about relationships! Seeing as you _played_ with _both_ of those boys' hearts before finally making a decision!"

That shut her up, gasping before stomping up to her room and we didn't talk for the rest of the week.

Friday morning was filled with commotion both on and off the reservation. Edward had sent Jacob an invitation to the Wedding. His response:

strip/turn into a wolf and run away to Canada. Though no one else outside La Push pack and its council knew his true location.

Charlie was quick to act, keeping busy by making and distributing missing flyers with Jacob's name, picture and information. Billy, loyal to his son's wishes.

Chose not to put up any around the Res. much to Charlie's dismay, Stating "Jacob's grown, he'll come home when he's ready."

Bella and I still weren't speaking so I hadn't told her that I knew where he was.

The pack didn't want me to anyway, saying that she betrayed them and had hurt Jacob badly enough already. I could see their point and I agreed with them.

But Bella, she wasn't taking "no" for an answer though. Tomorrow she was planning on going after him.

"Things just keep getting worse and worse!" I told Seth as we took a walk down first beach, my arm intertwined with his to keep my balance.

"But what can you do Nicki?" "I am honestly at a loss… and weighed down with all the secrets that are building up. Secrets… that's it!"

"What's it?" he asked, not following. _The truth will set you free..._ "I know what I have to do," To hell with Renee!

Once I got home, I was given a not too subtle reminder from Alice about the sleepover tonight on my cell phone. Oh I was going alright!

But I needed to be prepared. Taking out medium sized white cardboard box with a lid on it, from under my bed. Its contents were what was left of my childhood.

I made my way to Charlie's desk drawer where he kept the files, searching. Having found the right ones, I tucked them in with the rest of my stuff.

Charlie said he'd let me go _if_ I made amends with Bella. I knocked on the door to her room "Come in," she answered from the other side.

Surprised to see me upon turning around she asked, "What do you want?" I sighed, "I won't apologize for what I said days ago, I still stand by it.

But I _am_ sorry about Jacob," she scoffed in disbelief.

"For the sake of Charlie and living under the _same_ roof until the "I do's" Can we call a truce?"

The ride to the Cullens was a rocky one once we turned on the gravel road.

Bella's old beast of a truck made you feel every little bump as I bounced up and down on my seat in the cab.

Soon enough we were there, the welcoming committee swarmed and brought us into the house.

" _Edward?_ " I asked mentally, he popped his head up from his seat on the couch, nuzzling Bella in his arms. _"_ _Please pass this on to the others_ :

 _I have something important to tell Bella at nine o' clock. You all can listen to what I have to say. My only request is that it goes no further than this house?"_

He nodded giving me a suspicious look. " _Don't gimme that look Hair G-! Err! I mean…_ _Please_ … _Edward,_ _do not_ look _at me that way_?

 _This is going to be_ _hard enough_ _as it is._ _I am going to let my guard down._ _Something, I never_ _EVER_ _do"_ trying to stress my point.

His jaw dropped as the realization of what I was about say set in. This time, he nodded eagerly.

"What are you two going on about?" asked Bella, she hated being out of the loop.

Unfortunately Alice picked just that precise moment to interrupt, stealing me away to her bedroom. There, she took my measurements.

Then called Bella in for our traditional dress up/makeover. Alice, praise the lord. Knowing my limits, took it easy on me.

I must say she's gotten good as styling my wig from its perch on the manikin. Thus I was free when she did Bella's make up and hair.

I glanced at the clock, 8:15. Might as well have a little fun before the heavy. Gathering up the boys I knew just what to do…

Going through Emmett's closet I found leather motorcycle jackets, baseball caps and a bandana for me.

Dressed in our gear, we crept along (with Emmett's help in carrying me) into the back of the vanity where Alice and Bella were.

Jasper then hit the button on his mp3 player. George Thorogood and the Destroyers' "Bad to the Bone" started blasting.

Then Emmett, Jasper, and Edward started hip hop/break dancing.

As I bounced and swayed to the music on Emmett's shoulders in the background of the vanity mirror causing the girls to crack up.

Alice wasn't even mad at the mascara running down Bella's face from laughing so hard.

The parents and Rosalie joined in the fun too, once they came to investigate the hula- baloo. Time sure flies when you're having fun, in this case it passed too quickly.

For suddenly Alice screeched as her visions of the future went dark and a wolf howled!

Show Time!

"Alice calm down, it's just Seth" Edward assured his sister. "Maybe he has news on Jacob?" Bella put in, curious as to what the young wolf was doing here.

"It's okay Bella… Alice" I began, "I asked him to be here tonight. No, he's not coming into the house, Rose" I stated knowing her mind on my furry friend.

"He'll be circling the perimeter" "This is crazy Nicki!" my cousin shouted, "I can't believe that after all this time…. You still don't trust them!"

"Bella…"

"No Nicki! Not this time! WHAT ARE YOU SO AFRAID OF?!" I turned from her to the Cullens. "Would you guys mind excusing us for a few minutes?"

"Or an hour?" I added under my breath, knowing they could hear me. They all nodded slowly realizing what was coming.

"Of course" answered Carlisle, "We'll be down in the living room if you need us" as he ushered everyone out, closing the door behind him.

I faced my pissed off cousin and prayed for the strength to do this calmly and that she'd listen.

"Seth is here Bella, to give me moral support for something I'm about to do. It _nothing_ to do with the Cullens." "What is it?" she asked, still put out.

"I'm going to tell you a story-" "So what else is new? You tell stories all the time… Which story?" "Ahhh! Mine" "WHAT?"

Grabbing the white box I brought. I sat down on the bed…

"Life is a precious thing" I stated looking out the window into the sunset. "Just think… it all happen cause two cells found each other, bonded and multiplied…

ultimately resulting in a tiny human being known as a "baby". Some are considered happy little accidents. Some are wanted and planned.

Then there are others born out of necessity with a job to do…Guess which one I was?" Looking over at my stunned cousin, this was not what she was expecting.

"To truly understand my story, we have to go back in time to Nov.4th 1988" I opened the lid taking out one of Charlie's folders and flipping it open.

"It says here on that date in Riverside, California at Regional Medical Center.

A little toddler by the name of Bella Marie Swan was admitted at 7: 20 am by her mother Renee Swan. Experiencing a high fever and shakes.

She was later tested positive for Stage 2 Brain Cancer" Handing over the paper to her, which she read vigorously. Glancing up shocked!

"You've never seen this before have you?" I asked, yet knowing the answer. "Your clumsiness isn't all that natural.

You had a tumor in there, when removed it affected your balance." Bella's eyes widen with understanding but narrowed in confusion.

"Where do _you_ come in?"

"Months later the treatments they put you through was not working on account of some of your… _parts_ were getting worn out and shutting down.

Both Charlie and Renee test for donation but were unsuccessful in finding a match.

They reached out to everyone and as a last resort put out requests on the National Donor Line. It was pretty bleak there for a while.

Didn't know if you were coming or going. Finally, one day things changed when a new doctor came to the clinic and took over your case.

He suggested to Renee and Charlie an idea. One that was still considered experimental but worth a shot: A Donor Child.

Someone created in a Petri dish to have your exact genetic DNA. The Problem was Renee… could conceive but no longer carry to term.

So that idea was put back on the shelf until May 17th 1989 when Sarah and Billy Black agreed to carry the child for them."

Bella gasped, "Yes, I was born on January 14th 1990 with Jacob. I guess his parents did _it_ not long after the insemination. He came out first."

I then showed her the copy of the paperwork for the surrogate parent and my _real_ birth certificate. If I had a nickel for every time her jaw dropped.

"Since Charlie and Renee were divorced, Renee got full custody of _both_ kids. So that how it was…

I spent almost my first five years living in and out of hospitals with you. As the doctors took what they needed out of me so that you could survive.

But you know? I don't regret one minute of it" I said, reaching back in the box and taking out a photo from an old snap shot camera.

Written on the white label underneath in red ink was _Bella's Birthday Sept. 13_ _th_ _1994_.

In the picture was two little girls with fluffy white turbans on their heads snuggling with each other in the same hospital bed.

Hogging the blanket with small bits of chocolate frosting smeared on their faces, happy as can be. "That was our last birthday we ever spent together"

Bella blinked repeatedly as she stared at the photo. "I _remember_ "she whispered, looking straight at me in a new light. "Nicki?" I nodded, "It's really _you_ isn't it?"

"The one and only" I felt myself pulled into a tight hug. "Nicki…I'm so sorry" she rocked me back and forth, not letting go. "Why didn't you tell me earlier? Or Charlie?"

"One step at a time Bella," I broke away. "I will tell you everything. But let it be in the right order."

"What happened to you? I went to sleep that Christmas and in the morning you were gone.

When I asked Renee, she said "It was for the best and it was just going to be her and me from now on. And I should be happy I wasn't sick anymore."

I gritted my teeth, "Yeah she would say that." Bella raised an eyebrow, "I don't like Renee. Hopefully as I continue my story, you'll understand why."

If I didn't have Bella's attention before, I sure had it now. "Remember when I told you at the treaty line month ago that "

At seven you defied the odds and came out on top?" She blinked, "Yeah I remember" "Well that was it for me, as far as Renee was concerned.

You had beaten the Cancer. There was no longer a need for me to be around.

She couldn't continue to support _two_ kids on her own with a Kindergarten Teacher's salary when there was no need for it.

So she let me go…into the foster system. Bella's eyes bulged! "WHAT?!" "Yes, she did" I sighed, "I remember it well.

This kind of trauma, you don't tend to forget easily: It was just after midnight, Christmas had ended.

Little did I know that this part of my life was about to end as well.

I was fast asleep across from you and I awoke when I felt a pair of strange hands pick me up and start to carry me away.

Opening my eyes to find I was in the arms of a man I'd never seen before. "Is this the child ma'am?"

I heard Renee's voice then, "Yes, I just can't take care of her anymore" "Mommy? What's going on? Who is he?" I asked scared.

Renee, she… she wouldn't even _look_ at me. "I'm sorry Baby… so sorry" "You're doing the right thing Ma'am?" he asked, "Yes… take her"

"Mommy? Mommy? Where's he taking me?! Let me go! MOMMY?!"

I shrieked as he rounded the corner of the hospital wing taking me away from the only family I ever knew…." I heard growling and whimpering downstairs.

So they _were_ listening? Which was just fine since I gave them permission. I took a minute to gather myself for the next part.

"My first few days in the foster home were hard.

When I asked for my mother, no one would give me a straight answered except the other kids in the house which was always something snotty.

Like "Face it! Your momma didn't want you. So quit your crying and suck it up!"

Night time was the worst, I would start crying and be hit in the head with a book in a pillow case. Followed by a "Shut up!"

After a week or so I learned to suffer in silence then nobody would notice or hurt me. Then two months later to my surprise, I had a visitor…it was Renee!

I begged her to take me home. She said "No, not right now Pumpkin" That was her answer _every_ time she came to see me.

One thing you have to realize about the foster care, a child's never in the same home for very long.

I was moved all over the country from place to place every six months. But the only thing constant in my life was… Renee.

When she couldn't drive to my new location, she called or wrote letters. Filling me with false hope that someday she'd come back for me.

Then we could finally be a family again. That belief was furthered when couples who wanted to adopt me couldn't.

I later learned she never fully gave up rights to me. So that's how it continued, back and forth over the years.

My situation in the foster homes didn't get much better either, it was almost always overcrowded and full of troubled youths.

The caretakers were clearly just in it for the money…. And speaking of money, it ran out _fast_ along with everything else like… _food_ and _clothes._

I found myself stealing extra portions at School lunch, just so I could have a full belly once a day.

The summer before first grade I figured out money and how to get some: Get a job!

So I spent two and a half months working the neighborhoods, doing whatever I could to save. I hid my stash in a secret compartment underneath a small music box.

Every penny counted, I made sure to spend wisely. Anywhere I wanted to go, I rode the bus. The "responsible" adults were hardly home, except for late evening.

The kids had free rein and I was more _alone_ than ever before."

"That soon changed _too,_ to my surprise. This time…for the better!" I smiled, lost in the memory. "It was Christmas Eve 1999.

Nearly five years after I was taken into the foster care when it happened. On that holiday season I was in Chicago, staying in my newest home. "The "Johnsons".

It wasn't too crowded, I was one of six other kids. My normal crowd was ten.

The couple in charge weren't home, they'd taken three of the children on vacation with their bonus.

Leaving the eldest to look after the others, which wasn't much seeing as he was girl crazy. But what else would you expect a teenage boy to do?

Anyway even though it was a holiday. I still had a job to do and I was determined to get it done.

Within weeks after moving there, I had gotten employed as I paperboy, delivering The Chicago Sun Times to the neighborhoods in the area.

Never mind that I had a cold and it was stormy out. If I didn't work then I didn't eat or have new clothes for the New Year, Particularly a good winter coat.

So I started my route and by the end of it I was coughing and sneezing as I shivered through my thin wet coat.

After a trip to the store, back into the bucketing down freezing rain and needing to get "home" right away, I decided to take a short cut.

As I ran through a dark alley between two sets of houses. I heard something bash into the tin garbage cans. Taking a closer look I discovered the body of a rat!

Before another was flung in the same direction and I ducked. Suddenly a cold gust of wind came up blowing right through me, causing me to look away.

When I turned my head back, I was face to face with the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. As her hand reached out to touch/ grab my throat, I did a quick study.

She was medium size, maybe 5/5. Her snow white skin was just as cold as it was pale.

Her long silvery gray hair blowing in the breeze, casing her heart shape face and ruby red lips. But what got me was her eyes:

They were pitch-black with what I would later know as thirst. Just as her lips caressed my throat before she bit down.

 _My_ hand made contact with _hers_ and I felt this…this energy came out of me. Suddenly without warning she released me and with a _thud_ I collided with an Iron Gate.

I got up leaving my bags behind and ran the rest of the way. I even climbed a tree into the upstairs window and locked it upon entering.

I was so worn out and exhausted that I passed out on the bathroom floor, looking for a thermometer. Half delirious when I woke.

I found that I been stripped of my clothes and was currently wearing an oversized tee-shirt, tucked in the Johnsons' bed.

While a cool hand tipped my head up, pouring soup or hot tea down my achy sore throat.

I never heard the words or saw the face but it sure felt good to have someone take care of me for a change."

Bella sat up eagerly intrigued at this turn of events, wanting to know what happened next.

"It was officially two weeks before I was able to step outside the front door.

Once they heard me coughing and sneezing, the other occupants of the house wouldn't go inside the bedroom. Yet, I had a feeling I was being watched.

For every time I opened my eyes from sleeping, there was always something waiting for me on the nightstand. Be it: Soup, Tea, or Medicine.

I even found a change of clothes. The day I went back to work, I came in trying to think of how to excuse my absence, for I didn't call in or anything.

It turns out I didn't have to. Apparently, my "Mother" had called and explained. The day after I restarted my route, the Johnsons returned and School resumed.

So I was pretty busy and then sometime in mid-January. I was summoned to the foster agency. They'd found a new home for me.

As I waited for my new host, I couldn't shake the familiar feeling of being watched. Then my social worker came down the hall with a woman in toe.

When they got closer, I recognized her. It was the same woman that attacked me on Christmas!

The social worker introduced her as "Abigail Radcliffe" and I would be moving with her to Hawaii. She grabbed my hand as I trailed behind her out of the center.

It was all for show, I knew she could take me if I ran but that would blow her cover.

Nervous didn't even begin to describe how I felt when she ushered me into the backseat of her '97 Toyota Camry.

Putting the car in reverse as she backed out of the parking space. Abigail spoke to me "Don't be afraid Nicki, I'm not going to hurt you.

But you've seen too much and there are rules I must follow. You know what rules are, don't you Nicki?" "Yes," I squeaked, still unsure.

"What are you gonna do to me?" "I'm correcting my mistake," she said. "You are going to be staying with me from now on until you're old enough to be turned."

"Into what?" "A talk for another time, love. Just relax, we'll be at the airport soon."

In an effort to relax me, she turned on the radio and found a station playing soothing classical music. It worked, too well I might add. I fell asleep…

I was tired anyway, having gotten up early. The next thing I knew.

I was laying in her lap, wrapped in a pink fleece blanket with Minnie Mouse printed all over the outside.

The smells and the sounds of the people made me realize we were in the airport, waiting. I scooted off her lap and into the next chair over.

I wasn't ready to be _that_ close, I hardly knew her. Then I heard, "Ladies and Gentlemen, Flight 467. Chicago to Honolulu is now boarding."

The entire 8 ½ hours were spent playing the "Getting to know you" game. We landed at 7:15 pm our time in Honolulu International airport.

After gathering our bags, we wound up spending the night in a cheap motel.

Then in the morning took a boat to our final destination and ended up settling just outside of a small town named "Hanalei" on the island of Kauai.

In the end it wasn't so bad. Though it took almost a month for Abigail to gain my trust. She wasn't like any foster "parent" I'd had before.

She was _responsible_ and actually took _care_ of me. Made sure she _knew_ where I was. The whole thing was _strange_ at first, having grown up the way I did.

It took me awhile to realize that's what a _parent_ is supposed to _do_. I got to chill out and _be_ a regular kid.

Whose only real problem was making sure I did my homework and turned it in on time?

Back when I had other responsibilities, I just barely made it through class with passing C's. Now I was up to A's and B's, depending on the subject.

Whenever I struggled, Abigail was there. Helping me anyway she could. As time passed, I slowly started to see her more as my _Mom_ then Renee.

Speaking of which, she _still_ was sending letters or calling me every other month. Each time she contacted me, it only seemed to make it worse.

I'd either hang up or finish reading before I'd burst into tears, curling up on the floor of my room where Abigail would find me.

She then would pick up and cradle me in her cold arms.

Stroking my hair, shushing as I calmed down before taking me to the living room and putting on a Disney Movie.

More than once, she took over the phone when my "mom" called. Trying to protect me from further heartache.

Abigail expressed her interest repeatedly in wanting to adopt but Renee said "No" each time it was brought up. Thus the cycle continued!"

Bella blinked, "I can't believe she would do that. Then again, she always had a hard time letting things go.

The day I left for Forks, she kept asking me even on the way to the airport "Are you sure?"

Out of respect for my newfound sister, I wasn't going to say nothing.

Before you knew it, I'd spent three _wonderful_ years with Abigail. She taught me a lot of things. One of which was Music.

 _She_ was the one who taught me how to play the piano. I can still picture and hear the sound of our laughter.

Singing along to the radio whenever we drove the Jeep to and from town. Abigail supported me in whatever I wanted to learn, from Hula Lessons to Surfing.

Then one day I was cleaning out the attic where I found a guitar that must have belonged to the previous owners.

Abigail let me keep it and I learned to play the heck out of that thing! Once I turned twelve, she sat me down.

Explained about the Supernatural World, _what_ she was and what _I_ would _become_ according to the law.

There was still time yet for she planned to change me at eighteen. Plus she also wanted to see how my gift would develop once I hit puberty.

That's what she claimed I _had_. Judging by what happened when we first met. If I had a "gift" at all, it was a subtle one.

Abigail said I had a talent for taming the "beast" in her. Especially when she didn't hunt like she was supposed to. Abigail was an animal drinker, like the Cullens.

What I know of her backstory is this:

She was a twenty-seven year old British immigrant during the Revolutionary War. That was turned into a vampire for siding with the Americans.

"Where is Abigail now? And _why_ aren't you with her?" asked Bella, curiously. I looked down trying to blink away the tears.

"She…She died" I choked out, the hurt still evident after all these years. I grabbed a tissue and blew my nose. "Oh," she gave me a sympathy look.

"What happened?" "It was similar to what happened with you, the Cullens, and James. I just turned thirteen according to my _real_ birthday.

Bella gave me a look, "I wasn't allowed to keep my actual birth date going into the system. It was changed to June 22nd.

Renee withheld that information among other stuff. I know I keep ragging on Renee. I'm _not_ saying she's a bad person. I'm saying:

She was young and _incredibly_ immature in how she handled things." My sis just nodded, I continued:

"We'd just moved back to the States, settling in Montana when it happened: A single nomadic vampire had caught my scent and attacked us.

Abigail fought to protect me. Being the oldest and more experienced of the two, she won the fight. But at a price: _Her Life_."

I took a deep shuddering breath. Waiting a few minutes to collect myself… I reached into the box again, pulling out a picture. Handing it to Bella.

"This was her and me at a local Luau… Careful, this is all I have left." My sister just stared at the picture in awe, "She was beautiful Nicki."

"Inside and Out…" (Sniffling) "The months that followed were unbearable. It was as if a hole had been punched through my heart. I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep.

I was reissued back into the human foster care. I never spoke a word regarding my knowledge of the Supernatural.

The best way to honor her, I thought was to keep the secret. My life resumed the way it had been before Abigail. But it was _never_ the same.

My time with her had changed me. I now knew, I deserved better. I ran away multiple times from the home, trying to find what I had lost.

The cops brought me back each and every time. The only upside was that Renee had _finally_ stopped calling and writing to me.

 _Then_ …" I took a breath, steeling myself for the next part. " _On June 22_ _nd_ , _my supposed_ _birthday…_ " I forced myself to go on.

"I received _this_ letter…" reaching into the box and pulling out an envelope. Handing it to Bella, I said "Here, I _can't_ read this… but you can… Read it out loud.

There are others who would like hear to what it says,"

Bella took a deep breath and began to read:

 _"Nicole,_

 _Please understand, I have made a terrible mistake where you are concerned. Instead of being up front and honest with you._

 _I've repeatedly dragged you along, giving you the wrong impression and I apologize for that._

 _Last month, Bella accidently found one of the letters you sent me years ago and questioned me about it._

 _It made me realize what I'd been doing and how wrong it was. So here's the truth: I like you Nicki, and I'm quite fond of you._

 _And I'm so thankful for all your help as far as Bella is concerned. But I… don't love you. I've_

 _never loved you._

 _I'm not coming back for you and I'm sorry I made you think otherwise. I just…_

 _couldn't let go of you… In the beginning there was a need, a purpose for you to be here._

 _And that was for Bella to get better. When she finally beat the cancer, you kind of…outlived your usefulness. I'm sorry but it's true._

 _At the time, all I thought was getting you out of here. I ended up feeling guilty for the next two months until finally I couldn't take it anymore._

 _That's when I visited. Thinking if I could just see that you were alright, I could leave. But once I saw you, old feeling resurfaced and I_

 _couldn't let go._

 _Now I realized that I've probably done more damage than good. So here's the deal: You promise to_

 _never contact me, Bella, or Charlie._

 _(I don't know if you remember him.) And I'll give up_

 _all rights to you, so you can be adopted by "Susie?" "Abby?" or whatever her name is._

 _Have a good life,_

 _\- Renee"_

Bella's eyes were as big as quarters when she looked up from that piece of paper. "She didn't want me to know I had a sister?"

I grimaced, "My guess is that she was ashamed about what happened.

And it didn't help matters that _apparently_ Charlie thought I'd been abducted from the hospital and was still searching for me." "WHAT?!"

"Yeah, she'd made the decision to give me up on her own. Then lied to him to cover it up. That's the problem with secret and lies.

They just grow bigger and heavier with age until it's all you care about…" I had to stop, my body had begun to tremble uncontrollably. It knew what was coming.

"Then… if that heart crushing letter wasn't enough on top of everything else I was feeling?

My life went from bad to worse to hell in a very short span of time...

I cried myself to sleep that night, knowing the last piece of hope I'd held on to was gone. They were having a party downstairs.

School had just gotten out and the adults weren't home. The place was crowded with teenagers, Partyin' and drinking booze.

My bedroom door was shut but not locked…" I shuddered in memory. "Suddenly the door busted open and this group of maybe five… to six _boys…_ stormed in!

They gr-grabbed m-me a-and h-hauled me from my b-bed. They t-took off m-my c-clothes! They! - They e-each took t-turns with me o-out on the l-lawn-!"

Enraged roaring erupted from downstairs and the next thing I knew was encased in the chilling, slender arms of Rosalie!

The word "Chilling" could also be used to describe the look on her face. Her eyes were _black_ , growling with anger and protectiveness.

" _Then what happened?!_ She asked in a deadly snarl. "I survived but the next morning I hurt all over.

It was made worse when I'd found that pictures of my naked body had been taken and sent all over my school (that was still in session.)

I had no sanctuary, People called me "Whore" and "Slut" everywhere I went. Finally, couldn't take it anymore.

So I took something to escape the pain and I got hooked. Later going for the hard stuff.

I always made s _ure_ to lock the door when I got high, especially during further parties that were held. Never mind that I had a pregnant belly-"

"WHAT?!" Bella and Rosalie said at the same time.

"Yeah I didn't walk away from that incident Scott free. There was a souvenir… Things stayed pretty much the same and I got more and more desperate for drugs.

Selling my possessions including my hair. I was arrested in November after robbing a convenient store. That's when I got the help I needed.

Going through detox and whatever treatments required for my baby to have his best chance." Both girls gasped then Rosalie asked "It was a boy then?"

"I had my son, Noah in February of the next year.

The first time I held him in my arms, it all became clear of just _how_ badly I screwed up and I made a promise to him: To be _better_ from here on out.

I got to spend six weeks with my boy before he closed his eyes… and never woke up.

The doctors said they did everything they could but he was too far gone from the prenatal drugs I took." Showing them the one photo I had of us:

Me, baldheaded in my hospital gown, holding a tiny blue bundle. His small red face visible between the top folds of the blanket and the little stocking cap on his head.

Bella was in shock while Rosalie looked at me sadly. I ignored both of them, needing to finish. "That was rock bottom for me.

I fell once more into depression, no drugs this time but I was almost comatose. That changed though when a Christian ministry came to the juvenile jail…

I'd heard of religion before but I'd always been too busy with what was going on around me to take much notice or think on it.

Now that I was practically in a cage 2.4, I had nothing _but_ time. So when the opportunity to get out for a couple hours came along, I leapt at it.

We (the group that volunteered) boarded a retired school bus which took us to the church. It was so nice and warm in there, I nearly fell asleep in the pew.

Then it started…the musicians stepped on stage, picked up the instruments and started playing.

The song they chose "Thy Word" was written by some chick named "Amy Grant". It was quite beautiful actually.

After three or four more songs, they went to their seats and the preacher took their place on stage. His name was "Pastor Ike".

He was a short, stout man in his 50's. Bald on the top of his head with a fringe of white hair on the bottom to match his mustache.

(Just picture Maurice from Disney's Beauty and the Beast and you got him!)

At first his message didn't make sense to me, if God was so mighty and powerful enough to create Heaven and the Earth in a week?

And bring justice down on Adam and Eve. Then, _why_ did he even _bother_ with us humans after that?

They said the answer was that he _loved us_ but I didn't see _how_ he could, given all the damage we'd done.

Yet something inside told me to keep listening and I obeyed. The real eye opener for me was when we learned of Jesus Christ and what he did for us.

Taking _my_ penalty and _others_ upon himself. So that _I_ could be _free_ of my sin and chose to follow him and his examples into eternal life.

My body may die but my _spirit_ will live on forever. In paradise or torment, depending on my choice in life.

Something tugged at my heartstrings and I was overwhelmed with emotion.

So I kept going, at the end of each service Ike would invite the people to come up to the steps of the altar, pray and give their life over to God.

I'd developed sort of a hard shell by then in order to protect myself and I did _not_ feel comfortable in large crowds so I didn't go.

But apparently the Great Almighty had other plans… One day after the congregation dispersed into the mess hall for refreshments.

I stayed behind in my pew then slowly walked to the stage. Staring at the cross, I dropped to my knees and began sob praying:

" _ **God,**_

 _ **I don't know if you're up there or…**_

 _ **Listening**_

 _ **Like they say you are**_

 _ **But if there's even a small chance it's true**_

 _ **Please hear me,**_

 _ **You know who I am**_

 _ **And you know what I've done**_

 _ **I don't know or deserve**_

 _ **To ask forgiveness**_

 _ **For myself**_

 _ **But please show mercy on my son**_

 _ **Don't blame him for**_

 _ **My actions**_

 _ **He's innocent**_

 _ **Spare him and**_

 _ **I promise**_

 _ **I'll spend the rest of**_

 _ **My life doing whatever I can**_

 _ **To make you proud**_

 _ **Amen"**_

I was crying so hard by the end of it, I had runny nose. And I felt a hand rest lightly on my shoulder. Looking up it was Pastor Ike, he'd heard everything…

In the days that followed in Juvie I received a visitor, Ike had come to see me and said if I wanted to get something off my chest, he was there to listen.

It was called counseling. I told him my story, leaving out the supernatural elements of course and showed him Renee's letter, I'd kept in my back pocket.

We would talk about the bible and about God. He said I'd _always_ been somebody's child, God's Child and he would never leave me nor forsake me.

I was precious in his eyes, like my son was. It felt so _good_ to know that someone _loved me._ And _my job wasn't over yet! I still had a purpose!_

There was still work to be done. Just not the kind I was expecting or use to…

We continued on that way and time flew by. Soon I was released from the Juvenile Center in Napa, California, having served eighteen months.

I wasn't going back to the "home" I'd stayed before my arrest, Thank God! Rumor had it, I was gonna be staying with some new folks.

After my things were returned to me. (I didn't have much, just the clothes on my back and Abigail's guitar.) I walked out of the joint, finally _free_.

At least my body was… my soul had been liberated for months once I accepted Christ as my lord and savior. Pastor Ike was waiting for me to my surprise.

It furthered when I found that I'd been _placed_ with _him_! Ike informed me that we'd be moving to Portland, Oregon.

There was a small church in desperate need of a new Pastor.

So we loaded my things in the car (a 2004 Suzuki Grand Vitara) and headed off down the road towards a new life. Prior to taking me on, Ike lived by himself.

His wife, Paige had died six years ago due to lung cancer. And his twenty-three year old son, Jesse was serving over in Iran.

So I had a feeling this move would be good for both of us…

I was right for the first six months. Ike's presence had totally rejuvenated and brought life back to the little protestant church.

It was in that place that I was baptized and joined the choir but that didn't stop me from making music the other six days out of the week.

Sometimes I would just sit on the back porch, strumming my guitar like I didn't have a care in the world.

Then things got complicated again, when I got sick with my heart trauma and started chemo for something else.

Days would pass where I'd be so weak and in pain but I never lost my faith that God would get me through.

Finally, January 5th of this year Ike came to the hospital where I was at with wonderful news. He was practically bouncing on his heels with excitement.

Jesse was coming home! He would be there that night! Wanting to share in his joy, we persuaded the doc to let me out so I could go to the airport.

That was quite a reunion to behold! Guess Jesse got his height and features from his mom.

He was a tall, strong glass of water and to see him scoop his dad up and twirl him around. Made an all the more humorous and enjoyable sight…

We'd just turned off the bridge, entering the highway when it happened… Jesse was behind the wheel and his phone went off, altering him that he had a text.

Grabbing his cell, he looked down for a minute. One Minute! Taking his eyes off the road. He swerved into the wrong lane and our vehicle was hit head on!

By a large semi-truck! I woke up back in the hospital, feeling strange despite the pain killers. I tried to move my legs and flex my toes but nothing happened.

I quickly through back the blankets and screamed! My legs were gone from the knee down! All I had was these Stubbs."

I patted my knee affectionately. Both girls' eyes were wide and jaws dropped… _Hmm I'm looking at fifty cents right here!_

"The doctor came in with news besides the obvious. I was the only survivor, both Ike and Jesse had gone to meet our maker.

I'd also lost some additional parts in the wreck…female stuff. I grieved for their loss, I'd miss them. Heck! I'm still missing 'em.

But I focused on what they left behind. Believing in heaven, made it easier to let them go. So I would continue to live the best I could.

After two going on three months of therapy and getting use to the prosthetics. I was able to leave the hospital.

The foster system had gotten so overcrowded, there wasn't enough people to manage everyone's records. So I was deemed an adult and free to go.

As I sat on a park bench enjoying my newfound freedom. I wondered what to do or go next, I felt that familiar feeling inside telling me to _go north._

I then walked into a pawn shop and sold my beloved guitar. For money to buy bus fare and journeyed out here.

Stopping in Port Angeles where I found Charlie's name and information in a phone book. _To hell with Renee, she doesn't control me._

I told myself as picked up a pay phone and started dialing… You can just imagine the rest:

Charlie was ecstatic, overwhelmed and _furious_ with my so- called "Mother" after I explained everything. He called her out on it too!

Saying if he'd known _that's_ what she was gonna do, he'd have taken me in a heartbeat! Immediately he drove out there and picked me up brought me to Forks.

I stayed with Deputy Mark and his family while Charlie set out to settle Renee's hash via phone call. Having played "Good cop, Bad cop" on her.

She eventually gave in and confessed the whole thing. Agreed to let him take me as long as you didn't know who I really was, Bella… The skeleton in the closet.

So that's my story…"

I blinked before looking at Rosalie. "Rosie?" I addressed her kindly, "I need to speak with Bella alone for this next part… So would you mind?"

"Oh!" she jumped up. "Yes of course! I'll be right out if you need me?" closing the door. Bella looked at me with such awe and curiosity. "What now?"

"You're a smart girl, Sis. Can you not think of the reason _why_ I told you this?" Realization dawned in her eyes, "It has to do with Jacob isn't?"

I nodded, "I see you going down the same path and making the mistakes our "Mother" did, with Jacob and Edward." "What? That's ridiculous!"

"No it's not, Edward's the chosen one. Like you were to Renee, and Jake is… me. The one you give up. The question is… Are you going to stick to your decision?"

Cause if you go after Jacob tomorrow like you plan, you will be giving him false hope. Something not real, that he may grow to resent you for.

Like me and Renee… I can't _stand_ that dame! …. Well her actions anyway.

I don't want to be around her and I don't let her control me in what I do or say, which is another reason why I told you this. You're a grown woman.

You know the truth now. You've read the letter. You can make up your own mind… I will asked that you think on this while you're deciding:

 _Jake doesn't deserve_ to be dragged along for your enjoyment of having him sometimes and it's _not fair to Edward_ either.

You're about to be married Bella, _Married!_ And what little I know about that is there's a clause in there called "Fidelity".

It means you _remain loyal_ to your spouse and _don't_ seeking pleasures elsewhere." I sighed, getting up off the bed, walking toward the door.

Grabbing the doorknob, I looked back at her. "You know in your heart what the right choice is to make Bella,"

End of Part Two


	3. Chapter 3

_**A Big Thank You to all who've Followed, Favorited and Reviewed!**_

 _ **To Guest 1:**_

 **In response to your question about the "other" characters. Please remember that Nicki for the most part has been isolating herself from people prior to coming to Forks. The only people she's close to are in her immediate circle and everyone else is just another face in the crowd.  
 _To Guest 2:  
_ Please just hang in there and be patient with me. One of my Reviewers kindly pointed out. That they had a hard time following the story due to poor editing. So they've been taken down to be fixed. But be reassured eventually everything will be posted and the tale complete.  
**

 **FINDING HOME:**

 **(Part 3)**

A Twilight's Eclipse – Breaking Dawn AU Fanfiction

By Fantasy Writer

Nicole "Nicki" Swan's POV:

Walking out of that bedroom was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life.

But I'd done it, I finished what I set out to do.

Now all that was left to do was wait and see if Bella got the message. I prayed that she did, it would make things so much easier in the long run. For Her _and_ Jake!

I began the slow trudge down the staircase. When I reached the bottom I was met with a roaring, standing applause and a salute from Jasper. "Private Swan reporting, to Captain Cullen and Major Whitlock, Crisis is hopefully averted Sirs. Time will only tell what Sergeant Swan will do"

They chuckled at my humorous attempt to lighten the mood. Alice then pulled me aside into a firm hug that wasn't bone crushing. "Thank you Nicki, I was so worried when I saw Bella's future disappear."

"I didn't stop her Alice"

"But you-"

"Gave her the facts. So she could make an _informed_ decision, like when you guys were explaining the Pros and Cons of being a Vampire. Tell me Alice, What _kind_ of life do you want her to live? _Hers_? Or the life you _planned_ for her?"

She took a step back, "You're right, I just get so worried when her future is blacked out. She's my best friend and sister. I just… _don't_ want anything to happen to her."

"That's understandable, but when you truly love some _one_ or something. You set it free." I said, starting to sound a bit like a wise old owl. _And I wasn't even sixteen yet, according to the papers._

"I think I need some air," I said, walking out onto the balcony. I looked up at the sky, it was overcast but the rains hadn't come yet. Then I heard an animalistic whiny yelp from below, it was Seth. "I'm alright," I told him, "That was just a lot at one time. Sorry if I horrified you?"

He gave a low growl, roughly translated: "Yeah, but I'm tough. I can handle it."

I smiled sadly, knowing it was all he could do to hold himself together. " _Try_ not to think about it, _live_ in the _now,_ " I advised.

He gave a guilty whine.

"It's okay that the others know, as long as it stays in the family." Seth huffed in relief as his four legs sagged to the ground. "Really, I'm fine. I do want to thank you Seth, for being in the area. It helped"

Immediately alert, he leapt to his paws. "Sam's calling?" I asked, he nodded his big furry head. "You can go, it's alright. I'll come by the Res. Tomorrow. We'll talk more then, Goodnight."

That seemed to raise his spirits, I did my signature howl to encourage him. Which he answered with his own before turning around and heading back down to La Push…

" _WHAT_ was that?" asked Emmett, once I re-entered the building.

"Just how Seth and I say "I love you and, I'm here for you."

"That's sweet," answered Esme.

"Did you just say "You loved him?" asked Edward, "But Bella said that-"

"Yes, I love him. There are _different kinds_ of love. And for your information…Seth and I are just _starting_ to take our relationship to the next level. We're going at our own pace, but that's enough about my personal life tonight… Okay?"

The rest of the night was much better.

Everyone just chilled out and watched a movie. With the exception of Bella and…later Edward, they had a lot to talk about upstairs.

The Cullens seemed to have developed a different attitude towards me. Not that they weren't polite and friendly before. It's just that the look they gave me now held admiration and respect.

It felt weird. I wasn't anything special, I hadn't done anything. I just survived.

Everyone took turns, wanting to sit by me for some odd known reason. They also actually _waited_ on me, hand and foot if I wanted something.

I went to bed at midnight, but I couldn't sleep. On this night it was always hard, _Happy Birthday._

After an hour, there was a soft knock on my door. "Nicki? It's Esme. Can I come in?"

"Sure," I got up and unlocked it.

The door gently swung open and the Mother Vampire stepped in. "Can't sleep?" she asked, handing me a steaming hot mug. "Its herbal tea, I thought you might like it."

"Thanks," I mumbled blowing and taking a sip.

She was quiet for a moment then said "That was a very brave thing you did tonight Nicki," "Brave? Or Foolish? I felt it needed to be said."

She nodded in agreement, "Still, I know it wasn't easy."

"No…it was not _, but_ if sharing my pain can save others? Then it's worth it…"

Esme smiled, "Jasper calls you "Little Soldier."

" _That_ is biggest compliment I've ever received since my days with Abigail. So tell him I said "Thank you,"

"You still miss her, don't you?" she asked me.

"Always, she was my mother. She may not have given birth or legally adopted, but _she was_ in every other aspect of the word…"

"Now you're with Seth?" she stated.

Taking a breath, needing to get this out in the open before I lost my nerve. "Esme?"

"Yes?"

"There is something you have to know about me…I don't see things the way a lot of people do, and by _people_ I mean different species. But that's just it! My point right there! It _doesn't matter_ to me, " _Who is what?"_ I look at _the person_ : their behavior and their judgement. The same can be said for human nationality, it doesn't matter if you're gay, straight or in between."

I calmly changed the subject as memories of my last visit to the Cullens played in my head. "Now…I know you wish that Edward and I got along better, true there have been some improvements. Who knows? Maybe someday in the future we'll be closer?"

"Really?" She asked, I knew this had been tough on her.

"For right now we still have a _long ways_ to go and…we'll _never_ be buddy-buddy. Our personalities are just _too_ different. _But_ I think if it comes down to a certain _someone_ that we _both_ care for, I can see us working together" giving her that smidgeon of hope.

"Thank you Nicki" Esme embraced me with a lukewarm hug, due to the heat from the tea I was drinking.

Taking advantage of the silence, Esme voiced a question "Nicki is something wrong? That is keeping you from sleeping? I know you don't sleep good but I don't recall you ever being this weary in the past?"

Finally, she was getting down to it, her reason for being here. Might as well fess up…

"Today's my birthday according to foster care, it's also the anniversary of when… I still have nightmares of _it_ happening"

"Oh Sweetie!" Gasped Esme,

"It times like these I miss having Abigail around. She use to hold me in her arms when I was having a bad night. Made me feel safe…" I trailed off looking away.

I then felt a cool hand on my shoulder, "Nicki…I'm not her, But _-_?" Esme held her arms out in welcome.

"Oh yes…!"

So it was for first time in many a moon I slept soundly safe in the cold embrace of a loving Vampire…

The next morning I was awoken by Alice pounding on my door. I guess Esme relocked it on her way out. From the way she was bouncing on her feet. I have no doubt if the lock hadn't been there, she'd be jumping on the bed.

"Happy Birthday Nicki! Esme's make a big breakfast for you and Bella!" Alice announced excitedly.

I groaned, still hugging the pillow. "No offence, but you _really need_ to switch to decaf."

She chuckled and waltzed down the hall. A few minutes later I met Jasper, "Howdy Little Soldier, how ya doin'?"

"Pretty good. Though for those who aren't morning people, you might want consider hiding the coffee from your wife."

Laughter erupted from the whole house, he smiled. "I know what you mean, fortunately we _don't_ drink that stuff…"

After breakfast, (which was a delicious omelet.) I stepped outside, leaning on the porch railing. I closed my eyes and slowly inhaled the rain's refreshing scent. It may not have rained last night but it was gonna and soon. My moment's peace was interrupted by a familiar voice from behind.

"Nicki?"

"Bella?" I turned my head slightly, acknowledging her. "Yes?"

I heard movement, next thing I knew she was right beside me. Looking into my identical brown eyes, the one feature we both inherited from Charlie. "I've been doing a lot thinking and… You're right,"

Now it was _my_ turn for the eyes to pop out of their sockets! "What?"

"You are right, I've been selfish. So I'm going to do the right thing and… _not_ go after Jacob. I do love him but, I want him to live his own life. And not _hate_ me. Which I am going to do now…with Edward."

I breathed a sigh of relief then Bella spoke again. "I also um… spoke with Charlie this morning."

"Oh," I blinked.

"We talked about what you said last night, your…history? And he confirmed it."

"Glad you needed a second opinion," I said, hurt and a little upset. I had to get away from there, I began trudging down the steps.

"Wait!" she got in front, blocking my path. "Nicki, I'm sorry I-!"

"Bella, not now" I got around her,

"Nicki?" she grabbed my arm.

"Do you…No! _Can_ you at least _attempt_ to understand? ... _I let my guard down!_ Something I never _ever_ did. I _won't_ be making t _hat_ mistake again. Tell Esme, "Thanks for the food."

I told her before I took off into the woods howling.

Seth of course heard me, having stayed nearby in his wolf form. He knelt down as I climbed onto his back and we took off towards our home, La Push.

Bella's POV:

I just stood there as I watched Nicki disappear, moving further out of sight.

I hadn't meant to make her mad.

She thought I didn't believe her by going to Charlie and even more so that I _betrayed_ her _trust_!

There was just no winning... No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to stop myself from stupid and taking it one step too far! I mean, I _saw_ her face, how relieved/happy she was (an emotion rarely seen on her except with Seth)… when I said I wasn't going after Jacob. Then with just _two_ sentences, from my big fat mouth! I ruin everything.

I felt Edward wrap his arm around my shoulders which I leaned into welcomingly.

"Don't worry love, she'll be back. She just needs some time."

I hope so Edward," "She will…" came Alice's voice from behind. I turned to find my entire family out on the porch.

"It's a bit blurry but I see Nicki returning about 5:30 tonight. She won't be as open though. Especially with you, Bella."

"I know," Given what she was like before and what I know now about her. It didn't surprise me.

"Bella?" asked Carlisle, "Could you come into my study for a minute?"

"Sure," following my father in law to be. Once inside, he closed the door. Ushering me to the seat across from his desk, where we both sat.

"Bella, please listen to me. Before she spoke to you last night, Nicki politely gave us permission to listen in. All she asked in return was that we keep what we heard to ourselves. She later gave that same permission to Seth and the pack. Judging by the way she reacted, I guess she hadn't told Charlie of her plan to break the truth to you."

I gasped, thinking back to our phone call. Come to think of it, Charlie did _seem_ quite surprised when I mentioned what I found out. It wasn't anything bad, in fact there was a tone of relief to his voice. Apparently he hated "The Secret" too…

Suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks!

God! I'd been so blind! Charlie is not the problem…Nicki's concerned word will get back to _Renee_!

After all s _he's_ the one who hid _the truth_ in the first place and she _still_ doesn't want it out. _Because she can't handle it._

"Bella?" Bella?"

"Carlisle, I think I understand now why she's so upset. It all goes back to Renee,"

He nodded.

"Yes, I think so too. But there's also something you need to be aware of concerning Nicki's predicament as far as her illness. They… the patients I've treated in the past with life threatening illnesses similar to what your sister is going through… may seem alright in the early stages as long as they're on medicine. But as the months go by, they lose more and more independence. Their life is no longer in their hands. So they'll cling to _whatever they can control_. Nicki know this, she's experiencing it…"

Wow, Nicki's never had much control over her life to begin with.

Now what little she has… she going to end up losing. It's not fair! I promise myself right now… _I will never take another choice away from her._

If I can get her to trust me?

Nicki's POV:

My day got better once I got away from the Cullen house and my sister.

Never thought I'd admit that, but it was true.

She just didn't get it, I've said it before.

 _Renee is not a bad person_. But she's so concerned with her image in Bella's eyes and what she'd think. Bella had already explained some of what growing up years were like after I'd left.

Like me, my sister matured fast and wound up _taking care_ _of_ "our" mother. Doing the finances and taking care of the house.

But I guess Bella _knowing_ that Renee gave up _her sister_ and _lied_ about it,is where she drew the line.

I could only hope Charlie wouldn't say anything. Last thing I needed was her calling up and chewing me out. Because I couldn't keep her shitty "little secret" which I never agreed to…

Once we crossed the border between Forks and La Push.

Seth, rather than getting down and letting me off as usual. Surprisingly kept going, taking the route to First beach. I should have known _then_ , something was up.

Finally, we got down there and the moment Seth's paws touched the sand. He howled, signaling the others. The next thing I saw and heard was, the entire pack running as a group down the beach to meet us.

Seth knelt to the ground. Giggling and laughing I was completely covered with canine saliva.  
Their behavior, similar to having a pack of overly excited young Labradors greet you when you first come home. Before running up the beach, taking cover behind the trees to transform.

Sam was the first to recover.

He strolled up, once again bare chested in his jean shorts. He smiled warmly before gently scooping me up, careful of my lower metal legs. Seth broke out from under and sprinted off into the trees to change.

"Happy Birthday Nicki!" Everyone echoed once they were back to human.

I blushed, "Thanks Guys,"

"We, with the help of Emily and Kim have prepared a special Birthday party for you." Sam told me,

"Really?" surprised and a little touched. "You guys, you didn't have to do that."

"Well we wanted to," added Quil.

"After all the crap you've been through, you deserve it kid," Paul put in. Okay…when the fiery asshole of the group is being " _nice_ "… Something is _definitely_ going on.

I know Seth squealed but that's okay. Though I have a feeling before the day is out, they're gonna give me _their_ input…

Sam ran up the beach with me in his arms, the others not far behind before coming to stop at a large campfire set up. Everyone involved with the pack was there:

Imprints and Elders.

I was surprised to see that Billy Black attended, ever since Jacob left and the dispute between him and Charlie over what to do occurred. He wasn't around much.

Sam placed me down the log nearest to him while Seth took his seat beside me. As I stared into flickering fire, and leaned against Seth's hot chest. I felt myself unwind, relaxing for the first time today.

Then Billy spoke up, capturing my small hand into his big rough coppered one. "Thank you Nicki, it took a lot of courage to do what you did and defend my son like that."

"You're welcome Billy," I answered. "Jacob's my brother, he deserves his chance."

"Yeah but at _your_ painful expense?!" exclaimed Jared.

I sighed, "Need I remind you that _Bella_ is _not_ a bad person. Slightly selfish and ignorant to what she was doing? Yes, but I think after hearing my tale, faced with the true reality of its consequences. It seems as though some of her blinders have been torn down… She's not going after Jacob, she's staying and marrying Edward."

Everyone had mix feelings about the news:

On one hand, nobody was happy that one of Charlie's daughters was gonna end up a "leech" but on the other hand, Jacob was now free to live his own life.

Thankfully the conversation took a different turn once the food arrived. We were actually having a birthday barbeque out on the beach. Complete with all the traditional food you'd usually find. From hamburgers, hot dogs and chips to watermelon, beans and potato salad. There was all kinds of pop and bottled water to drink too. I was so full by the time I finished.

Luckily being at the beach, there was a lot of activities you could do to burn up calories. Sun or no sun, living in western Washington. That's the way it is.

Embry pumped up his portable stereo and everyone in the pack started either grooving to 80's &90's music or played soccer. While I removed my lower "legs" sat and played in the sand with Seth, swaying in time. That afternoon was a blast and it came and went too fast!

At around 5 o'clock I knew I had to go back. Seth asked if I was sure, I nodded. He then resumed his wolf form and we took off towards the Cullens…

Even with Alice's gift, there was _no_ way I could have predicted what happened upon my return.

Seth trotted down the driveway to the Cullen's mansion, just stopping short of the steps before letting me off. After hauling myself up the stairs using the railing, I rang the doorbell. It was thankfully Emmett who answered,

"Nicki-roo! Where have you been? And what took you so long?!"

"Hey Emmett," I smiled. Grateful for the fact he didn't mention that I stunk like a dog.

Turns out it was just him at the house. Jasper and Alice had taken a quick shopping trip to Port Angeles. Esme, Carlisle and Rosalie were out hunting. And Bella and Hair Gel were spending some "quality" time up at their meadow. Everyone should be back by six no later than seven.

Not wanting to offend my hosts with my smell, I excused myself, gabbing the change of clothes I packed. Went in and took a shower in the guest bathroom.

When I finally exited, (having scrubbed every part of me I could find.) the people of the house plus my sister were home.

I noiselessly joined them in the living room. Alice was holding a surprisingly _small_ but _elegant_ chocolate cake with fancy ice blue frosting decorating it. The candles were lit and everyone broke out singing "Happy Birthday!"

Alice in her excitement, told me "To make a wish and blow."

Humoring her, I closed my eyes and _pretended_ to wish, before blowing. (I'd given up "wishing" a long time ago.) "What did you wish for?"

"It's a secret," I said, not having the heart at the moment to tell them the truth.

Then "Present time!" I heard Alice sing,

while _everyone_ including _Bella,_ in a big loud chorus shouted " _NO!"_

"Relax you guys, it's _not like_ the last time." She assured the crowd, "It's only _one_ present from all of us. _And_ it's _not wrapped!_ Though it does have a bow… but it's a stick on."

A huge sigh of relief echoed throughout the room.

"Thank you, but you didn't have to do that. You're already paying for my medical," I interjected.

"Well we wanted to, you deserve something fun."

I finally gave in. Jasper led me to the couch where I took my seat next to Emmett and Rosalie, waiting. Alice had disappeared into the back.

Suddenly I heard her voice, telling me to close my eyes until she said "Open".

When she gave the order and I opened my eyes, I couldn't believe it!

There leaning up against the coffee table in front of my knees was a Guitar Case with a hot pink bow stuck on the side! My fingers trembled as I undid the latches, inside was the most beautiful chestnut wooden stringed instrument I'd ever seen. Taking it out and placing on my lap. My fingers started strumming, knowing what to do after all this time.

My eyes were filed with tears as I managed to choke out "Thank you," "I don't know…h- how I'll ever repay you for this"

"It's your birthday Little Soldier. You don't have to do anything Darlin' said Jasper. "But if you insist, how 'bout a song?"

Everybody joined in on that idea.

Obliging, I played the first song that came to mind. To me thinking back, it was the theme I'd been trying to tell everyone:

" _ **Got a call last night from an old friends wife, said I hate to bother you  
But Johnny Ray fell off the wagon, he's been gone all afternoon  
Well, I know my buddy so I drove to Scullys and found him at the bar  
Said, hey man what's goin' on? He said I don't know where to start**_

 _ **Sarah's old car startin' to fall apart and the washer quit last week  
We had to put mama in the nursing home and the baby's cuttin' teeth  
I didn't get much work this week and I got bills to pay  
I said I know this ain't what you wanna hear but it's what I'm gonna say**_

 _ **Sounds like life to me, it ain't no fantasy  
It's just a common case of everyday reality  
Man, I know it's tough but you gotta suck it up  
To hear you talk you're caught up in some tragedy  
It sounds like life to me**_

 _ **Well, his face turned red and he shook his head  
He said you don't understand  
Three kids and a wife depend on me and I'm just one man  
Top it off we just found out that Sarah's two months late  
I said hey bartender set us up a round, we gotta celebrate**_

 _ **Sounds like life to me, ain't no destiny  
Yeah, the only thing for certain is uncertainty  
You gotta hold on tight, just enjoy the ride  
Get used to all this unpredictability  
Sounds like life**_

 _ **Man, I know it's tough but you gotta suck it up  
To hear you talk you're caught up in some tragedy  
Sounds like life to me, sounds like life to me  
Sounds like life, sounds like life to me  
Sounds like life to me"**_

The applause at the end was overwhelming.

I took my new baby to bed with me that night, I could hardly believe it was _mine._ Charlie had to work late at the station and there was leftovers in the fridge, so he called over and asked if we (Bella and I) could spend another night.

Charlie didn't seem to worry as much about me, as long as he knew Dr. Cullen was home.

I was almost asleep when I heard the door creak open. Altering me awake, (Esme had sat me down earlier and explained that I didn't have to leave the bedroom door locked. _Nothing was gonna happen_ to me in this house, she promised.)

"Can I come in?" a voice asked, it was Edward …

I sat up, leaning against the pillow. "What's going on, Hair Gel? You afraid I'm gonna stand up and say "I object" in the middle of the ceremony?" I teased.

He smiled, "No that's not why I'm here. But while we're on the subject, why do you insist on calling me "Hair Gel?"

"In the beginning it was _no_ secret that you annoyed me. Now, consider it a term of endearment. Cause I sure as hell ain't gonna call you "Honey" or "Sweetheart."

Edward frowned at my language but held his tongue. He'd come a long way since our little talk.

"What's on your mind?" I asked, trying to get to the reason for this late night visit.

"I know you didn't make a wish,"

 _mind reader_ I thought. "That and…Alice is trying to see your future based on your wish. It's coming up blank,"

I sighed dramatically. "I don't do wishes, just like I don't believe in fairytales. It's not the way I was raised"

"That's sad," he commented, hanging his head.

"But true, I think of my heart as one of them crystal clear glass ornaments. It's been dropped, shattered and, stepped on time and again. I've got more cracks and sharp jagged edges then I can count. The only part that remains whole and untouched since I found it, is my faith.

Lately though ever since I came to Forks.

The people I've encountered, mainly Charlie, Bella, your family and the wolf pack. Seem to be finding the missing pieces and putting them back together. Once more, I've found myself going against my nature and starting to _Hope._ Giving me that guitar earlier was clear evidence. It's a strange unfamiliar feeling."

Edward raised his head, his expression was that of a light bulb going off. "I'm beginning to think we're a lot alike, you and I. Then we care to admit."

 _What did he mean by that?_ I blinked, _later, later…_

He sighed, "Is there _any_ kind of wish you can think of?"

I took a moment as tears weld up in my eyes. I _did_ have a wish, just one since I was a kid. Taking a breath I whispered:

 _ **"It's something I use to search for… "Home"**_

"What?" he asked,

"My one wish is the same as it's always been: "To Find Home".

"A place that when you're away from, you just miss. Surrounded by your Friends and Family:

People who love and care about you with _no_ strings attached.

"Family, it can be more then with just whom we share blood. You can choose…" Or so I read, it seemed like a sweet dream at the time.

Back when I still could, I'd imagine a loving Mother and Father would come and chose me as their own. Not for what I could give them, but _because_ they _loved me._

Taking me home, I wouldn't care what kind of house, apartment or yard it was. Maybe have one or two other siblings: A big Brother, to beat up the bullies in the school hallway who gave me a hard time. An older Sister, teaching me how to put on make-up and style my hair. Even if they were younger that would be okay too. Playing ball outside or whatever they wanted. I wouldn't care as long as we were together. Having a sleepover at a friend's house and Vis versa. Eating junk food, watching movies. Or just hanging out, spending time…

But it never happened!

At least not fully… (Thinking of Abigail and Ike.)

Between Renee refusing to give up custody and couples interested in others they saw. I was never _chosen._ Something I _wanted to be_ so badly… Dreams and wishes, sooner or later you have to give up. But still, it doesn't hurt to _pretend_ for a while that it's true. Which is why I humor the pack and the imprinting. And besides I know my disease with run its course and that'll be it for me. So I might as well enjoy it while I can…"

I don't remember exactly when I drifted off, but I do know Edward left the bedroom before that.

With Bella and Hair Gel's wedding just around the corner, everybody in the Cullen house. Mainly Alice, was working overtime to get things done. So we could remain on schedule for the appointed date.

So I didn't see much of them after my "birthday".

Charlie, when Bella and I returned. Sat us both down for a "family meeting." It was agreed that since the truth was out now, it would stay out. We just wouldn't tell Renee quite yet.

Let her believe what she wants.

That was a huge weight off my shoulders, _no more secret_!

Seth came by to visit as usual later and Bella asked him a surprising question: "If he wouldn't mind _checking on Jacob from time to time?!"_

As you can imagine, Seth was pretty uncomfortable while I almost blew a gasket.

Instantly, she seemed to realize her mistake and explained herself saying. "She's not planning to go after him, but she wants him to know that she cares."

Jeez! Can't this girl take a hint?

But I left it up to Seth, he said "he'll talk to Sam" and thankfully the conversation ended right there.

Time passed, finally it was the fourth of July.

Nearly two weeks since I last saw the Cullen family. The pack was having double duty patrols since it was a holiday. So Seth wouldn't get off till late.

Charlie was working today on account of the station being short staffed but he was going to meet Bella and I at the Clearwater's in La Push for dinner. Both he and Sue had bonded closely after Harry died. If they weren't careful, I would soon be dating my stepbrother!

EEWWW! Too scary to even think about,

Bella was spending time at her fiancé's house on this rainy afternoon. So that's where I was headed…

When I arrived, I took a seat on the top porch step. I didn't have as much pep as I once had and needed to rest more often.

Tugging off the hood to my rain coat, I reached into the case and took out my baby. Placing on my lap and started playing. I took my guitar almost everywhere with me these days.

It brought me comfort.

I began with a song honoring the day and what it stood for "God Bless the USA". I was so engrossed in what I was doing that it took me awhile to realize I had an audience. Jasper was seated right across from me, smiling with pride and encouragement.

"Go on Little Soldier, what else you gotta say?"

Suddenly Alice's squeal of displeasure could be heard through an upstairs window. "No not _blue_! I said " _silver_ " table cloths!"

I silently shook my head, playing Billy Currington's "People are Crazy". My southern pal was cracking up by the end of it.

Just then Edward pulled his Volvo in the driveway and Bella ran out to meet him. The temptation was just too good that I had to give in: Trisha Yearwood's "She's in love with the Boy" started playing softly in the background.

"Nicki!" my sister scolded, embarrassed.

Little did I know that with every song, more people gather around.

Emmett was towering over my sitting form. "Nick-roo?" he sang,

"What?"

"Where's _my_ song?" I chuckled, I had the perfect song for him.

"What was I thinkin'" by Derks Bentley.

"Nick-roo! _That's not_ my song,"

"Yes, it is!" everyone chorused, though Esme and Carlisle added "Son" to it. Sorry Buddy, it's seven against one. The song stays…

The rains stopped but it was still overcast, after some persuasion on Alice.

It was decided that everyone would take the remainder of the day off, starting fresh tomorrow. The end result was very entertaining.

Together we created sort of a mini carnival, Cullen style.

All from different odds and ends found in storage from the garage:

An old mattress got Velcro stapled to it and became a "sticking wall" for those (meaning: Bella and I, wearing "sticking" suits) who jumped on the small trampoline.

Edward and Jasper found a leftover paint can from repainting the house and dumped it over.

Running some spare tires through it, leaving track marks on a large sheet of construction paper. Then it got really crazy when Emmett took off his shoes and socks before walking in the puddle of paint. Preceding to make "Bigfoot" marks and prints all over the yard.

The other girls and Carlisle alternated between ripping off the sticking wall victims and choosing the music.

It was a pretty hysterically fun time, I could not help but smile and laugh along.

That good mood lasted even throughout the bonfire at La Push. Once we returned "home" though, it was a different story:

Renee called wishing Bella a happy fourth, which I didn't mind.

They talked about what her and Phil did, also fine.

 _Then_ she "asked" about me, putting in her two bits. Demanding to speak to Charlie, specifically wanting conformation that Bella was "still in the Dark."

I stormed into my room, slamming the door. "I couldn't believe that Bi-Woman!

I collapsed on the bed, sobbing into my pillow. "Will this nightmare _ever end_?!" I thought in despair.

As my metal leg kicked, it banged against the bottom drawer of my dresser and it popped open.

Revealing a forgotten item I'd put away months ago:

 _My Bible!_

It was the one Pastor Ike gave me in Juvie, he said "When you're at a loss and don't know what to do? Read God's word, it will give you strength and guidance. If you let it. Prayer helps too. He's always listening…"

I took the book from its resting place and opened it to the Gospel according to John. I read over this one verse repeatedly " _If_ _we confess_ _our sins, he is faithful and just to_ _forgive_ _us our sin. And_ _cleanse_ _us from_ _all_ _unrighteousness_. _"_

Deciding it was worth a shot, I closed my eyes and prayed this silent prayer:

" _ **God, Father?**_

 _ **If I can still call you that?**_

 _ **I confess I'm not perfect.**_

 _ **I don't know or have**_

 _ **All the answers.**_

 _ **But please forgive me**_

 _ **For what I've done and said**_

 _ **I've strayed so far off the path**_

 _ **I can't get back without**_

 _ **Your help.**_

 _ **I beseech you father,**_

 _ **I'm scared**_

 _ **I don't know how to react**_

 _ **To people or trust**_

 _ **Them.**_

 _ **I know they're your children too**_

 _ **And I don't want to keep living like this**_

 _ **So please, teach me**_

 _ **How to see and love them**_

 _ **The way you do.**_

 _ **For however long**_

 _ **I have**_

 _ **Amen**_

 _ **P.S. I forgive Renee."**_

It wasn't easy but I meant that last part for it also says _"For_ _if you do not_ _forgive others,_ _neither_ _will your heavenly Father forgive you…"_

Bella's POV (A month later):

I honestly can't believe the change that has come over Nicki.

She's become like a whole different person. But there's enough familiarly to assure me it's her.

I can see it in her eyes, she's much happier and relaxed now.

Though still not great with people, she's definitely trying. Then again I've never been much of a people person either.

Her speech is an improvement too, surprisingly! She hardly ever swears anymore but the meaning is quite clear in the words she uses.

The real test is going to be on the 7th when Phil and _Renee_ are flying in for the wedding….

Nicki's POV:

Just breathe… In and Out,

 _ **"God, I pray you'll give me the strength and courage I need for this task."**_ I thought as I paced back and forth restlessly in my room.

Waiting for "Mother" to make her grant entrance.

Tonight was Bella's Bachelorette Party, organized and run by Alice. Renee wanted to be there and "join in the fun" with the girls.

Bella and I both agreed to tell her "The jig is up," But the question of "How?" Or "When?" has yet to present itself.

Oh well, no use in worrying or getting worked up. I heard the front door open and close. Followed by, "Bella!" sang Renee. Ugh! Here we go…

I did _not_ want to go out there or see her.

For as long as I could help it. I was just fine to stay in my bedroom until she left. The mere sound of her voice got my anxiety going. Unfortunately, I did not have that option.

My sister only knocked once before barging in. "She's here,"

"Yeah, I know."

"She wants to see you," I groaned in response.

"Come on," she encouraged, taking my hand and leading me down the hallway. "Just like ripping off a Band Aid."

The way I was feeling, I'd rip off a hundred Band Aids before doing this! The amount of I had stress wasn't good for my heart either.

Everyone was in the living room. Charlie was seated in his usual chair with a beer in hand.

If I could, I'd be drinking right along with you, Pops.

"Nicki!" Renee greeted me, excitedly getting up off the couch.

I said nothing in reply. She got her arms around me in a tight "hug" before I say "No touching."

I kept my hands to my side. Clutching and unclutching my fists, trying to relieve the tension in my body.

She noticed I wasn't responding the way she'd hoped. Renee then whispered in my ear: "Please _try_ to at least _act_ happy to see me? I haven't seen you in forever."

I sighed, she was pushing it. "I know you're upset about having keeping the secret," she continued. "But _trust me_ , it's _best_ for everyone."

 _That's was it!_ I was _not_ going to spend _one_ more _second_ of _my_ life, living a lie.

I smiled and whispered back,

" _Everyone_ _knows the truth_ , Renee. And _we're living_ in the _truth_. You can't handle it…? That's _your_ problem. Now, enjoy the party!"

I squealed with fake enthusiasm, stepping with ease out of her "embrace" and retreating back to my bedroom.

Bella's POV:

I couldn't believe Nicki did that. Then again, it's her.

And I pushed her into something she was not ready for. I saw the signs and ignoring them, I pushed anyway…On the other hand, it could have been worse.

Nicki handled it better then she would've a month ago. There would have been yelling and swearing.

So for the most part, I'm grateful of the method she chose. Though the ending reminded me a little of Alice, inappropriately enough. Now I have to deal with Mom…

Because it was whispered, Charlie and I didn't catch what was going on until we saw Renee's expression and heard the end sentence. Mom's face was chalk white and her eyes were huge as they darted from Nicki's bedroom door, to Charlie, and finally… back to _me_.

Before she ran and locked herself in the bathroom.

It took a good hour and a half to get Renee to calm down. Sometimes being the daughter of the Chief of Police has its benefits. Charlie made a spare key to every room in this house, including the bathroom.

And while I was " _handling_ " Mom, Dad took care of Nicki.

She was pretty worked up herself. Laying on her bed with headphones on listening to her Christian music or so he said. Apparently, after getting her calm. Realizing she needed a break, Charlie made a phone call to Sue and asked if Nicki could spend a few nights. Soon _Leah_ pulled up in the family jeep, collected Nick and drove off toward La Push.

Once I got Mom pacified from her breakdown and she could think clearly.

She surprisingly made a wise choice, and chose _not_ to _come_ to the party. She couldn't handle it, hoping I'd understand. That was a first, Renee was usually at any party come rain or shine. This had more effect on her then I thought.

Though I did agree with her decision, in fact I wish there wasn't going to be a party at all.

But Alice wasn't letting me out of this one, saying "This is what brides' do" and she wanted me to have _every_ experience. She was going to be _very_ disappointed as it was with Renee and Nicki not coming. But-

I gotta tell you, after _just_ witnessing what took place between my mother and my sister.

In the safety of our home.

There was no way I could see them attending a party together. God only knows what will happen at my Wedding!

Renee's POV:

I just collapsed on the bed when I got back to my hotel room at the Forks Motel.

Thankfully Phil wouldn't be back until late. I'd told him what I was supposedly doing tonight with Bella.

He said that he wanted to sight see and maybe drive out to Port Angeles.

In Forks, there wasn't much. Which is _one_ of the reasons why I wanted to get away from this town in the first place.

My mom was sick at the time and I so wanted to do better for Bella.

I admit getting married like I did right out of high school, probably wasn't the best choice. But I was young and foolish! That seems to be my excuse for a lot of my behavior during my days as a young adult…

WHY couldn't Charlie keep his blasted mouth shut and stick to our agreement?!

Things would be so much easier!

And did you see the way Nicki reacted to me? Her disgust? Her language?

This was not the little girl I knew! And what is wrong with her legs? And now my baby knows what I've done…Way to go Mom of the year!

Will Bella ever look at me the same? She already knew I wasn't perfect, but now this!

All I ever wanted was the best for her. Can't she understand that? One thing is for sure, tomorrow I'm going to Charlie's and give him and Nicki a piece of my mind!

The next day I stomped into the station, having already tried the house. I slammed the door to his office shut saying "We need to talk,"

"We do indeed." he agreed, glaring at me in anger.

What did _he_ have to be angry about?! "Where's Nicki?" I demanded.

Charlie slapped his papers down on the desk. "Renee! You are here for Bella's Wedding! She wants you here and that's fine. She should have her mother at her wedding. _But_ I absolutely _will not_ tolerate nor _allow_ you to hurt _my_ _other_ daughter again!"

"She's not-"

"Oh yes she _is_! Don't fool yourself! Nicki is my flesh and blood. It was my seed that helped create her. You had _no_ right to do what _you did:_

"You took her away from me and lied about it to my face. I _never_ stopped searching for her. Not because what she could give Bella, but because she was _mine._ My daughter and I love her. Once more, after she came to live with me. I got a court order that gives me full and complete custody. You are so consumed with yourself and what you want. That you don't even _care_ about the damage and hurt you've caused others! Nicki has been through hell these past ten years! _She's dying_! And all you care about is your _f***_ secret! Do what you want while you're here. But I'm warning you: _Stay away from her_ , until the wedding and _even then_ I will be watching…"

Whoa! I couldn't hardly get a word in with him!

It seems my presence and my actions have really shaken things up in this small hick town.

Everyone was watching when Charlie "escorted" me out after his little speech. Not just out his office but out of the station too!

Was it true?

What he was saying about Nicki dying?

She was seriously ill?

The only other person who would know is…?

Guess it's time to face the music…

I was sitting on the front porch waiting, when Bella drove up in the new car that Edward got her. "A Mercedes? That boy has good taste!

"Mom?" my baby greeted me with bags of groceries in her arms

. "Hi Honey," I said holding the door open for her once she unlocked it. "Can I get you something?" she offered putting the bags on the counter.

I seated myself at the kitchen table, "Just water, thank you baby."

She reached into the fridge and took out a bottled water, handing it to me. "Feeling better?" she asked, putting the items away.

"Yeah, about that… Are you sure Charlie told you the truth? Cause-"

"Mom, it wasn't Charlie. Nicki told and _showed_ me the official documents. I know about my cancer and what you guys did to save me."

Now I was really embarrassed. "Oh Sweetie! I was so young and scared, I was gonna lose you. I would have done anything! But I wasn't ready to take on _another child_ any longer then I had to. Nor could I afford it. I saw an out, so I took it. However, I'm starting to realize it was the wrong one…"

"Yes Mom, it was. If you couldn't handle having a kid or two kids… you should have just sent us to Charlie with visitation rights."

"I wanted you, Bella." I admitted, shamefully sounding like a child. "I wanted you with me."

"Then you _should_ have _let_ Dad _take_ Nicki, like normal divorced parents. That way I could still see her from time to time and _know_ I _had_ a sister. Maybe then, things would've been different and Nicki wouldn't be disabled or as sick as she is now?"

I blinked, what?

"Last January, she was in a car accident in which she lost her lower legs and she has a heart problem. That she's dying of. In the last decade, Nicki has gone through a lot, Mom: rape, pregnancy, drugs, smoking, jail, rehab, child birth and death. To list a few. She does not like nor trust most people, especially you. After what you did, playing with her heart like that… I read the letter."

She shook her head. With each word Bella used to describe what Nicki had gone through, my horror and shame grew.

Soon before I realized it, I was sitting on the kitchen floor with my back up against the cupboards and Bella kneeling beside me speaking. But I never heard what she was saying, I was lost in my own thoughts _:_

 _How could I as a mother and a parent, release my child- No!_ _(Actually_ _a_ _child, I wasn't a mother to her, so I certainly have_ _no_ _business calling her "mine.")_ _Into that kind of situation?_ _I endangered her!_

 _They could have been messing with her each time I came to "visit"?!_

 _There were so many opportunities where I could have listened to her and gotten her out of there._

 _Bella is right, I should have sent her to Charlie._

 _Come to think of it. The only time I can actually think of when she was_ _safe_ _and_ _happy_ _was with "Martha?" Jezebel?" or whatever her name was…_

Pity she died though, according Nicki's last letter she sent me.

 _I have wronged her so many times and so many different ways_ _…_ _No wonder she HATES me!_

Now to hear, she's got no legs and is dying because of her heart.

The last thing she needs is to put up with my crap because of a

 _STUPID secret_ _being blown._ _Which is my fault in the first place!_

 _If I hadn't been such a coward and told the truth. I will listen to Charlie and keep my distance till the Wedding. Then when I see her,_ _I'll make a promise to no longer interfere in any aspect of her remaining life._ _I owe her this much…_

 _One thing is for sure:_ _I really screwed up, didn't I?_

Nicki's POV (5 days later):

Well here it is… the big day has arrived.

My sister and her immortal Bo are finally tying the knot.

And soon Bella will be a Vampire, I'm not quite sure how it feel about that.

But it's her life and I've got mine, for at least a while anyway.

Try not to think about it…

Today is a supposed "happy" day. I'd been staring at myself in the floor length mirror in Leah's bedroom.

The image that reflected back wasn't great but it'll do.

Though I may seem cool and confident in a lot of ways…When it comes to my body, there's always been insecurities.

Where Bella is a fair skinned bean pole, resembling Renee.

I on the other hand, am 5.1 ft., slightly on the side of plump, with a body shaped like a pear. My last weigh in at the doctor said I was 130 lbs. (140 lbs. actually when my "metal legs" are attached.)

I don't really scream "dress material". Plus, I didn't wish to have my prosthetics showing for everyone to stare and gawk at.

Alice had designed the wedding as coat and tie. Judging by the bridesmaid dresses, everything below the knee was visible with the exception of Bella's gown and Rosalie's (which was slit from the hip.) So despite Alice's objection, I was doing something nontraditional but still formal: a black pants suit.

After the outfit was on, Sue took me into the bathroom to do my hair.

Yeah, you heard me right… _"Hair."_

See, ever since Alice found out about my baldness and the wig. She's been giving me Rogaine treatments.  
My original hair is back. This was the first day I was going to be showing it off.

Among other things, I'd also gone and inherited Charlie's tan skin tone and color hair: "Black." Short, wavy black, with curls at the end. I eventually emerged wearing a blue headband before walked out to join Seth.

As a thank you for helping defeat Victoria and her army, the people who were in or involved with the pack was invited to the Wedding. Though only Sue, Seth and Billy were going.

I'll never be able to thank the Clearwaters and Charlie enough for allowing me to stay.

The moment I'd stormed back in my room after having confronted Renee. I had _no_ idea _how_ I was going to make it the rest of the time with her there. Then I left with Leah and arrived here.

It's been a relief, not having to worry. It's has been received like a much needed vacation.

Between hanging out with the other imprints, the pack and spending time on the beach. Playing my guitar against the sound of those waves.

I must say though, I was surprised that Alice didn't call in hysterics that I wasn't at the bachelorette party. I holding on to hope Bella explained. So here I was going back into the fray but this time I wasn't alone so that's a comfort…

Esme answered the door,

"Seth, Nicki! Come on in" she invited warmly.

I gave her a hug in response, I couldn't help it.

After a moment she pulled back to look at me, "Nicki, you're so cute!"

I blushed, "Thanks."

"Are you feeling better? You know if it gets to be too much with Renee, you can always come stand or sit by me" she whisper offered in my ear.

Touched, I smiled and nodded "yes".

Then Esme reached out to snag a stray strand of hair and tucked it behind my ear. Surprised, she gasped in wonder.

"Yes, it is real. And it's really mine, thanks to Alice."

"You're welcome!" the familiar pixie squealed as she flashed down the stair case temporarily join us. "Let me see the finish product," she said, turning me around in a circle. Then clapped her hands, very impressed before retrieving something from the flower basket on the counter. It was a small but beautiful white rose which she tucked between my hair and the left side of my headband. "Perfect!" chirped Alice before dashing back upstairs "Still so much to do for the bride…" she sang.

I shook my head with empathy. Poor Bella was going to resemble a china doll before Alice was through.

Well they did it!

Bella and Edward finally made it to the altar and the eternal vows of "I do" were exchanged. I got a vampire for a brother-in-law! (Cheers to working _that_ out in therapy.)…

Just kidding! I of course will continue to honor my word and not say anything.

At this point, I feel there's no end to how deep the rabbit hole goes. Rest assured, I can deal with the March Hare and the Mad Hatter. But I swear, the moment the Queen of Hearts pops up demanding my head. I'm outta here!

We were at the reception. I took turns dancing with all the Cullens, including Edward.

"You be good to her" I whispered as we waltzed to a slow jazz tune.

"I can honestly promise you that, Nicki." He whispered back, though frowning slightly. "How are you feeling?"

Aside from the Renee drama, my health had really taken a turn down hill in the past month.

Including one brief overnight stay at Forks Hospital. I was stable now, though experiencing more chest pain from time to time.

"I'm alright for the most part, everything appears to be functional."

"Are you sure?"

I smiled and nodded.

I can't blame Hair Gel for being worried, after all he was the one who found me passed out on the floor in the bathroom of my own house.

I'd been in taking a shower when my heart began to pound abnormally in my chest. It wasn't from the heat of the water either, I had it on warm. Starting to get dizzy, I shut it off and wrapped a huge thick towel around myself before stepping out. Unfortunately the moment I placed a foot on the floor is when I collapsed on the tile. Apparently at the same time, Edward had entered the house through my sister's window. Intending to surprise her, instead heard a loud thump and discovered my body. Luckily Bella arrived home shortly after. Dressing me in sweats, she and Edward took me to the hospital where I awoke.

Since then he's been overly protective of me. It's kind of nice and strange all at once.

When the song ended, people changed partners. I was surprised to find _Renee_ be the one to take my hand.

I instantly pulled back, releasing my limb. But before I escape and walk away she said,

"Nicki, please just listen to me this one time. And I _promise,_ I'll leave you alone from here on out."

I sighed, if that's what it takes…

"Fine, talk" I answered, crossing my arms. "What on earth could you possibly have to say to me that hasn't already inflicted hurt and damage?"

Her next words surprised and shocked me to my core. "I'm sorry,"

What?

"I am sorry for everything," she repeated before continuing. "For all the hurt and pain I put you through over the years. You didn't deserve it, and that's my fault."

I blinked rapidly, looking into her eyes. Trying to see if she was serious.

"But…" I put in before she could, expecting it to follow.

"No… no "buts" this time. I am truly and honestly _sorry_. It also wasn't fair of me to dump "the secret" burden on you to keep. On top of everything else you're going through…" she trailed off sadly.

Bella told her, didn't she?

"I can see it now, why you hate me and reacted so coldly."

I sigh heavily, needing to speak the truth. "I _don't hate_ you,"

I corrected, "I've forgiven you and your actions against me… But I _don't trust_ you _nor do I want you_ in my life. Too much irreversible damage has been done."

She slowly nodded, "I can accept that… Just please know: I wish you the best, Nicole Ann Swan"

I allowed her to give me one last hug before walking off, going our separate ways…

The rest of the party was pretty good.

In fact Seth stole me away to a private corner where we shared our first kiss.

It was perfectly slow and sweet the way our lips met. Lingering for a minute, our finger intertwining in each other's hair before parting. Not how everyone's first kiss is but just right for us.

I was blushing like crazy, and I wasn't the only one. Seth seemed to be mirroring my feelings exactly.

"Fortunately" or "Unfortunately", depending on how you look at it. The embarrassment didn't last long.

Out of all the surprises that day, _Jacob_ had come back and decided to crash the party!

Of course he and Bella saw each other and talked. Then trust my sister to have a doofus moment, tell him something very crucial about the "Wedding Night." Igniting that nasty wolf temper of his.

Seth and the pack had to step in and reinforce Jacob _before_ he exploded in furious fur and fangs and _attempted_ to _murder_ Edward.

Seth then left with the pack, wolf business came first as usual. Though I appreciated the winking glance he sent my way just before departing. No doubt the boys would be teasing him when they found out what we'd done.

It wasn't long after that we (the remaining guests) wished Bella and Edward "Bon Voyage" as they drove off to start their honeymoon.

I went home with Charlie, completely exhausted.

(Six weeks later) Seth's POV:

The sun is coming up now, Jake's still past out on the floor, sleeping.

He's probably gonna be upset that I didn't wake him when I came to check at midnight.

But honestly, he does need his rest.

He's been going nonstop for two going on three days ever since we'd found out the truth of Bella's condition:

She's pregnant!

That's not good news or bad news, its _Scary News!_

Why? You may ask,

it's not a normal one. Then again, nothing about this situation is "normal".

The pack or rather my _formal_ pack believe the Baby's a Monster which needs to be destroyed. So in order to protect Bella and the child. Jake broke away from Sam and I followed.

Together we've "unofficially" formed our own pack that Leah's joined, surprisingly! But understandable once she "explained" her need to get away from Sam. I used quotation because nothing in a pack is a secret. Stuff gets revealed whether you want it to or not…

It's been _weeks_ since I've seen my Nicki.

She had another bad episode within days after the wedding and had taken up residency at the Harborview Medical Center in Seattle.

It hurt not seeing her everyday but I'd always managed to get a phone call in. And I rode along with Charlie whenever he drove down to see her almost every other weekend.

It wasn't enough, but I understood why she needed to be there. This right now was the longest I'd gone without contacting her. Maybe I could ask sometime today if I could use the phone.

Aha!

Later that morning after Jake woke up and took some food and clothes to Leah, (Curtesy of Esme.) I made my move.

Though ended up having to explain/catch the Cullens plus Bella up on Nicki and her worsening condition. They hadn't seen or heard from her since the wedding either.

Alice was shocked that she didn't see it in her visions. Esme's heart went out to Charlie: As far as he was concerned, _both_ of his children were terribly sick and there was nothing he could do for them.

I eventually got ahold of my angel. It felt so good to hear her sweet voice though pained as it were.

We just barely talked for five minutes, when the whole house rang with Edward's shout of "Because you've given me no choice! Bella were supposed to be partners remember. But you decided this on your own, you've decided to leave me… Well I have no other way to see it. Cause it's me who will lose you and I don't choose that… I don't choose that." The next thing I heard was a door slamming shut.

"Seth?" "Seth?" my angel asked coming through the phone.

"Yes, sorry about that Nick," I apologized.

"Can I talk to my sister?"

"Sure, I'll ask" before going and knocking on the door of the room Bella occupied.

"Come in" she said tearfully,

"Bella its Nicki on the line, do you feel like talking to her?"

Sniffling, she nodded eagerly. I handed her the phone, walking out of the room.

Trying to give them some privacy but with me and supernatural wolf hearing, I got every word:

Nicki: Hi Sis, so it seems congratulations are due?"

Bella: "Thanks Nicki, you're the only one besides Rosalie that seems actually happy about the baby."

Nicki: "You forget, I was a mother for however brief amount of time it was. It's a miraculous thing isn't, to know and experience that another "being" is growing and developing inside you."

Bella: _Yes!_ Thank you! No one else seems to be getting that!

Nicki: I think they get it just fine Bella, but their worry and concern for you overrides it. From what Seth has told me: Baby's not regular, is it?"

Bella (chokes out): No, he's half vampire."

Nicki: "He? So you know what it's going to be?"

Bella: "No it's just a guess,"

Nicki: "And big daddy vampire doesn't seem too happy with the idea of his future offspring?"

Bella: "Was he really that loud?"

Nicki: "Yep,"

Bella: "He'll come around."

Nicki: "You hope,"

Bella: "I know he will if he just…gives him a chance."

Nicki: "And what if he doesn't Bella?"

Bella: "He will!" (she screeched desperately into the phone.)

Nicki: "Bella! Bella, you're hormonal, but you've got to listen to me. Just this once, alright?"

Bella: "Ok,"

Nicki: "You _can't force_ someone to _be_ a _parent_. They _have to want_ it and _be willing to_ work for it. For when you become a parent, your wants are on the back burner. _Your child's needs come first!_ You need to think about _what's best for EJ?_ Especially, if you don't make it. That in itself is a chance _every_ mother _takes_ upon bringing a child into the world. My advice to you is: Create a back-up plan. So whatever happens, whether Edward accepts the child or not. _You know_ your son is in safe hands with people who will love and protect him. Like Emmett and Rosalie for example, if it came down to that."

(Silence… then)

Bella: "Thank you Nicki,"

Nicki: "You're Welcome."

Bella: "You must really miss him…Noah, I mean"

Nicki: "Yeah, I do"

Bella: "Do you regret anything?"

Nicki: "How it started and ended maybe, but as far as his existence… Not a day. I treasure every moment we had together. A small bouncy, red, chubby faced baby with a smile and a laugh to warm your heart."

Bella: "I hope I get that lucky,"

Nicki: "You will…I've got a feeling…"

A month later, (Oct.31st to be exact)

Renesmee's ("Nessie") POV:

I was sitting with my Jacob outside on the porch, taking a moment to rest.

Aunties Alice and Rosalie just got done putting me through a "fashion show"? Or whatever it is you call it where you put on different outfits and take pictures.

Tonight was supposedly Halloween, a holiday where you dress up in a costume and go "trick or treating' around the neighborhood and get lots of candy! I love candy, it tastes a lot better than that icky "Baby Formula" Grandpa Carlisle made me try.

It was so quiet in the yard, I couldn't help but notice something's missing?

"Jake?"

"Yes, Nessie?"

"Where's Leah and Seth?"

"They're at home in La Push, Sweetheart"

"Why?" I asked,

"Because today a very special friend is going to be visiting. And she's come a long way to see them."

"Who?"

"Do remember your Momma telling you about your Aunt Nicki?"

I remember now, Auntie Nicki is a human like Grandpa Charlie but she's very sick. So she lives in a hospital, like the place Grandpa Carlisle works at but it's far away.

If Jake is bringing her up that means… "I'm gonna finally meet my Auntie?!" I was excited,

"Yes, she is Seth's imprint" he smiled.

"Did I hear that right?!" boomed Uncle Emmett, "Nicki-roo's coming to visit!"

I started laughing, he was practically doing a happy dance.

 _"Nicki's coming?"_

Before I could blink, Momma, Daddy, Grandma and Grandpa, and all my aunts and Uncles were out there joining.

"Yeah, Charlie put in a request a couple weeks ago to have her for the next two days." My Jacob explained, "They're probably going to swing by later. She really wanted to see Seth first."

I think I understand, if I were away for a long time from Jake. I'd want to see him too.

"But she'll stop by later? Maybe go trick or treating with us?" I put in hopefully,

"If she feels up to it Nessie. Last time I saw her through Seth's mind, she looked pretty tired and worn out" said Jacob.

Then suddenly Auntie Alice's eyes went blank. She was having a vision, thankfully it was a short one.

"Charlie's coming, he's turning down the drive way right now. He wants to see Bella and Renesmee. Plus he has something to ask us, concerning Nicki."

"What is it Alice?"

"He…he wants to know if we can save her…like Bella."

Charlie's POV:

A lot has changed over these last few months,

my oldest got married and had a kid of her own. (Though the cover story is adoption, I'd recognize those familiar dark brown eyes anywhere.

 _"Strange"_ or _"Weird",_ two words that seem to be popping up quite frequently in my head whenever I visit this house. I know now, there's a story behind that family. But it's one _I don't want_ to know _nor do I need to_.

According to Bella, which I _totally_ agree with.

It's hard enough to grasp that my best friend's son and the woman I'm dating's children _turn_ into very large dogs.

None the less… getting back to the Cullens.

 _Whatever_ they _did_ to save Bells, it _worked_. And it doesn't matter that her skin is firmer and her body temperature is cooler. _She's still here and she's healthy!_ Is it wrong to want the same thing for Nicki?

Stepping out of the cruiser I was surprised to find them all gathered on the porch, waiting.

Jacob was there too, sitting next to Nessie before she got up and ran towards me. "Grandpa!" she squealed as I scooped her up in my arms giving her a hug. Then began walking towards them.

A half hour later after visiting: seeing how everyone was and polite chit chat like that.

I did inform them Nicki _was here_ and I'd just dropped her off at La Push before coming. She might stop in that night, depending on what her and Seth had planned.

Speaking of which, ever since Nicki came to live with me. I've always known they were close but lately I can't help but wonder: _How close?_

That thought aside, it was time to bring up my secondary reason for coming here.

So I asked to speak to Dr. Cullen privately.

He agreed and showed the way to his study. I couldn't help but be impressed when I entered. The walls were cover in oil paintings, including a family portrait. Awards, shelves filled sky high with books. Not just Medical, everything from Science to Philosophy. Taking a seat behind his desk, he gestured to the chair in front of him.

"What can I do for you, Charlie?" he asked, appearing so human but I've come to know that's not necessarily the case.

"I never got to tell you, how grateful I am for what was done to save Bella."

Dr. Cullen raised an eyebrow, "You're Welcome Charlie"

I took a deep breath, this wasn't an easy thing to admit.

"Nicki…is dying. We've all known that fact for a while now. But watching her deteriorate so rapidly like she's been doing these last few months has been an unbearable wakeup call and to know it's far from over…

Dr. Cullen I appeal to you as a father and a doctor. Is there _anything_ you can _do_ or _know of_ that would _save_ my little girl? _Even_ at _this_ stage? Like that treatment Bella went through? And I don't care about the "change". She's alive and that's what matters."

"Charlie" he sighed, "That "treatment" is very dangerous. Especially the _after effects_ , we got lucky with Bella."

"You mean the patients hardly survive?"

"No Charlie, quite the contrary. The survival rate is pretty high, but in normal cases of "the recovery" process. It is usually extremely dangerous for the "patients" to be around people, at least until the next year after. Supervised and even then, something could go wrong."

I swallowed, there was a chance I couldn't see my daughter for an entire year?! _Well… I don't care_. She'll be alive, that's the main thing!

"Whatever it takes… Dr. Cullen, I'm willing to do whatever it takes to save her life."

"Charlie, _please_ let me continue to explain the consequences of this. _Before,_ you make your final decision. By choosing this path, you will _have to_ give _up_ Nicki,"

What?! No Way! I just got her back…

"The treatment _does_ save lives Charlie, but its effects, though lessening over time. Are severely permanent. Resulting in a total and completely different change and lifestyle. It would not be safe nor wise for the both of you to continue living together under the same roof."

"What would you suggest?" I asked, desperately. If it was true that she couldn't stay with me, I wanted to make sure she'd go to a _safe_ , _permanent_ place where she'd have the best care. And not be tossed around from place to place, like when she was in the system.

I wasn't prepared for what he said next:

"Would you be willing to let us adopt Nicki?"

What?

"Every member of my family, including myself are trained and prepared to handle these situations. We've all been helping and guiding Bella since she went through it."

I got to thinking: if it was them….Nicki already knows and trusts them… for the most she stayed in this house? There'd still be a small chance I'd see her occasionally.

" _If_ and _when_ it's deemed safe for her to be around people? You'd grant me visitation to see her like Bella?"

"Of Course Charlie," the kind doctor assured me.

 _"Then…yes, I'll do it."_

Esme's POV:

I sat on the couch with Renesmee on my lap as I watched my children pace back and forth.

Waiting, listening to Carlisle and Charlie.

I knew we shouldn't eaves drop, it's rude. But it honestly cannot be helped with the way our senses are. The best we can do is give them the illusion of privacy.

And I can't quite blame the children either,

I'm a little curious myself.

Part of me is really excited at the idea of gaining another child. _Nicki_ …  
that poor girl has it so tough, she's never really gotten a break for years… until now.

"Grandma?"

"Yes honey?"

"Is it true what Grandpas' are talking about? Auntie Nicki, Mommy's sister might be coming to live with us as a vampire?"

"It looks that way, sweetie. If everything works out?"

After ten more minutes both my husband and Charlie came out of the room. Then Charlie said his goodbyes and left.

The moment the door shut and he drove off. Carlisle faced us and said "Family meeting in the dining room…and Jacob? You're free to attend as well. We'll be needing your input too. Then went you go home you can discuss it with Seth and the rest of your pack." He nodded gruffly, grabbing an extra chair to bring to the table.

Once everyone was seated, my husband called the meeting to order.

"Alright everyone, we all were there when Alice had her vision and my recent talk with Charlie confirmed it. So there's no need to second guess what this meeting is about: _"The Vote for Nicki's Immortality"_. We decided as a family whether or not to bring Bella in, now we must do the same for Nicki. Edward?"

"No, Carlisle it wouldn't be right to condemn her to this life. She's deserves better than this. Rosalie help me out here?" he implored,

"Sorry "Hair Gel" you're on your own."

"Ouch! Good One Rose!" Emmett high fived her across the table.

Edward meanwhile was flabbergasted until he found his voice. "I can believe you Rosalie! Where's your big fight for humanity? Don't tell me you _actually like_ being a Vampire now?"

"Of _course_ not! My attitude and feelings on the subject remain the same. But this _isn't_ about me, it's about _her_. Any problems I had with her _died_ on that fateful trip to Seattle hospital in May. Unlike Bella, she _literally_ has _no future_ as a human… Other than death and even now as we speak a little more of her precious life is being ripped away. So…Yes, Carlisle."

He nodded but I could tell my husband was indeed surprised. It was _rare_ that he and Rose agreed on _anything._

"Nicki-roo? Comin' to stay as a permanent member of our Vamp Club? Hell Yeah!"

"Emmett!" I scolded my son, "There are young _children_ present!"

"Listen to your Mother, but I appreciate the enthusiasm" said Carlisle. So it was two "Yes" and one "No".

Bella spoke up,

"My sister and I were separated when we were young. These last months since she's been back have been in a word: "interesting". Knowing now what happened since she left my parent's care. I can't blame her for turning out the way she has. Yet I still see the smidgen of the tiny girl I knew shine through occasionally. The most recent time was that phone call a month ago. Her voice was so nice and tender the way she talked about Renesmee and her own son when he was alive. Seth explained, Jasper's explained and finally Jacob's explained too: That her tough behavior is like a mask she wears to protect herself from those around her. Since she's disabled and sick. I for one would love the chance to get to know her again. To see what she's like in a better state of health. Then maybe _with time_ we'll all get to see the _real_ her behind the mask of emotions, Yes."

"I want Auntie Nicki to be happy and healthy Grandpa, so "Yes" voted Renesmee.

"Little Soldier's earned her place in our troops as far as I'm concerned, Yes" said Jasper smiling, he's missed her so badly.

"She's going to be absolutely stunning, yes" Alice agreed.

"You already know my vote, Carlisle" I told my husband. He nodded,

"Eight to One, looks like you're getting a new sister… "Jacob?" Leaving the final decision up to the alpha wolf…

Jacob's POV:

This the second time I found myself faced with the decision to have one of my friends turn into a leech.

Sorry, old habits die hard.

But any blood sucker _outside_ of the _Cullens_ is my enemy.

The question is can I allow another one to be unleashed into the world?

Now don't get me wrong!

Bella and I are _still_ best friends and her daughter is my imprint and Nicki is Seth's. He's always liked the Cullens…

Normally I wouldn't allow this to happen to an imprint but it _will_ save her life.

I looked around, they were waiting patiently for my answer. I held three fingers up, "As long as she drinks animal blood, doesn't attack humans and you've have Seth's okay…Then its fine by me"

"Thank you Jacob" said Dr. Fang, "I promise we'll do our best and I think Seth will understand."

Seth's POV:

I think this has been the best day I've had in a long time.

Trick or Treat?

Well this has defiantly been a treat, my angel's here!

Her gorgeous dark hair is longer now but I can see how weary she is from the bags under her eyes. She's growing worse all the time. I know it wouldn't be long now though. I didn't see what I'm going to do without her.

"If there's a way to save her? Please do it! I-I'll do anything!" I thought as I laid there in the sand as a wolf on first beach.

Nicki was leaned up against me, stroking my fur absent mindedly. The members of Sam's pack had walked by earlier, giving sympathetic glances.

Since Nessie's birth and Jake's imprinting, the treaty had been renewed and peace between the packs was stronger than ever. Our small pack had even grown. Quil and Embry, Jacob's best buddies had joined and my sister was now second in command. As if being the oldest wasn't enough of a reason for her to boss me around… Good news, was I _wasn't_ the _only_ one who's having to _take it_ this time.

"Seth!" Speak of the dog,

I raised my head in answer as she walked up to us. "Jacob wanted to see you down at the ticks' right away,"

Don't call them that! I growled even though she couldn't understand me at the moment.

"Sorry, I know they're _your_ friends." I inclined my head to Nicki's resting form.

She sighed, "I'll take your place while you run down there and see what's going on." Running behind the bushes and emerging as a wolf.

I carefully crawled out as she scooted in. Once Nicki was comfortably situated, I took off for the Cullens as fast as I could go…

As I trotted up to the deck, I became vaguely aware that I hadn't changed back. Jacob was waiting for me,

"Seth, listen buddy we need to talk about Nicki."

I slightly tilted my head, to show intrigue.

"They- the Cullens and Bella want to save her…by changing her."

I felt my pupils dilate as the thought and realization of the proposal set in.

Could I live with the thought of my angel as a vampire? She'd became my natural enemy, but No I could never _hate_ or want to _kill_ her. Just look at Jake and Nessie. She's part vampire and yet they make it work. Plus she'll be a Cullen, so it won't be so bad…

"You know what this means, but it will ultimately _save_ her life… or so they claim."

"It will, Jacob" said Alice. The whole family had come out.

"Seth, I promise I will take good care of Nicki and you'll be able to see her all the time. Since your scent and blood won't appeal to her." explained the Doc.

The minute I nodded my head up and down, my ears picked up Edward's signature groan. Having once lived with them, you'd pick up on these things.

"Seth said "yes" to the transformation" he translated.

"Son, it's not going to be that bad. You're gaining a sister." Esme attempted to console him while Bella handled Nessie.

None the less he stormed up stairs into I guess his old room and slammed the door.

"Why does daddy not want Auntie Nicki to join us?"

"It's complicated Sweetie, but don't worry. He'll come around soon enough, he always does." Bella tried to assure her daughter. Though a momentary flicker of doubt lingered on her face, when Renesmee wasn't looking.

"He's got a hang up on humanity, plus I think he doesn't like the idea of having another immortal bugger in this family who _won't_ put up with his crap!" Emmett blurted out.

A loud bark interrupted any further comment.

I turned my head in the direction of the sound. Leah was behind the trees! Where was Nicki?! I bolted going to meet her, she'd better have a good explanation. Nothing surprised me more to find… _Nicki_ on top my sister, riding her like horse! I would have laughed if I wasn't so worried.

"She woke up and wanted you. What was I supposed to do?" was her alibi.

"I'm sorry Seth, but I've only got less than 48 hours here and I don't want to miss a thing, my Nicki said.

Suddenly the Aerosmith song of the same name started playing. "You are hilarious!" we both echoed,

"Payback! Lady and Gentleman! Payback!... Now if you all would be good little doggies and _fetch_ Nicki-roo from behind that there tree, we'd be much obliged!" shouted Emmett.

Nicki's POV:

It's now or never, I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous about my recently discovered fate.

Growling, Leah followed Jacob's orders stepping out behind the trees and coming to a stop in front of the Cullens, my sister, and my niece. I was surprised and happy when I found out it was a girl and she _still_ had _both_ of her parents.

The movement of Leah's legs from under me, reminded me of what natural walking felt like. If being a vampire was my destiny, just like Abigail once told me. I couldn't help but wonder: " _Would I get my legs back?"_ My _real_ legs? To once more be able to feel dirt and the grass between my toes? Sounds like a dream, yet I know it's real and there's a price… But just _how_ deep is it?

Carlisle came up and slowly and gently lifted me from Leah's back. Rather than refuse further help, like I would have done in the past. Once he placed me on my feet, I leaned against him for support as we walked towards the family. Though tired, I managed a small smile. "Hello,"

Everyone minus Renesmee stared at me in shock. I could see why, I'd always kept my vow before of "I _don't_ do vulnerable" around these people. And here I was doing just that, by accepting help. But I honestly didn't care much anymore, I needed it.

Next thing I knew, they swarmed in a circle. Each took turns embracing me. I even got down on my knees to Renesmee's level where we exchanged greeting hugs.

Sweet girl, looks just like her mother, but there's a bit of her father in there too and I'm not just talking about the hair color. While his, looks like somebody stuck too much Hair Gel in and moussed it up, hers was dazzling chestnut ringlets that tumbled from her shoulders. She put her hand to my cheek and I saw a vision of my face.

"I know I look terrible. That's what happens to us humans when we don't feel good, Sweetheart" I explained to her.

"But it won't be that way for long. Grandpa's gonna fix you, right? He said so"

I looked at Carlisle, "Do you want me to save you, Nicki?"

Then I looked around me at all the hopeful faces, both human and wolf. Raising my eyes to the heavens and prayed. Finding the strength and encouragement, I turned my head back to the Vampire Doc and nodded.

The reaction I got was the same one from when I'd finally shared my story: Cheering and applause… The only questions left are:

Am I ready? And how do I say goodbye to Charlie?

Bella's POV:

That was without a doubt the best visiting encounter with my little sister I've had yet.

And I can't wait for more when she moves in and turns.

The whole time she was here, I saw the kind, caring girl. I'd talked about at the vote.

Speaking of which, I still had to deal with the man I called "husband".

Since Nicki would be staying in the Cullen house with Esme and Carlisle. She'd be taking Edward's old room. Which _should_ be just fine since we lived in the small cottage a short distance from here with Renesmee.

But I gotta say though, after his little tantrum about the vote had me worried.

So when it came time for Nicki to go back to Charlie's, (She'd tagged along for Trick or Treating.) I asked Jacob if he wouldn't mind taking Renesmee with him as they escorted her "home." "Edward?"

I tried the door but it was locked, I'm not proud of it – but I ended up ripping the door off its hinges.

He stood up and walked over. "Bella? Love? I'm sorry, I thought you were Esme…Is Nicki gone?"

"You know she is."

Oh um did you give her my regards?"

I crossed my arms, "Ah… No, I didn't believe it would be appropriate given the circumstances." He sighed, "Look love, I'm sorry but I don't think being changed into a vampire is right for _any_ human. It condemns their soul, I mean look what I've done to you-."

(Slap) _"How dare you?!"_ I shouted, "You _are not_ the one who decides that Edward!"

Surprise didn't even begin to describe the expression he had as he sat down on his couch rubbing the side of his cheek where I got him.

Then I continued more calmly, "I thought you'd changed. For the better, these last few months. "Whatever happened to "I've got _no_ _right_ to put Humanity up on a pedestal? Or "Free Will _to choose_?"

He just pinched the bridge of his nose and hung his head as usual.

"Well I've got something to say to you Edward, and you're not going to like it. "I see you regressing back to that _moronic_ seventeen year old _boy._ Who left me in the woods for "my own" good? All because he felt I deserved a "normal" life: Complete and utter _Bullshit!_ "

That got him, he stared at me horrified! For _me_ to bring _that_ up, told him I was dead serious.

"I'm only going to tell you this once Edward, I'm _through_ with _boys._ I need a _man_ , and Renesmee needs a _father_. You _can_ be that or not? But my daughter comes first! Take tonight and think it over, we'll be at the cottage."

I walked out of that room, past my family. Took Renesmee from Jacob (They were back early, I only hope she didn't hear too much.) and treaded off into the night…

3rd Person's POV:

The entire house was silent upon Bella and Nessie's departure.

At first Esme wondered if she should go up and talk to Edward. But Carlisle assured her that he would handle it.

So after about an hour of letting him think or sulk over Bella's words (as the case most definitely was.)

Carlisle decided enough was enough and politely asked his son to go for a hunt with him. As suspected, Edward refused. His father sighed, his son wasn't leaving him any choice. He rubbed his eyebrows in defeat. "Then…since you're acting like a child, I'm forced to treat you like one."

He arched an eyebrow, _you wouldn't-?!_

But his father's thoughts told otherwise. "You _are_ going, Son." Just as sure as a chilled fall breeze blowing through the upstairs window, Emmett and Jasper were at his side…

A short time later, outside of Victoria B.C. Canada.

The Cullen boys, (including Edward) finished up their hunt and sat recuperating on the grass. Once their "common" senses returned, of course the youngest (currently both mentally and physically) wanted to head back (and hide away in his room.) He was still hurt over his "wife's" words from earlier.

" _How could she?"_ he repeated to himself.

Unfortunately it wasn't an option, Emmett and Jasper were still standing "Guard." "Son" Carlisle began, "I know you're hurt-."

"I don't want to talk about it!" Edward shouted, jumping to his feet.

"Too bad,"

Before he could run .Jasper without warning, tackled him to the ground with ease and sent a heavy dose of mental paralyses to the section of the brain that controlled his legs. Edward could only sit there slumped on the forest floor. He could still think, communicate, and comprehend? What was being said,

Carlisle tried to speak to his son again. "Edward, Sometimes in life. Stuff is said that we don't like or want to hear _but_ we _need_ to hear. And I'm sure that it was hard on Bella to say those things. She loves you very much."

"I'm not sure I still believe that," he mumbled.

"Oh Gimme a break man! After all the two of you have been though!" Emmett shouted, exasperated.

"But she said-"

"Dude! She said "If you want her, you have to grow up and be a man!" Times have changed, Bella's already a mother. She's _not_ gonna _raise_ Renesmee _and_ her seventeen year old _husband!"_

"I'm a hundred and ten!"

"Then _act_ like the _understanding_ responsible _adult,_ you've been portraying the last few months" Jasper suggested. "Because that's _who_ she's in love with and _the man_ Renesmee _knows_ as her father."

All was quiet for about thirty minutes then…

"I'm sorry, you were right. You all were, I've been stupid and foolish. I just got so freaked out at the voting." Edward confessed,

"I understand son, having a newborn around the house is a scary thing. No newborn that I've ever met acted like Bella did when she woke up. They were all wild. Even you, if you remember?" Carlisle tried to comfort his son.

"It's not that, I felt like I was back in the past when we voted before. In my mind, I wasn't trying to save Nicki. I was trying to save Bella and protect her soul. It was only after I went to my room that I came back to the present. Realizing what I'd done then I stood by it. I don't want this life for Nicki. I still blame myself for what I did to Bella's pure soul. I tried to explain that until she hit me. Now I don't know what to do or say.

"So don't do anything," Jasper advised. "You know it upsets her, so do not bring it up and keep your opinion to yourself."

"Dude, I wouldn't worry about her "soul"… as for her smacking you, have you forgotten that she punched werewolf boy as a human?"

Carlisle however was very quiet and thoughtful:

 _"Edward, son…I've been thinking on something Nicki once shared with me months back. The more I think about it now, the more it makes sense. "Everyone's walk with God is different_ _: He leaves it up to the individual person to decide in life where they are going afterwards_ _" So_ _instead_ _of focusing on the_ _assumption_ _that we all are condemned. You should be more focused on_ _yourself_ _and_ _your soul_ _. The Scripture says: "Earth to Earth and Dust to Dust."_ _And well Edward, you are not dust yet…"_

32 hours later, Nicki's POV:

I laid there in my hospital bed. Watching the clock, 10:07 pm. I'd been readmitted three hours ago.

Saying "Goodbye" to Charlie was harder than I originally thought. I guess we sort of bonded a little bit since I came to live with him. (I know that I'd definitely grown fond of him anyway.) He'd been one of the better caretakers I've ever had. Now I wasn't gonna see him for a year.

Charlie and Seth had been my only constant visitors. So I can honestly say I would miss him.

When I got home from visiting on Halloween. Charlie sat me down an explained about the "recently discovered" treatment that he and Dr. Cullen discussed that would "help" me. But as I figured earlier, there'd be a price.

To go through this treatment, meant Charlie would have to give up rights to me.

"Apparently," I'd be a danger to the public for a while. "My father" said that he wasn't doing this lightly. If it was _any_ other _way_ , he'd keep me in a heartbeat. Knowing such a hard time I've had. _But my life was worth more._

Never thought I'd hear a blood relation say _that_ about _me._

As it was, he assured me that I wouldn't be alone. Sometime soon Bella and the Cullen family were going to spring me from this place. I would be staying with them while I "recovered" from treatment. The whole family was trained to handle my "needs"…

True enough, Friday morning. I woke up in my bed to an _Alice_ chirping in my ear. "Morning Sleepyhead, rise and shine! Today's the day you get to come home with us!"

I groaned and rolled over. "No rising, No shining… guess Jasper forgot" whispering the last part to myself.

"Forgot what?"

I turned back over, "Nothing, are you here by yourself?"

She giggled excitedly, "No silly! I'm here with your brand new Mom and Dad!"

Mom? Dad? Yeah right I must be dreaming. "Okay…Alice, good night. I'll see the _real_ you in the am and Jasper, please hide the coffee."

"Sorry Nicki, caffeine has no effect on her. She's like this by nature." Dr. Cullen said, smiling as he leaned against the door frame accompanied by Esme.

"Oh I get it now Alice, you meant _your_ parents were here."

"No Nicki," said Esme as she came over and gently sat on the bed next to me. "Charlie has allowed us to adopt you…"

My jaw dropped, I couldn't be hearing this right. _"What?"_

Turned out to be true, incredible as it was. They then showed me the official papers Charlie signed himself. I asked how it got done so quickly. Alice said that they had a person constantly on call that handled whatever official documents deemed necessary.

Whoa! I was a part of a family! Somebody finally chose me! _For real, this time!_

But before the celebration could begin, there was still work to be done.

I was so glad that it was Esme instead of Alice who pushed my wheel chair to the exit. I really liked my "new" sister but there were times when I questioned her judgement and her speeding was definitely one of them. I sure didn't want to blow chips in her yellow Porsche. Luck continued to be with me, instead of the Porsche or Carlisle's Mercedes. They'd borrowed Rosalie's BMW and Carlisle was driving. Alice sat up in the front while Esme rode in the back with me. I stretched out, laying down with my head in my new "mother's" lap. I couldn't help closing my eyes and drifting off while she continuously stroked my hair.

I was having one of my bad days where I didn't have much energy.

I awoke to Esme calling my name softly.

Opening my eyes, I found we were in the driveway. Once out of the car, I wobbled a little bit upon standing. The girls reached out to steady me.

"Would you like me to carry you?" Carlisle offered, seeing me struggle.

I nodded mutely.

He picked me up with ease and carried me into the house. Placing me beside Emmett and Rosalie on the living room couch.

"Well would you just looky here? Hey Nicki-roo, you ready to become another of our Dr. Frankenstein's Monsters?" he teased,

"As I'll ever be, but I would like to see Seth one more time before it happens" I sighed out of breath.

I got my wish, those last few hours were some of the most magical and tender moments in our relationship. Even if all he did was just smile and take my hand. It assured me, everything would be alright. Finally when evening came, it was time…

Everyone was there, including my pack.

Seth asked if I wanted him in the room for moral support. I told him no, this was something I needed to do on my own.

Though it pained him, he understood. Making sure I knew that he loved me.

With one more "Good Luck" from _Edward,_ surprisingly. Since he was the one who voted "No,"

Carlisle escorted me to his office and on the "operating" table that was "borrowed" from the hospital. As he removed my prosthetics, he warned me (having looked at my medical chart) that with the way my heart was in its current status, it was a 50/50 chance of survival. He then asked if I still wanted to proceed, I nodded from my laying position.

The vampire doc then leaned over my body, whispering in my ear:

"I'm sorry, this is going to hurt" before he grazed over my neck once and _bit down!_

End of Part Three


End file.
